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Some New Faces? -- Lurkers

post #1 of 152
Thread Starter 
So there seems to be a fair number of new names popping up, how about introducing yourself, tell us what brought you here and how you came to this subject. Give as much or as little info as you want. I just thought it might be interesting.
post #2 of 152
I'll jump in and say hi

I started researching circ when pg with my first, who was a surprise but turned out to be a girl Now I'm pg with my third, who is a boy, and just started running into the comments from other people.
post #3 of 152
I'm lurking!

I'm goBecgo. I'm in the UK. Because i am surrounded by uncirc'd men i have always been vaguely horrified with the idea that a whole society so similar to my own would routinely do it, so i suppose i lurk to read about you all fighting the good fight for all those little boys. It's strange to think of people having such strong beliefs about amputating a little baby's genitals in an educated country - i know that sounds weird and judgemental but it's late and i'm a bit clumsy with it. It's almost like hearing someone say the world is flat, i feel like "wow, do they REALLY believe that!?" because it's been many decades since routine circ'ing happened over here, there is NO segment of society that would ever think this was necessary/a good idea. I literally know NO little UK boys who aren't intact.

My dad was circ'd late due to repeated infections and scarring because his parents used forced retraction to "clean" him. His brother (20months younger) is intact so they obviously learned their lesson thank goodness!

I tend to post on AUstralian sites a lot too, and they also still have a circ'ing culture (it's slowly changing) and i like to post the link to The Prepuce video as it's such a great piece with all one needs to know.
post #4 of 152
I'm a lurker! I'm trying to learn what I can right now in case we have a boy. I didn't even realize there was such a movement about it until our Bradley instructor brought it up. My oldest sis has 3 circ'ed boys. With the last one she said she was really hoping for a girl so she didn't have to go through with it again...made me kind of wonder why you had to do it, but didn't think too much about it.

I actually watched her 2nd son get circ'ed...they do it in the nursery at the hospital she delivered at in plain sight of the viewing windows. Kinda crazy, I know. And yes, it was hard to see. They strapped him to a little board that held all his limbs still and draped a paper sheet over his whole body that had a little hole in it for the penis to stick through. I don't remember what they did for pain relief if anything. It makes me sad to think back on it now that I'm more educated.

Lurking here has totally changed my mind about circ'ing! Thanks ladies!
post #5 of 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by GoBecGo View Post
I'm lurking!

I'm goBecgo. I'm in the UK. Because i am surrounded by uncirc'd men i have always been vaguely horrified with the idea that a whole society so similar to my own would routinely do it, so i suppose i lurk to read about you all fighting the good fight for all those little boys. It's strange to think of people having such strong beliefs about amputating a little baby's genitals in an educated country - i know that sounds weird and judgemental but it's late and i'm a bit clumsy with it. It's almost like hearing someone say the world is flat, i feel like "wow, do they REALLY believe that!?" because it's been many decades since routine circ'ing happened over here, there is NO segment of society that would ever think this was necessary/a good idea. I literally know NO little UK boys who aren't intact.

My dad was circ'd late due to repeated infections and scarring because his parents used forced retraction to "clean" him. His brother (20months younger) is intact so they obviously learned their lesson thank goodness!

I tend to post on AUstralian sites a lot too, and they also still have a circ'ing culture (it's slowly changing) and i like to post the link to The Prepuce video as it's such a great piece with all one needs to know.
You know I feel the exact same way. As an intact guy, whenever I hear people saying the most ridiculous things about circumcision to me it's indeed like saying the world is flat. By the way, in Australia circumcision for the most part has died out and the majority of guys in my generation are intact. What's interesting and encouraging about the US situation is that a big chunk of the population has rejected the procedure. I tend to find that the younger generations as well as people from well educated and diverse backgrounds are most likely to question and reject circumcision.
post #6 of 152
I guess I am a lurker on this board- but I post in other forums in MDC. I became very natural living centered and adopted the "if it aint broke don't fix it" attitude about the body, so for me when I started planning a family it was a no-brainer. But I did bring it up to DH (you know the if we have a boy, what do you think....) and that was when he told me he could vaguely remember the pain of his circ, and that he has pain issues with the scar. He also has a very tight circ, so he has issues with his skin being too taught when he is erect causing a host of pain and irritation issues.

So that cemented it for me, but then I found this board, and really learned some things! I watched a horrific circ video and was convinced that not only is this wrong but torture, and a human rights violation- so I speak out against it whenever I have the opportunity.

