How old is "too old" for LO to see parents naked? - Page 3

[Bluegoat]

I think as long as it reflects respect for others and the human body, it doesn't really matter. Different cultures and different families have different approaches to this, and that is ok. Some feel nakedness is not a big deal at all, people go to public bathes or saunas, in some places people don't wear any clothes anyway.

In other places, respect means covering parts of the body and giving privacy.

In either case, it's possible to be unkind and disrepectful, by intruding on other people or implying their nakedness is bad, making them feel somehow uncomfortable with the body.

I guess the only difficulty I can see is if a particular families practice varied widely from the cultural norm, which might be most likely in the case of a family that had moved. In that case, it might be best to make some sort of a compromise, since the children will be functioning in the new culture.

[dantesmama]

I voted "other." My boys are still very young (3.5 and 1.5) and always with me when I'm changing or showering or in the bathroom, so I don't see anything wrong with them seeing me naked. DP has never been very comfortable with the boys seeing him naked, although he seems to be getting a bit more relaxed about that. I think it all depends on personal comfort levels.

[BekahMomToOliver]

I voted 5+, but I totally agree that it's a comfort-level thing.
My mom liked to bathe with DS when he was younger (maybe 4 months to about 1 year), and I was totally comfortable with it, and with sitting in the bathroom handing her soap and toys and taking DS out when they were done, etc. Likewise, she was there for my homebirth and saw me naked quite a bit, and it didn't bother either of us one iota.
My dad would be another story though. We kids used to bathe with him until we were about 3 or 4, and then it was just uncomfortable for him. He's pretty conservative and has been known to comment upon the decency of a hemline or low-cut top on occasion, and he's always stressing about my sister's low-rise jeans and her *gasp* thong being visible!! I imagine as a father of four girls it's been a bit stressful for him
With DS, he's still so young that I don't even really think twice about him seeing me naked. And it's really important to me that he (and our DD on the way) have a positive body image and aren't ashamed or afraid to ask questions. I had huuuuge self-esteem and weight issues as a kid (still do, really), so body image is something I want them to feel confident and positive about, you know?
With DH, I suspect he's a litle uncomfortable with DS seeing him nude already, but it's not really a situation that comes up very often and he does handle it well if it does.
And obviously, when they're older, we'll discuss what is and isn't appropriate and with whom.
So really, it's an individual thing, so I think the most reliable way to guage whether it's appropriate or not is the comfort level of those involved. Not something I'd arbitrarily put an age limit on, personally.

[Ruthla]

It's fine until one of them gets uncomfortable with it. I still change in front of my daughters; my Mom still changes in front of me. Then again, I have no qualms about using a communal shower- I once had a very pleasant conversation in a JCC locker room with an older woman, while we were both completely naked. Maybe I'm not the right person to ask about same-sex nudity.

DS, at age 7.5, is starting to get uncomfortable with me being naked in front of him. This means that I make a point to not change in front of him anymore without warning him first. Most of the time he chooses to leave the room but occasionally he wants to keep me company.

[Jojo F.]

DS is 6 and neither of us have a problem with it- changing, showering, breastfeeding. I'm thinking until HE gets uncomfortable, like around puberty.

saving grace-

flowers- I do understand where you are coming from. One day I needed to "go" and DS burst in, then DH, then DH AGAIN!!! Needless to say I yelled, "Come on!!" after that third interruption. All I wanted was a few minutes to take care of business. It seems too much to ask somedays

[StoriesInTheSoil]

I haven't read all the posts but I saw the title and wanted to respond- My mom, sister and I all still change in front of each other and when I'm at her house and she's showering I sit in the bathroom and talk to her. Opposite-sex nudity (ETA: I guess actually any nudity) I'd say is inappropriate whenever it makes one party feel uncomfortable. Nudity is not an issue in my family and we were never secretive about bodies. My grandmother and I would go swimming in her pool and then we'd shower together to get the chlorine out of our hair so it wouldn't turn green and we did this until I was in high school and didn't visit as much anymore.

I don't love the feeling of most clothes so I prefer to not wear them when I have an option so I assume my children will see me semi-nude quite often. DP on the other hand, prefers to wear at least some clothing most of the time so the kiddos probably won't see him nude as much because that's his comfort level. I think every family is different here!

[limabean]

I voted 5+, but if a parent or child became uncomfortable with it before then, it'd be time to stop then.

As another poster said, I'll still change clothes in front of my mom or closest friends, but as far as actually hanging out naked like I do now when I'm doing my hair/makeup right after a shower, I wouldn't feel comfortable doing that in front of anyone except my DH (and kids, for now).

DS is 4.5, though, and I'm starting to get a little uncomfortable with it with him -- I don't mind him seeing me as I step out of the shower and dry off, but I usually put on a robe to wear while I'm getting ready now. I don't really know what changed -- nothing in particular, and he doesn't seem to feel any differently about it, but for some reason I just feel more comfortable covering up now. He still sees my breasts all the time because I'm nursing DD, and I don't mind that at all, but I just don't hang out naked in front of him like I used to. Interesting, I hadn't really thought about it until now.

[Porcelain Interior]

I don't think you can make rules ahead of time for this. You just don't know how your kids will feel.

My mom was uber au natural with the no shaving/naked all over the house no biggee thing. I respected that it wasn't a big deal for her, but I'm the opposite and I come by it naturally.

I do NOT want to be naked around people. I do NOT want to see my mom's business. I don't mind that much when it's other people doing the strutting, but I don't like feeling like a prude because I don't want to.

I really think this is a predestined personality thing.

There may be some household influence going on, but if that's the only thing that factored in I'd be a nudist right now.

