info about stress stalling labor?

[scrappingmom]

I am due to be induced(starting cervadil) tomorrow evening(tuesday). As you know i've been having DAYS of close contractions, alot painful then they stop suddenly. WEll the last time the reason was DH blowing up because I reminded him that he needs carbs with his dinner(he was just diagnosed with diabetes and is CLUELESS about nutrition at all) he started screaming, yelling, saying if i ddint stop treating him like a kid he was leaving blah blah blah. Needless to say i ddint have another contraction afer that until today and they arent regular. He has been picking fights about absolutely nothing at all the last couple weeks. I realise he is under alot of stress with his diagnosis and all but its really taking its toll on the family, me, obviously but teh youngest girls keep asking me why daddy is being bad and yelling and things. It is somewhat comical watching a 21month old telling her father off in baby babble though

ANYWAY, i keep trying to explain how i need to relax and cant be stressing out more than i already am and how the stress can stall labor or keep it from starting and so on. how it can affect the baby and everything. I"m to the point where i'm considering asking him to stay home for the delivery.. but i'm sure that would just casue more fights.

Can anyone give me links maybe so i can send him there about how the stress and even just the lack of support can effect L&D, increase chances of c-section, baby, lactation, anything and everything?! I dont know how else to get thru to him at this point.

I"m already stressing and having bad feelings about this delivery ending poorly. 1 i'm being induced and really didnt want to. 2 i'm now measuring close to 8cm over what i should and normally i am slightly small. 3 i've had tearing feelings for weeks Dr said a couple could be tears in the muscle(abdominal i'm thinking as it feels more surface) and one hurts really bad when having a contraction i'm afraid labor may cause some super overstretched muscles to tear. 4 i've had difficulty delivering a 8lb9oz baby and i'm afraid this one is significantly bigger and i may end up having a c-section. like i said, i just ahve a bad feeling in general and having DH stressing me out, i'm afraid will really make things worse Also I believe the doc I DONT like is on call which is highly not cool in itself!

I still have a couple "little" battles to fight with him too... i dont like the boy name he has picked out(but i cant come up with a better one yet) and i've already informed the hsopital I refuse circ. DH doesn't agree "for cleanliness" i told him id listen if he researched, whih he hasn't so my say is going and the baby can pick when old enough. but yeah... still have those fights ahead , i'm waiting till after delivery though

Any info at all to direct him to would be a HUGE help! Thanks so much!!!!


maybe one of you with wonderful supportive DH's could send yours to wack mine over the head with a "support your wife" stick??? lol

I"m looking to my (nearly) 12yr old son to be my primary support person at this point. I"m glad he IS a sensative supportive young man and its awsome ahving him there for delivery and hanging out at the hospital he is great!

[Asher]

I don't have any links, but absolutely believe stress and unresolved issues can hinder labor.

I'm sorry your hubby is acting so badly in a time when you really need him to be your support.

[ColoradoMama]

If you sat down with him and calmly laid things out, would he respond to that? Maybe telling him that you're afraid that the stress in the household is affecting your labor, and you're afraid you'll have serious feelings of resentment toward him if the two of you can't calmly get through it all? I can tell you from experience that feelings of resentment over your partner's failings during birth are hard, hard, hard to get past. Lots of luck and good birth vibes.

[scrappingmom]

well little bit of goodish news.. I WONT have to have the doc i dont like! but it means waiting another day to be induced

As far as DH listening, he's in a better mood today so i'm hopeful but i've been trying for weeks now. he has a serious hearing problem but we cant afford hearing aids , in order for him to hear me i have to nearly yell, then he views it that i'm yelling at him, i've tried writing a letter but he only skims it and missses the whole point thinks i'm just telling him he is an awful husband which he isnt! He is unsupportive in general and absolutely out of touch with others emotions, yeah, but my 3 biggest complaints about him boil down to, he cooks, he cleans and he buys random gifts for me for no reason (cooks horribly unhealthy foods, doesn't clean fully,my way, just piles but at least he picks up, and buys stuff when we dont have teh money hence those being a problem )

well i'm off to search for some info so he can get a crash course tonight in the effects of stress and lack of support.

BTW, as soon as my Dr office called and said the Dr i dont like is on tonight, i started having nice contractions and loosing more mucus plug ..lol maybe my body wants that dr there???

[twins+1]

Maybe you two should go out to dinner and have a date and rekindle some feelings a bit? I doubt giving him some literature will really help when he's already feeling defensive. Sometimes I find with my marriage that if I give in a bit (and he does the same other times) and just show him how much I love him, he is more than happy to back down and talk and make up. Marriage is tough sometimes. Just try to take some time to relax and calm yourself down. I hope everything goes better than you are thinking.

[nukedwifey]

I know it does stop labor but I don't have any info I can post here. There was info on it in the book my birthing instructor gave me. She also does fear releases because of its effects on labor. If you think about it your stress is boiling down to fears that you have that are causing the stress. My DH and I have our conversations in the car. HAHA!! I know it sounds funny but there are too many possible distractions in the house. I have to be driving though as he can't concentrate on 2 things at the same time. Perhaps you should go on a drive together.

[scrappingmom]

lol.. rides are loud! at minimum we have to take the 3yr old and 22mo. The road noise blocks out him hearing me too we use to use that tactic till his hearing got to bad.

I/we have lots more stresses those are just the ones specific to the situation i'm hoping i can block out the others. the biggest being afriad my step daughter will do something to the family as she just got released into the community from a mental institution where she received NO HELP and is threatening to hurt(possibly kill) the family, specificly me and the coming baby. The hopsital knows so she wont be a concern while i'm there at least ...

[MaeHaftahurcha]

I don't have any links to info about it, but I'm quite certain stress can hinder or even halt labor altogether. I have a thing about IVs and when they tried to induce me I was doing great with the Cervadil, but the second the IV went in for Pictocin my blood pressure shot up from the stress and I stopped dilating. I know that's just anecdotal evidence, but it made me quite certain that it happens.