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November Home Birthers...... - Page 2

post #21 of 41
I have no problem telling people we're going to have a homebirth. They want us to give birth in the hospital, they can pony up the money for it. I think it helps that we're hiring the same midwives we hired last time and they were really wonderful and facilitated our transfer to the hospital when we needed it--trusting the care providers is important to everyone, I believe. It also helps that I'm a second-time mom and that has, at least so far, given me the confidence I need to be able to tell people where to stick it. About pretty much everything.
post #22 of 41
this will be our third homebirth. no plans, really. i didn't love waterbirth, but we'll have the tub just in case - you never know!
post #23 of 41
We are having a homebirth and I am sooooo excited! Our first birth was a natural birth in the hospital. I hired my midwife as a doula. This time there are no doubts, I want her as my primary care provider and I want to stay home!!!!

I used hypnobabies with my last birth and will use it again. I LOVED IT!
post #24 of 41
This is our 4th baby, 2nd homebirth. Very excited about doing it all again. I used the hypnobabies home study course and felt is was a very comprehensive course all around. I didn't like the old hypnobirthing tapes (that accent drove me bananas)- but don't know if they've been updated since it's been 5 years since I researched hypnosis for birth.
post #25 of 41
I just told my midwife this morning I wanted to look into hypnobirthing and she mentioned hypnobabies. What is the difference (is there one)?
post #26 of 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYMama27 View Post
I just told my midwife this morning I wanted to look into hypnobirthing and she mentioned hypnobabies. What is the difference (is there one)?
I've heard that hypnobabies is more comprehensive. Here is a HUGE thread comparing them... http://mothering.com/discussions/sho....php?t=1037835
post #27 of 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by Juliacat View Post
It also helps that I'm a second-time mom and that has, at least so far, given me the confidence I need to be able to tell people where to stick it. About pretty much everything.

Don't you wish you had it the first time around?! I feel the same way.

We've got the m/w lined up, not sure about a doula. There are a couple here, but I haven't 'connected' with either of them. It's too bad. I don't know what kind of help DH will be. I think he'd be good, but then all the stuff you read about with partners not really knowing how to help or what to do, etc, makes me worry, "What if he sucks!"

I'm excited but nervous about it. It will be a VBAC for me. There's a hospital close by (where I had an unnecessarean, and not VBAC friendly) in case of dire emergency. But the m/w is great with 30 years experience. I'm not a risk to her, which makes me feel good. She likes her moms to birth in water, which is what I'm after too.
post #28 of 41
This will be my third child, second homebirth. We're using a different care provider this time due to insurance stuff. I'm sad that our last midwife won't be here for this birth (she doula-ed my oldest daughter's birth, so she's been there for both of my previous labors) but I really love the midwife team we're working with this time.

Because there's a whole team (two midwives and possibly an apprentice as well) attending the birth, I don't think we're going to use a doula this time. All the midwives are trained doulas as well, all are women I'd have felt comfortable hiring for doula work, and there should be enough of them there to support me as well as taking care of the medical stuff. If money weren't tight, I'd probably have my previous midwife there as a doula this time just because I would love for her to be there for all three of my children's births, but unless we have some sort of windfall between now and November I just can't justify the cost.

My advice to anyone feeling concerned about others' reactions is to go with the don't-ask-don't-tell approach. Most people won't even consider the possibility that you'll be delivering anywhere but the hospital, so you won't have to tell many people unless you want to. Tell them once the baby is here and safe - then they won't have anything to worry about.

My oldest sister spent my last pregnancy praying that I'd get preeclampsia so that I'd have to deliver in a hospital. (In her defense, she had a horrible birth experience with her oldest and honestly believes that she owes her life and possibly her son's to medical intervention.) She was scared half to death. No amount of data would convince her that this was a safe choice. I wish I'd not told her until after the birth - it would have saved her a lot of stress.

