Giving Information

[Super Glue Mommy]

This is one of my favorite Gentle Discipline "tools"

Share your successes with this too! (I love to hear the success stories!)

Son: Mom, Not a big orange juice. Little orange Juice! (translation) I didn't want a big one, I wanted a little one)
Me (giving information): If you take a couple sips it will become a little orange juice. (next on my list was I could take a sip or we can dump a sip out lol)
Son: (Takes a sip. Looks at orange juice.) A little orange juice! (drinks rest of orange juice)


The orange juice.... again...
Son: MOM! NO LITTLE ORANGE JUICE! BIG ORANGE JUICE!!
Me (giving information) I don't like when people yell at me. I like when people say please before I help them.
Son: Please more orange juice mommy.
Me: (pours more orange juice)
Son: Thank you mommy!

Son: (Swinging toy around)
Me (giving information): You can do that safely by doing it in your room.
Son: (goes to room to play) (comes back swinging it again)
Me (giving information) You can do that safely by doing it in your room.
Son (goes to room to play, then decides he rather hang out with us then swing the toy in his room LOL

Son: Go to School! Go to School!
Me (giving information): School is closed until Monday.
Son: Oh. I'm Cold. Blanket.

Son: Outside!
Me (giving information) It's raining.
Son: It's raining! It's raining! (looks out sliding glass doors) Outside later.
(of course we could have went outside even though it was raining but obviously neither of us were in the mood)

Son: Max and Ruby!
Me: That's not on TV right now. We can watch something else. (puts on a different show)
Son: Not this one!!!
Me: You can say no thank you mommy, and mommy will look for another one. (start looking for another one)
Son: No thank you mommy. Not this one.
Me: (still flipping channels, there is nothing else acceptable on) Listen to Mommy. (something I say when I need to to tell him more then a sentence or two but need him to listen to everything... we try not to do this too often though because of his speech delays) "Max and Ruby is not on until later. We can watch _____ or _______ -
Son: No!!!
Me: Listen to Mommy. We can watch __________ or _________ -
Son: Quiet Mommy!!
Me: You need a quiet moment, please. (this isnt me telling him he needs a quite moment, this was me expressing I understood he needed a quite moment with a rephrase)
Son: Starts watching the channel we are currently on.

(not a perfect example in retrospect. I was trying to let him know OR we can pick a movie, but what he really needed was to just be upset that max and ruby wasn't on. All he needed was that info AND a chance to process the feelings attached to it. Then he could move on and allow himself to enjoy something else - but I still thought it was worth sharing)

Orange Juice Again...
Son: Help Mommy!! More Orange Juice!
Me (giving information) You haven't used the potty since you drank your last cup.
Son: No pee pee on the floor.
Me: Right. Using the potty between drinks helps you not pee on the floor.
Son: Ok.
'(above scenario is a repeat too. I give him this info but I don't with hold a drink from him if he is thirsty. He will let me know that he still wants orange juice. If he has an accident I don't say anything about that either - he doesnt like having accidents though so knowing that something may cause an accident seems to be information he appreciates having)

I hope you all will share some stories

[vrclay]

Thanks, these are great ideas for a new parent.

[Shannie77]

Great post!

I read How to Talk So Kids Will Listen - I think this method is talked about in there?! I use it all the time with DD (just 2) and it is such a great tool. I also find it helps keep situations much calmer than they might be if I used other less effective methods.

[AFWife]

Maybe it's because of the way I was brought up (my mother talked to me like I understood her and other parents thought it was weird) but I can't see handling these situations any other way... To me, it makes sense to talk to him and explain what's going on...