Hitting slapping biting pulling

[baileyann3]

My daughter needs to read this forum. She's seriously not gentle.

Shell be one this month. She's always been strong willed and she knows what she liked (and doesn't like) a trait, for the most part I love


This has been going on awhile. She is very aggressive. She will crawl to me, pull up and then slap me across the face. I'll duck away, then she will reach and pull my hair. I'll grab her arm and then she will take her other arm and grab mycheek or lip and squueze as hard as she can until I scream, then she will laugh andcrawl away. Then she will crawl to her papa if he is here and do it to him. We try to just tell her gentle and show what nice touch is but it isn't working.

She hits kids in playgroup. I'm pretty sure the moms would rather her not be there. I have to shadow her the entire time, like overher shoulder and grab her arms when she winds up. Then she will steal toys and just throw them.

She is not gentle with the cats. They only come home for food now. She chases them and pulls their fur and tails.

I say be gentle, and soft touches all. Day. Long. Itsjust not working.

Do I just continue and hope this is a stage? Anyone elses babe this aggressive.

[baileyann3]

I just wanted to add: she can also be very sweet. Hugs and kisses. She even helps her dad give me a back rub, and she does it gently.

There is no hitting or violence in our house. We don't watch tv. Shes not in daycare, and only the gmas will watch her ocassionally and not for long stretches.

Please help. I just don't know what I'm doing wrong

[Devaskyla]

She sounds like a pretty typical 1 year old to me. Not much you can do at this stage other than redirect a lot, teach gentle touches with constant reminders & she'll probably grow out of it.

[Daphneduck]

In all honesty, this is a lot like how my DD was at 12 months. I was concerned, too, but it passed. The only advice I have is not to give her a big reaction, such as screaming. Sometime I would shriek in surprise and my DD would love it. She would pursue me when I gave her a reaction that amused her, but it ended pretty quickly when I remained impassive and simply moved out of her reach. Good luck, Mama. I know how frustrating it is, but it will probably be short lived.

ETA- I wanted to add that at that age, I thought that DD was the terror of her playgroup. After the fact, I found out that I was the only mom in the group that felt that way. The others just saw her as a little more rambunctious than their kids, but no where near abnormal. The behavior is always magnified when it's your child.

[russsk]

My 14-mo is like this, though just with me and DH, not other kids. And he is SUPER gentle with the dogs, giving them nice rubs and hugs. He's really sweet with us, too, but bites, smacks and pulls hair. He thinks its funny, so I just constantly redirect and hope one day he'll cease finding it funny.

[baileyann3]

Thanks everyone for reassuring me that this is normal. I think I might try no reaction at all.

She does seem to like my reaction. Sometimes she even hits me then shakes her head "no" like what I do when I say "no hit" except she has a huge grin. (secretely it's pretty cute)

Also she is one of the oldest in playgroup and definetely the most mobile. So that, I'm sure plays a huge part. Moms will see when there kid is my kids age. Then they will probably blame her for influencing them. Haha

[foreverinbluejeans]

I would skip playgroup.

It must be difficult when she hurts you. I think I would put her down. I wouldn't try to lecture or correct or anything like that, she is too young to understand. My first goal would be to protect myself. It would be great if she was able to understand that if she hurts she gets put down.

If you put crates, towers, and high safe cat places you can keep the cats in and safe. You don't want your cats getting hurt outside or getting wild. We have a baby in the house and 3 dogs and our 3 cats love their indoor cat spots to hang out on the cat tower, dressers, bookshelves, ect.