That said, I get a kick out of people's reactions, so I end up telling everyone about the homebirth plans, how great my midwives are, how much I loved my last homebirth, etc. It's a bit perverse, I know. But on the other hand, a surprising number of people have reacted positively, and I think I've even influenced a few women to consider homebirths. Granted most think I'm nuts, but that's not new.
post #29 of 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by jess152 View Post
I don't know what kind of help DH will be. I think he'd be good, but then all the stuff you read about with partners not really knowing how to help or what to do, etc, makes me worry, "What if he sucks!"
My DH absolutely sucks at labor support. He means well, but it freaks him out, poor guy.

My feeling is that there's no substitute for experienced labor support. There's just no contest between someone who's observed fewer than four births and someone who's provided support to numerous laboring mothers. And a spouse is so invested in your well-being that it can be hard to step back far enough to see what might help you when you're going through the rough bits.

Do you love your MW? Does she have an assistant who can fill in for some labor support, or can she recommend a good doula?
post #30 of 41
This will be my second child, first homebirth. We went to our first mw appointment this morning!

Im so excited!

I told my family during my last pregnancy that I wanted a homebirth, but dp and i had not hashed things out yet. So they all know already, and if they have a problem they know me well enough to keep their mouths shut
post #31 of 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by jess152 View Post
Don't you wish you had it the first time around?! I feel the same way.

We've got the m/w lined up, not sure about a doula. There are a couple here, but I haven't 'connected' with either of them. It's too bad. I don't know what kind of help DH will be. I think he'd be good, but then all the stuff you read about with partners not really knowing how to help or what to do, etc, makes me worry, "What if he sucks!"

I'm excited but nervous about it. It will be a VBAC for me. There's a hospital close by (where I had an unnecessarean, and not VBAC friendly) in case of dire emergency. But the m/w is great with 30 years experience. I'm not a risk to her, which makes me feel good. She likes her moms to birth in water, which is what I'm after too.
Well, I just know so much more this time around. When I didn't know anything, I was much more susceptible to the opinions of people who seemed to know more.

Dh was only so-so as a labor support person when we were having dd, but I really do think he will be better this time now that he knows more, too. I wish waterbirth were an option for us but I don't see being able to fit in the bathtub and there is no room in our house for a birthing tub.

I love the term "unnecessarean." I had never heard that before. Awesome.
post #32 of 41
First baby and first homebirth : I've been wanting to look into Hypnobabies and now that I am nearly 13 weeks I might start feeling more comfortable in doing this.

I'm not sure about the Doula - part of me thinks I may want to be alone in a weird way, but who knows. I think my husband could almost be too helpful in labor if that makes sense.
post #33 of 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by Daisie125 View Post
I've heard that hypnobabies is more comprehensive. Here is a HUGE thread comparing them... http://mothering.com/discussions/sho....php?t=1037835
Thank you!

I regret not getting a doula for my first birth. My husband was a great support but he was very scared and not a good advocate for me. I really should have had a doula with me, especially since it was a hospital birth. This time around my girlfriend who is a student midwife will be attending the birth and will act as my doula but if she decides she can't commit I will definitely hire a doula.
post #34 of 41
We are planning one, and its our first experience ever doing it at home or naturally. My other three were in the hospital with epidural! I'm VERY exciting and hoping I can focus my summer on getting ready. DH and I are taking a monthly homebirth class. This month's class was on "how to catch a baby" if you have to do it without the midwife there.

I only plan to allow people there who have experienced home birth for themselves (which means NONE of my mother in law's or other family will be there this time!!!) One of my really good friends is going to act as doula (I was for her at her home birth on Thanksgiving last year!), and another good friend who had her last child at home will be my photographer. She is a professional photographer and has done all our family pictures the past year, and I thought it would be awesome to have wonderful pictures of our birth experience.

I would love to at least partly labor (and maybe do the birth) in water. So I need to order a kiddie pool for that. Our regular tubs just aren't big enough.

I'm also very intrigued by the hypnobabies idea and want to check into that. Having had three relatively pain free births in the hospital due to drugs, I'm kinda anxious about what sort of pain I'll be enduring. Anything I can do to help calm down that pain down to tolerable would be fantastic!!
post #35 of 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by saratchka View Post
Do you love your MW? Does she have an assistant who can fill in for some labor support, or can she recommend a good doula?
I have a lot of confidence in her. She's got 800 births under her belt. I just have to ask her what kind of labour support she will actually provide.