[mommy2two babes]

Originally Posted by prothyraia

When it starts to bother either the parents or the children. Which I can't imagine happening until well over 5 years, honestly.

:

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by tinyactsofcharity

I don't love the feeling of most clothes so I prefer to not wear them when I have an option so I assume my children will see me semi-nude quite often. DP on the other hand, prefers to wear at least some clothing most of the time so the kiddos probably won't see him nude as much because that's his comfort level. I think every family is different here!

This is basically me and dh. He's not totally comfortable with the kids seeing him naked, anymore - and dd is turning 6 tomorrow, and ds2 isn't quite 4. DH is at the stage where he's not going to freak out if they walk into the bedroom while he's in the middle of getting dressed or anything...but does prefer to have clothes on with the kids around.

Me? I don't care at all. I'm mostly clothed around the house, because ds1 is 16, and I'm avoiding crossing his boundaries (I will admit that if he were uncomfortable with me breastfeeding, he could stuff it, though). We also live in a townhouse complex, in the corner unit near the street. WE get a lot of pedestrian traffic past the front of our house, and it's hard to pull the kitchen blinds all the way down (stuff on the windowsill), so that's a factor for me, too. My personal comfort level with nudity is pretty high.

[PoppyMama]

My ds is almost 10 and is unfazed by seeing me naked but he is more modest than before although he still likes me to sit and talk to him while he showers sometimes. I respect whatever boundaries he makes and if he was uncomfortable I would be more careful to always be clothed. Same deal with my dd (12). She does not like to be seen naked but is perfectly comfortable in a bra and boy short undies as long as our roommate isn't home.

[ShadowMoon]

I voted other but I want to vote never. (with the footnote that if a child or parent becomes uncomfortable then by all means you should stop.) Nudity has always been a non-issue in my family.

[confustication]

dd is 7.5, and completely fine with it- she doesn't really have any 'boundaries' though and is known to come wandering out of her room completely naked, having thought of something while changing. I am usuall dressed other than when I'm changing, but I'm not about to hide in my own home while walking the three feet from the shower to my bedroom. DH is more modest, and will always have on at least boxers- particularly as dd is his dsd- so HE enforces boundaries he feels are appropriate and has since she was about 3 when he came into our lives.

[mormontreehugger]

Originally Posted by Bluegoat

I think as long as it reflects respect for others and the human body, it doesn't really matter. Different cultures and different families have different approaches to this, and that is ok. Some feel nakedness is not a big deal at all, people go to public bathes or saunas, in some places people don't wear any clothes anyway.

In other places, respect means covering parts of the body and giving privacy.

In either case, it's possible to be unkind and disrepectful, by intruding on other people or implying their nakedness is bad, making them feel somehow uncomfortable with the body.

I guess the only difficulty I can see is if a particular families practice varied widely from the cultural norm, which might be most likely in the case of a family that had moved. In that case, it might be best to make some sort of a compromise, since the children will be functioning in the new culture.

:

[gabysmom617]

I say three because this is where my personal comfort level seems to be hitting the ceiling at. We dealt with this recently. We were at a family reunion which was held in a location where there were a lot of stuffed animals, one being an Alaskan brown bear standing on it's hind legs. My three year old was facinated.

Later, my husband came out of the bathroom from taking a shower stark naked. My 3yo looked at him, and told him that he was just like that big brown bear. Then it dawned on me he was talking about my husband's..."fur". : So yeah, he's taken to wearing undies around the 3 year old now.

[BennyPai]

Voted "Other"

Our oldest dd is 5 and we're all still comfortable. If that changes for dd or one of us, we'll respect one another's comfort levels and needs for privacy when/if ever it becomes an issue. I am sure it will be in issue for DP eventually - we have all girls and he isn't a natural nudist to start with ... (i.e. sleeps with a shirt on)
Both of our older dds (5 & 3.5yo) spend at least a portion of the day nude either around the house or in the fenced back yard. 3.5yo is nude more often than not ...

[momasana]

We view nudity as no big whoop. I'm comfortable with my body, DH is comfortable with his body, and I want DS to grow up comfortable with his body as well.

I voted "other" as I do not think there is a set age. Obviously, as many previous posters have mentioned, if someone starts to feel uncomforable we'll re-evaluate the sitch.

[2xy]

Originally Posted by Porcelain Interior

My mom was uber au natural with the no shaving/naked all over the house no biggee thing. I respected that it wasn't a big deal for her, but I'm the opposite and I come by it naturally.

I do NOT want to be naked around people. I do NOT want to see my mom's business. I don't mind that much when it's other people doing the strutting, but I don't like feeling like a prude because I don't want to.

Same here on all counts.

I never made a huge deal about nudity around my kids, either. We bathed together when they were small and there was never a "set" age when we stopped. It just stopped at some point, and since their dad and I prefer to wear clothing around the house, they just rarely ever saw us undressed.

Neither of my boys ever ran around naked, either. They always at least wore underwear around the house.

I don't remember how old I was when I began to be annoyed by my parents perpetual nudity, but I remember thinking it was gross for their naked butts to be sitting on our sofa. I never told them, though. I merely stopped inviting friends over and spent all my free time at other people's houses, because I never knew if my parents would be clothed when I got home, and it was embarrassing.

[Maela]

same sex - never
I remember seeing my mom naked occasionally up until I moved out. And my mom has seen me in changing rooms recently.

opp. sex - not sure. I guess I agree with everyone else who said that until a parent/child is uncomfortable with it. Dd (21mo) still takes showers with Dh at least once a week. But she has started pointing out his "penuh" (), and I think it makes him a little uncomfortable when she stares at it. I'm guessing sometime in the next year he won't want to be naked around her anymore.