PP sex problems - please help! TMI update post 7

[Super~Single~Mama]

So last night my BF and I tried to have sex for the first time since Lincoln was born. He is 17weeks right now.

I know that my perineum is very open compared to what it used to be, so thats not the problem (my tear healed open partially I think), but he couldn't even put his penis inside me. He could get in like an inch, but then I just would.not.stretch open at all - and it HURT!! We were using a latex condom, and plenty of lube. We're going to try with a non-latex condom, but I'm possitive that wasn't the problem - it felt like I was going to rip open if he tried to go any further

We were using astroglide lube - lots of it - but I really think its b/c the tissue wouldn't stretch. It felt like he was hitting my pubic bone and couldn't get around it - does that make sense?

Any ideas on how to stretch it out or do I need to see my midwife again?
TIA

[ferra]

Were you sutured? My guess is that you need more healing time. If you want to do something you could do sitz baths. Def call your midwife and talk to her about it.

[hibana]

You probably need more time to heal.

[jecombs]

Are you BFing? That can cause the tissue to be very thin and fragile, making DTD really uncomfortable. Also, what degree was your tear? Was it repaired or just left to heal on it's own?

If you're really concerned, you might want to talk to your MW.

[Rico'sAlice]

I had a c/s so no vaginal issues related to the birth, and it still took me 6mo before I could DTD w/o pain. It wasn't until my hormones shifted some. I was still nursing, but got my period sometime around then and that's what made the difference.

[Super~Single~Mama]

I am BF'ing, my tear was a really bad 2nd degree - it took 3 midwives to determine that it was indeed 2nd degree and not 3rd degree. I was stitched, once immediately following the birth and then I had to be cut and re-stitched at almost 4weeks pp, then I had to have silver nitrate used to take care a bunch of granulation tissue at almost 12weeks pp.

I've gotten my period 2x since the birth now - once at 11weeks pp and once at 16weeks pp - which is almost identical to what my cycle was like before I got pregnant.

I guess I'll call my midwife and see whats up.
thanks everyone.

[Super~Single~Mama]

Update - TMI post

So I scheduled an appointment for my annual pap smear for next week, and I'll talk to my midwife about it then.

In the meantime, what could this be? I put some lube on my fingers and umm...explored a little, and things feel different. I'll try to explain, and maybe someone can give me some ideas. The front and back of my vagina feel the same as before, but on the sides there is what feels like scar tissue in the shape of like a ridge (for lack of a better word) and its very stiff - not supple at all. I highly doubt it was there before the birth, and I'm almost positive that its whats causing my BF to not be able to "fit" inside.

Is this just scar tissue that needs to stretch out a bit? I'm terrified that I'm going to need yet another procedure done to fix it! I'm not sure I could handle that - this recovery has been awful enough that I'm pretty sure I need to get a tubal or something to make sure I don't have any more kids, but I'd really like to be able to enjoy sex again!! And, its already been 4 months! I should be able to have sex again by now!!

ok rant over - but really, is this scar tissue?? I'm going to have to ask my midwife to know for sure I guess.

[purplemoon]

It sounds like the scar tissue for sure. That said, you may not need a repair but a)time b)estrogen cream

Hopefully that is the case.

Sorry you have to deal with that.

[Super~Single~Mama]

Originally Posted by purplemoon

a)time b)estrogen cream

Hopefully that is the case.

Sorry you have to deal with that.

So I can deal with the time one - but I've used estrogen cream already and it dried up my milk supply completely, so I can't use that again. Do you know if there is an alternative?

[purplemoon]

Ok, so B is out of the question. You could have the midwife or Gyno do shots of steriods and marcaine to break up the scar tissue. More surgery has a chance of recurrent scar tissue.

[jecombs]

OP, I hate to break it to ya, but DTD was not pleasant for me until DD was almost a year old. It stopped hurting when she was around 9 mo and was actually enjoyable closer to a year pp. Some of us just take longer to heal than others and we all react differently to those BFing hormones. You may very well just need time. As your LO cuts back on BF and you get more estrogen into your system, that scar may likely soften on it's own (like mine did).

[Super~Single~Mama]

Its not that it hurt - I mean it did hurt, but his penis wouldn't fit at.all. It just wouldn't go in period.

Oh well, I don't want another baby anyway, so waiting for sex isn't going to be that big a deal

[TzippityDoulah]

I rmemeber it taking a while before I could get my husband to fit comfortably even after my c/s! so it takes time. I know ti's been 4 months - no fun!! But it sounds like you've figured it to be scar tissue. EPO is supposed to soften tissues down there. and I don't think it harms with nursing... could you try inserting that vaginally for a while? if you get the kind with vitamin E in it - that helps heal scar tissue.

(I'm off to look it up to double check if it's ok during nursing)

[TzippityDoulah]

http://www.kellymom.com/herbal/ref/h...veningprimrose


This says it's fine to use during nursing. I would really consider this.

[Super~Single~Mama]

Awesome! Thanks for the suggestion! I have a bunch still from when I was pregnant and trying to soften my cervix - only makes sense it would work for scar tissue too...