You know you are the parent of a toddler when...

[CarolynnMarilynn]

-You child eats croutons and a freezie for dinner and you're pleased at least some calories went into the child at dinner (don't blast me - I've got older kids who get junk occasionally and besides, he's breast fed too!)

-You are tired by 11 o'clock in the morning, really tired

-You look at their beautiful sleeping faces and think, "Wow, he's so beautiful!"

-You look at their tear-stained tantruming face and think, "What was I thinking when I thought this was a cute age?!?"

-It's all smooshy kisses, runny noses, things flung to the floor, the cutest pouts, and watching someone catapult from happy to frustrated to content to screaming to nursing to happy to frustrated to content to....

[MeepyCat]

My son has been practicing scowling. When I scowl back at him, he laughs. And then he scowls again and announces "I gwumpy!"

You know you're the parent of a toddler when...

...you start counting down to naptime at breakfast.

...you assume, about 50% of the time, that "no!" *does* mean "yes!"

...you always have a tissue in your pocket. Even if you just put these pants on a minute ago.

[shanniesue2]

You know you're the parent of a brand-new toddler when:
-you think, "awwww he's throwing a tantrum"

(yes, I know it will get to a point where it's not cute to me anymore, but for now he's only 15 months old)

[peaceful_mama]

---you've sat in PEE in your favorite recliner (and you don't have a cat or a dog in the house)

--you've forgotten what it's like to sit and eat an entire meal without having to get up and do anything or tell anyone else to sit down/stay out of my plate/you said you were done, now go play

--you consider an orange/yellow flowered sundress, pink pajama pants with multi-colored presents on them, a blue/pink flowered hoodie jacket, and red/blue brother's flip-flops to be a perfectly acceptable going-out outfit (Hey, it's 50 degrees and she has chosen to cover her arms, and she can WALK in the store because she has footwear!)

--it's just not worth the argument to get the pajama pants off! (I TRIED to convince her she did not need them, she hid and put them on anyway)

[kirstenb]

--You don't remember the last time you peed without an audience
--All your furniture has become part of a giant toddler jungle gym
--You find yourself saying things like please don't lick the dirt

[Beating Earth]

- you tell your DD that the cat does not know how to fence
(We had been to some SCA fencing practices with Daddy)
- "We do not use the wand/pencils/vacuum attachment to hit Daddy/the cat/the dog"

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

-you are the skinniest you have been in YEARS because you are just worried about whether or not THEY get fed.
-Your legs are actually bruised from getting kicked while changing a diaper.
-Your living room is no long yours, it belongs to the TOYS.
-you can sing every little song from Blues Clues.
-your heart goes into your throat when you hear the toilet flush.
-all those things that scared the crap outta you when they were first born are just distant memories, and somewhat laughable.
-you get a baseball thrown at your head and you dont even bat an eyelash.
-no matter where you bring your child, you are immediatly childproofing the joint in your head, and anticipating what they will go for first.


I could do this all day ladies.........

[slvsquared]

You say things like : Don't lick the baby.
Sister doesn't WANT to shake her body like Elmo
Sister might not want to eat the crust.

[blizzard_babe]

Originally Posted by shanniesue2

You know you're the parent of a brand-new toddler when:
-you think, "awwww he's throwing a tantrum"

(yes, I know it will get to a point where it's not cute to me anymore, but for now he's only 15 months old)

I find DS's first attempts at tantrum-ing to be kind of amusing. I know I'll get sick of it REALLY quickly, but right now, they're so short-lived that it's kind of funny.

[blizzard_babe]

You're the parent of a toddler if you can't find something, the first place you check is the bathtub, because... oh, who the h3!! knows why he likes putting everything in the bathtub?

... if your landlord asks for a pet deposit and you silently think, "the dog's no trouble, I should be putting down an ISAAC deposit."

... if you've ever said, "I really don't think the dog wants to be sat on."

You're the mother of a NURSING toddler if you have spaghetti stains on your nursing bra.

[sarahn4639]

You find yourself saying things you never thought would pass your lips such as:
-we poop in the toilet NOT the yard!
-take the cat's tail out of your mouth
-get your hands out of the toilet!
-we don't eat rocks/dirt/paper/crayons/erasers/banana peels/ect
-get out of the garden! again and again and again.....
-licking the toothpaste off the toothbrush is not brushing your teeth.

[peaceful_mama]

--you've ever felt compelled to explain that "daddies don't make milk"

--you have to explain to someone that yes they DO need to put SOMETHING on over their underpants to go to the store.

--you've ever "invented" a potty. (DS was on the toilet the other day doing #2, so I stuck the potty ring on the bath toy bucket for DD--who thought it was *hilarious* that she peed in the bucket )

"Get your FEET out of the PEANUT BUTTER" is an actual quote from breakfast...

[nj's_mom]

-- when your toddler takes off, you use your Mommy Mind-Powers to visualize where they are headed, and beat them to it

-- it makes you jump up and down with glee when they take a bite of something nutrititous- oh joy, a banana!!

-- you're forced to nurse a doll- and silently commend your kid for sharing "her" boobies


Thanks for the laughs ladies, I needed it!

[carrie a.]

lol

the tv, computer, house phone, and cell phone are all used to keep your lo happy (sometimes all at the same time).

any food that's in a dip form is contaminated by little hands.

you give lo options for where she might want to fall asleep today: couch?, stroller?, car? and you actually get in the car and drive to nowhere if that's the answer.

the last word from every sentence you say is repeated.

you dance with you shadow in the driveway and don't care what the neighbors think.

you don't care what anyone thinks.

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

Originally Posted by carrie a.

the last word from every sentence you say is repeated.

Not only that, but there is a an upper octave added to the end of the word, like they are just double checking that is what you said.

"mama, doin?"

"Im putting new batteries in your racecar".

"racecarrrrr?????"

"Yes, it needed new batteries"

"batterieeeeeeeeeees?"

[Mal85]

You think it's totally normal to say things like...

Please don't put your fingers in your poop!

Please don't put your poopy fingers in your mouth!

(yes, those just happened)

[hakeber]

• You have ever said the words: The bidet is NOT a drinking fountain!!
  
  
• You find yourself dropping modal and linking verbs and have given up on articles and the third person singular -s even when not addressing your child.
  
  
• You know all the words to the latest Disney movie dvd release and sometimes can be found singing the theme song to one of several shows on PBSKIDS/CBEEBIES.
  
  
• You have a favorite PBS kids show.
  
  
• You have picked a cheerio out of your hair during a business meeting.
  
  
• Most of your meals consist of half eaten food like yogurt pots and PB&J sandwiches.
  
  
• You have ever ejected breakfast cereal from your DVD machine.
  
  
• Your handbag (which used to carry some make up, back up perfume, and a Palm Pilot and could fit in your hand or under your armpit at a party) is a bottomless treasure trove of necessity so that when out with friends at lunch you could produce a bandaid, scotch tape, deodorant, a snack, several small candies for bribing emergencies, crayons, a toy car, scrap paper for drawing on, tissues, wipes, anti-bacterial gel, an extra pair of socks, and maybe even a balloon, and your friends wonder when you turned into Mary Poppins and do you have a house plant in there?