Thank you MDC for this awesome forum, and to all the posters with their great collective wisdom!
post #7 of 152
I just wanted to pop in and welcome you all! Thanks for sharing!!!
post #8 of 152
Thread Starter 
Well, welcome to you all, I'll take a quick turn. For those who don't know, like Tennisdude, I too am an intact guy, in the US; we do exist. And thanks to the efforts of great parents like those here, there are more and more. There are a few others like Tennisdude and I and our hope is to give that perspective and perhaps give insight on questions that only we know. For those lurkers and new folks always know you can ask me anything you want either publicly or PM.
post #9 of 152
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by an_aurora View Post
I'll jump in and say hi

I started researching circ when pg with my first, who was a surprise but turned out to be a girl Now I'm pg with my third, who is a boy, and just started running into the comments from other people.
Welcome Aurora, how are those comments going?

Quote:
Originally Posted by GoBecGo View Post
I'm lurking!

I'm goBecgo. I'm in the UK.

I tend to post on AUstralian sites a lot too, and they also still have a circ'ing culture (it's slowly changing) and i like to post the link to The Prepuce video as it's such a great piece with all one needs to know.
GoBecGo, don't even get me started. I live here and I can't believe it. Things are getting better little by little. I think you'll find Americans shocked that no one else does this but even that revelation isn't usually enough. As for the Australians, I think things are well under control there. I agree with TennissDude and the boards that I've seen don't seem to support circumcision too much. There are still people doing it but it's much reduced. Not perfect but they'll get there.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Evie's Mama View Post
I'm a lurker! I'm trying to learn what I can right now in case we have a boy. I didn't even realize there was such a movement about it until our Bradley instructor brought it up. My oldest sis has 3 circ'ed boys. With the last one she said she was really hoping for a girl so she didn't have to go through with it again...made me kind of wonder why you had to do it, but didn't think too much about it.

I actually watched her 2nd son get circ'ed...they do it in the nursery at the hospital she delivered at in plain sight of the viewing windows. Kinda crazy, I know. And yes, it was hard to see. They strapped him to a little board that held all his limbs still and draped a paper sheet over his whole body that had a little hole in it for the penis to stick through. I don't remember what they did for pain relief if anything. It makes me sad to think back on it now that I'm more educated.

Lurking here has totally changed my mind about circ'ing! Thanks ladies!
That is a real problem the visibility isn't as good as it can be. That's why it's important to discuss it as often as possible. And to do so in as non confrontational a way as possible. As you know, not everyone knows the facts. I am glad we have helped you I hope you'll be able to help others.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unconventional1 View Post
I guess I am a lurker on this board- but I post in other forums in MDC. I became very natural living centered and adopted the "if it aint broke don't fix it" attitude about the body, so for me when I started planning a family it was a no-brainer. But I did bring it up to DH (you know the if we have a boy, what do you think....) and that was when he told me he could vaguely remember the pain of his circ, and that he has pain issues with the scar. He also has a very tight circ, so he has issues with his skin being too taught when he is erect causing a host of pain and irritation issues.

So that cemented it for me, but then I found this board, and really learned some things! I watched a horrific circ video and was convinced that not only is this wrong but torture, and a human rights violation- so I speak out against it whenever I have the opportunity.

Thank you MDC for this awesome forum, and to all the posters with their great collective wisdom!
You know, I think 'problems' of various kinds are more common than we think. But like all things sexually related, people aren't comfortable talking about it. Changing that could really help us.
post #10 of 152
Well Im Angela and mother to a son who is circed a daughter and then another son who is intact. I came here basically to learn more about circs and intact penis's. I was soo naive about an intact penis, I have never seen one in real life (well besides my newborn boys) and I did not realize that when an intact penis is erect it looks like a circed penis....which led me to think then wth do we cut the foreskin off!!! Anyway Im learning a lot and slowly trying to get over the guilt from my first son and learn more and more about why being intact is how it is meant to be
post #11 of 152
welcome to you all!!! thanks so much for coming out, please stay with us and chat away...
post #12 of 152
i cric'ed my first boy. i was 19 and not educated about it. it was something that was done. but when i was 30 and i was preg again, i started thinking about it. i still wasnt informed and prob would have done it again. thank goodness DD was a girl. since she was born i found MDC. i am now preg again. i dont know if it is a boy or girl yet, but have already informed DH circ is not an option. b/c of my lurking I feel very informed on care of an intact penis. which in my opinion sounds a whole lot easier than care of a newly circ'ed one. B/c of MDC I stood up to my DH who has since dropped the issue. if it is a boy MDC saved his skin. literally.
post #13 of 152
I guess I should say "hi" as well. I'm a 23 year old mama to a beautiful 15 month old DD. I ran across some circ talk on a similar community online. I was intrigued by what was said so I went to DH to talk about it, just asked general stuff ya know "why does everyone do it" "what's your thoughts on it" blah blah. Of course he was for circ'ing and let me know that we would circ our sons if we have some oneday. So I began researching, brought some research to him, and then told him to think about it. Some days later he let me know that if we ever had a son he would be left intact! I began feeling strongly about the issue, it bothered me that people could be doing this due to lack to education(I would have been that person if I hadn't ran up on this stuff). So I decide to speak up about it, talk with my family (who is shockingly on my side, most said that regret circ'ing their boys) I also wrote up a fact sheet that went out to the local OBGYN in my town for new moms about circ'ing. I lurk often in hopes of helping someone or educating myself further. So, hello everyone!
post #14 of 152
Hello...sometimes I post, but mostly I lurk. I get a warm fuzzy knowing that we made the RIGHT decision for our son, born May 2007. I had a very mainstream pregnancy, I barely even knew about the circ wars----I knew it was a "concern" to some, but I didn't realize how committed people were to defending their side. Mainstream me left it up to my DH to decide. He said that we don't belong to a religion that circs, so therefore there was no reason for it. DH is intact himself---was born in Europe to European mother/American father. I admit, I was a little nervous to ask him because we didn't discuss his penis much, coming to the US when he was 4 I didn't know if "being different" was a source of anxiety for him, I had previous boyfriends who were a little self-conscious about their intact state, which sucks! I was in school in Canada when I dated an intact Canadian, and he was most proud of his physique, it was so refreshing! Here, it's "shallow-woman repellent" and I hate that it's an issue at all!