She's travelling from 3 1/2 hours away, and comes before you're due and stays. I don't think she'd bring an assistant with her, unfortunately. I will have to really think on the doula thing, because I'm kind of doubting my hubby now. He didn't pick up a book with my first pregnancy, so I don't know how into it he'll be this time around. He's a comfort and a helpful guy, but not knowing how I'll be in transition, etc. He could be quite useless!
post #36 of 41
I had my first appt. with my midwife this past week. She is great and I feel really comfortable with her. The prenatal visits are such a nice change from an OB's office!
My son was a natural hospital birth with a CNM. I really loved her and was lucky to birth in a hospital that was fairly hands off as far as hospitals go. But I've moved since then and I don't get the same feeling from the hospital here. Plus I just really don't want to put up with the little things of a hospital anyway, traveling in labor, hospital environment, stupid iv hep lock (drove me insane the entire time!!), and no access to a tub.
So I'm so excited to start thinking about how this birth could go. I'm planning a water birth and my midwife is very experienced with this. She also provides the pool!
I've only told a few close friends and my best friend is supportive but pretty concerned. She was my "doula' at my first birth but since then she has become a nurse and currently is working in the NICU. She saw some pretty sad events come through with the loss of babies from homebirth transfers. So I talked to her about how much research I am doing about homebirth and interviewing midwives etc. She felt better that I have really looked into my midwives experience and also that my midwife is an RN and worked in labor and delivery years before.
So doing a little reading right now. But trying to prepare myself for the event of moving. Dh is applying for jobs out of state and so I may have to start all over with the midwife search if that happens. Kind of makes me nervous to think about that.
post #37 of 41
Thread Starter 
The meeting with our midwife went great. She was wonderful at discussing our fears and made DH really comfortable with the idea. We are going to meet with a couple more midwives and then make a decisions.

After she left though, DH actually starting talking about where to put the birth pool and how exciting it would be for him to catch the baby.

Oh my, I may actually give birth in. my. own. home.

Now, to work out the money side of things. We are not low income but we are really high in bills since I quit working after Rachel and we moved to one income so the money for the hb is intimidating. I will start working on ins stuff this week just to see if anything may possibly be covered.

oh, ho exciting! And, the best part of all was that DH asked me if we could invite our families and share the experience. Huge deal since he really isn't that fond on my family and I really, really would love to have my mom and sister there! (or not there, whatever I decide since we will be in MY home, lol!)

Kelly
post #38 of 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by cands7673 View Post
I am due Nov. 28th and looking into doing a homebirth. I am looking for an experienced unlicensed midwife in utah. I haven't had any success finding anyone. Any suggestions?
Where in Utah are you located? I have contact info for several unlicensed ones, depending on the area you are in. Is there a specific reason you are looking for an unlicensed vs. licensed? (i.e. twins, more than two csections, or a philosophical reason?)


We are planning our third homebirth.
post #39 of 41

second baby - first homebirth

We are excited to planning a homebirth for this pregnancy.

Last time we had considered a homebirth, but insurance covered everything for the hospital and nothing for home. That made a decision, we thought if we had a doula, a solid birth plan and determination we could have the birth we wanted at the hospital. We had a provider that prenatally leaned toward the natural (she was different during labor).

Other than a little bit of pitocin we had a natural birth, but I felt like we were fighting against intervention the whole time.

We have less money now, but for us the choice is much clearer.
post #40 of 41
This will be my third homebirth and my fourth natural birth. Now that that icky first trimester is over I can actually give some thought to the birth. I've had some dreams about the birth. last time I felt I wanted to be alone and I mostly did labor and birth alone, but this time I see lots of supportive women around me at the birth. It's exciting! Still not sure if I will go with the midwife I used for all my other births or go experienced girlfriends and doula route! My last baby was born before the midwife arrived anyway! The plan is still unfolding!
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