will I ever get over it?

[Super Glue Mommy]

I get so upset when I witness children being hurt... it upsets my physically. Today at the bookstore a child was having a meltdown because the mother wouldn't buy a book. I get child tantrums, my children are pretty good about not getting things when we go shopping but I know its something a lot of parents struggle with with their children and so I could really "feel" for the situation. The handful of tantrums we've dealt with in public were more then enough for me to understand how embarrassing it can be, and what got me through was the reminder that my children are not the first to do this nor will they be the last. That aside, I wish I had left the bookstore a little earlier today. As I am coming out of the elevator to the 1st floor to pay for my books there is a child having a meltdown on the elevator about wanting a book. The mother hits this child and the child is now crying owie owie owie! My heart sank, my heart started pounding, I was over come with anxiety and became nauseas. Ugh, I hate feeling like this every time I see something like this. I wish I could just not see it, but that not being an option I wish I could at least not be so physically sickened by the sight and sound of it all. Obviously, never leaving the house wouldn't be fair to the rest of my family either, so here I am just dealing with the anxiety on the (too frequent) occasion I witness something like this. And then, the child resumes the "i want a book i want a book" and I think, all for naught. Going to story time at the library is supposed to be fun for the child, and for this child it ended in being physically hurt and at the same time I feel bad for the parent because surely they would preer NOT to hit their child... and hitting their child is obviously not giving even short term results at this point. Yet, who am I to say anything, so I kept my mouth shut while my face was surely red.

[octobermom]

I always feel sadness for both the mother and the child especially when I don't have the entre back story. Its very sad how many will not even bat en eye at a child being struck and will assume they "deserved it" When an adult could be cursing and spitting on another person but if the other walked up and slapped them instead of say calling for help they would be seen as in the wrong. We don't extend any bit of grace to little ones .
At the same time when spanking was what you grew up with its realy hard not to revert back in stressfull times. 99% of the time public spankings I see are knee jerk reactions as are the followed if you hadn't I wouldn't have responses . Breaking the cycle of abuse is really hard. I actually try to make an effort about addressing the "good" not just the polite kind well behaved kids but the mother who probelm soved the kid desire for a new toy in Toys R us. the father engaging his daughter in picking the perfect cereal at the groccery store. ect sometimes with a smile sometimes with words depending. I try to build up the confidence during the good in hopes they will step back evulate and try again during the bad.

Deanna

[soccermama]

I'm sure I would've felt the same way as you, Super Glue Mommy. I see it far too often, myself and it makes me cringe each time I do. How horrible of a situation and how embarrassing for the child.