Thank you everyone!
I actually am not mourning my home birth at all I did my best till I just couldn't do it anymore and it turned out for the best because he ended up loges in my pelvis. I feel both my midwifeand I did the most we could it's sad he wasn't born at home but I'm ok with it. He ended up quite jaundice that's the only thingkeepi g us here.
We hope to go home tomorrow. I'm updating from my phone but soon i'll tell ya all about what happened and share pics he's so coolandlooksnothing like hisdad and I. Lol as for needing a sword he will start going to fencing pract with us asap. Our fencing friends can't wait to see him heheh