It wasn't until DS was 4 months old that I found these boards and realized the depth of this decision and I am SO happy my DH had the foresight to know! : I pretty much didn't care either way, until I saw 30 seconds of the Jeannine Lauber circ documentary on youtube. She cautioned that some of the images were disturbing, and then it cut to a SCREAMING baby boy in agony and dispair and I had to turn it off. My heart still hurts over it. No one could ever convince me to do that to any baby.

ETA: When the topic comes up, which is rarely, I do mention to PG mainstream friends that I too would have circ'd if my DH said we should have. But that now that I've seen a glimpse of that video, it's made a difference on our daily lives that our son wasn't circ'd, that it was the most important parental choice we've made this far. I really want to hit it home that I understand where they're coming from, but that this is a v. serious matter, particularly for a mother's heart.
post #15 of 152
I'm guilty of lurking! My only child is a girl but I was only slightly conscious of the debate until I came to these boards. I already knew that I wouldn't have it done if dd had been a boy because of my Pagan beliefs (let nature be!). My husband took some convincing (relatively little, actually). Thankfully I didn't have to show him any videos, I couldn't even sit through it. He was mostly just worried that I would find his penis unattractive or mutilated. Which I do not, btw

I was very much enlightened and informed by these threads, you intactivists are doing an excellent and noble thing : Thank you so much for fighting the good fight!
post #16 of 152
nak-

I've lurked for the past few months. My 16 month old is intact and I love to read these boards for empowerment and support-when he looks red or that d@mn doc retracted him before I could say "stop". My dh put up no fight to not circ ds (dh is circ'd) and I really haven't had any negativity (luckily) about my son's penis from family, friends, or caregivers-even though everyone except older generations are circ'd (those family members in their 80's). My reasons for keeping him intact were 1. human rights issue 2. how unnatural a circ'd penis looks 3. no medical reason for it.

I hope to gain the courage to be more vocal about leaving boys intact by visiting this site. I post things on facebook, but have not had the courage to talk face to face with a preggy mama.
post #17 of 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by KaylaBeanie View Post
I'm happy I know all of this before ever having kids.
Or a husband, right? Not that you should choose based on that aspect alone, but it certainly doesn't hurt to go into it with your eyes open! Good that you and your ex-BF found out where each other stood before committing to anything!
post #18 of 152
I am pregnant and I think it might be a boy this time. ??? I lurk from time to time. I live in the midwest where it is : to even think about NOT circing. So if I do bring up the topic it gets negative reactions. I work in a pedi hospital where nurses talk about how awful it is when an uncirced boy comes in. They say the parents have never cleaned under the foreskin and the kid is going to get an infection blah blah blah. So I need to learn from this forum
post #19 of 152
MamatoPeach,

please take the time to educate the nursing staff at the hospital if you can. It is possible to cath without retracting and proper care instructions too. HCP's are the major culprit of so many boys' problems. Thank you.
post #20 of 152
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamatoPeach View Post
I am pregnant and I think it might be a boy this time. ??? I lurk from time to time. I live in the midwest where it is : to even think about NOT circing. So if I do bring up the topic it gets negative reactions. I work in a pedi hospital where nurses talk about how awful it is when an uncirced boy comes in. They say the parents have never cleaned under the foreskin and the kid is going to get an infection blah blah blah. So I need to learn from this forum
Def. read our intact care thread. The nurses are most incorrect as trying to clean under a foreskin is what causes the problems! I hope you get a boy, he would be a lucky little guy.
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