What do you do when you just don't LIKE your pet?

[BarnMomma]

I feel guilty admitting this but I have a cat who I really, really don't like. I've never had a cat like this in my life and I've owned a cat, or multiple cats at a time, my entire life. This one? NO redeeming qualities. And it's getting worse.

This guy was a rescue as a 4 week old kitten. (No good deed goes unpunished?) Now, at 9, I'm at my wits end. I dread the very sight of him.

-He has a leaky butt and leaky butt glands (Vet says nothing can be done) And so he leaves trails behind. Gross.
-He has an unual coat which gets bald spots, and then overgrowths. He looks liek someone took a clipper to him but only got bits and pieces. He sheds like no animal I have ever seen and you can't pet himn without clumps of hair coming off (Vet says nothing can be done)
-He is obese. All he wants to do is eat. He is on a diet (again) which makes him ravenous for food and so he eats whatever he can find...coins, string, plants, and then throws it up. The cats pukes all darn day and of course only on carpets unless he is eating free choice cat food... which then makes him fatter which then means he can't even maneuver to clean himself properly and the skid mark thing worsens. It's a nasty cycle. Did I mention the diabetes he's given himself?
-His teeth rot and fall out. I've spent $3650 on dental work thus far. Why? Who knows. Bad genes? Vet has no answers.
-He is prone to bladder blockages which run from $350-$3000 in vet bills and also come with pee stains all over my house
-He attacks mny other cat as a way to get attention when he is hungry which is always
-The one and only redeeming quality was he was perfect with his litter box. Well, that just ended and now he is peeing everywhere despite just being given a clean bill of health. I had to rip up all of the carpets on the 3rd floro of my house becasue he peed all over the place.

I have tried all the usual suspects for the peeing thing and nothing is working. I'm sick of cleaning up poop stains and pee and puke. I'm tired of the hair and cats fighting. I'm tired of the howling and begging for food 24/7.

I really can't stand this cat and I am lost as to what to do. I"m not one to give up animals and so I will endure it but I serisouly have stress over this rotten cat.

OK. Thanks for letting me vent.

[it's just apples]

I believe that at a certain point, you have to put your family first. I grew up in a house with a cat that bit, and a cat that peed (not the same cat, ironically). Neither pet had a diagnosable medical issue (we TRIED to find one). No diet helped. We tried special Cat Attract litter, automatic litter boxes, litter boxes in literally EVERY room of the house, feliway, etc., etc. My parents ultimately kept each cat until it died a natural death but it was miserable to live with them.

The cat that peed probably caused the most damage to our home and our family. My parents had to strip our house down to the sub floor and pay lots of money to have a company that specialized in disasters come in to remove the odor when they sold the house. All of the carpets and even some of the drywall had to be replaced. None of the furniture was usable, because even if she hadn't peed on it the smell was absorbed.

We couldn't have people over to the house at all. To this day I almost panic if someone comes over. I'm a friendly, outgoing person, with a clean home (we have 2 dogs that are housetrained and I keep our house nice). I can't get over the humiliation of living like that though.

I wish that my parents had put our family before the cats. Obviously rehoming probably wasn't an option. I wish that they had considered euthanasia.

[Porcelain Interior]

I think sometimes we have to put them down.

I had a cat that I lived with for 3 solid years (and spent tons of money on) that only wanted to pee on fabric. Got her urinary checkups all the time, had to have RX kitty food. Got occasional UTI's which we'd always get her taken in for and put on antibiotics. We tried keeping her confined to one or two rooms without access to fabric. We tried different litter. 50 different little boxes to choose from *not really, but several for 1 cat!* and nothing we did ever stopped her.

She ruined mine and my children's bedding, mattresses, clothing, handmade quilts etc.

She ruined furniture. She ruined our carpet.

She ruined our meager social lives.

Our house after 1 year (since we put her down) doesn't smell, but I had to throw basically EVERYTHING we owned that was fabric out.

What put me over the edge was someone telling me on a different message board that CPS would take your kids away for allowing them to live with an animal that was peeing on their beds, and clothes etc.

Now I never ONCE ever ever let my kids sleep in a bed with pee on it, we ended up buying vinyl (yuck!) covers and throwing out countless bedding sets, but they were right it isn't fair to children to live in a house with kitty surprises around every corner. Beautiful gifts and nice things being tossed out.

To save one cat's life? I'm an animal lover through and through, but there's a point where you have to say enough.

I put our cat down for my kids sake, and my sanity. She was my DD's cat, and putting her down has had it's own repercussions with my child, but it just wasn't right to go on like that.

I encourage you to carefully weigh your options, and I fully believe if you need to put Mr Kitty down you've done your very best.

The truth is there aren't places or homes out there that will take cats like this.

This is also why people give their cats up to the shelter and some poor unsuspecting person ends up with leaky kitty because someone didn't have the spine to say "This cat has these issues".

They don't rehome cats like this.

It's so sad, but I think you might need to put him down.

[BarnMomma]

Wow, thanks for not flaming me!

I never really thought about putting him down but I do wonder if his behavior is due to being almost totally ignored? Once my real human baby came along, the cats kind of got put on the back burner and of course now that I hardly have time to even shower as I chase after my almost 2 year old, the cats are for sure not getting much attention or afection. My other cat could not care less. As long as she has her fluffy blanket to cuddle up on, she's fine. The pain-in-the-butt is, as luck would have it, an affection hound. But really, when I'm constantly with my son, how do I pet and play with a leaky butt uber-shedding cat?

What breaks my heart is DS is learning to just say OUT! when he sees a cat becasue that's pretty much all we ever get to say to the poor thing. But he can't come into the den or our bedrooms anymore becasue I don't want butt stains where my son sleeps and plays.

Ugh and did I mention that our hourse is on the market? So that just makes extra work for me every day as I scour each and every room to make sure everything is not only neat and tidy, but also fresh and free from pet souvenirs.

Sigh.

We also have 3 birds and a turtle and horse and the cat is more work than all the rest of the critters put together!@!!!

[phatchristy]

If I had a cat that was:
--diabetic
--with rotten teeth (if it's that bad kitty likely sounds like he's got stomatitis or something of that nature)
--chronic, untreatable or difficult FUS (urinary blockages)
--balding, itchy coat
--chronically infected anal sacs

( oh, ever been tested for FIV? That's a cat with a whole host of issues and kind of begs for some sort of auto-immune disease diagnosis)

Most likely the cat would feel rather miserable from all of that. I'd be surprised if the cat didn't act out (inappropriate urniation can happen with an animal that is in pain).

I'd put the cat down. Honestly, if it's in that bad of shape it's inhumane to keep him alive.

JMHO. And, I'm an avid cat lover. But, loving a pet is not about keeping it alive above all costs. It's about doing what is humane and best for the pet. And, if an animal is suffering, having the vet put it gently to sleep would be part of 'loving it'.

[phatchristy]

Originally Posted by BarnMomma

We also have 3 birds and a turtle and horse and the cat is more work than all the rest of the critters put together!@!!!

Wow, that is a really bad sign. I've had birds, dogs, frogs, hamsters, fish, gerbils....and IMHO cats are easier than any of those pets! So, you've definitely got yourself an atypical kitty situation there)

[Breathless Wonder]

Are you continually seeing the same vet? Or have you gotten a second (or even third, or fourth) opinion? Because honestly, maybe someone else has some better ideas.

Also, have you considered a cat run?

[Magali]

[Thalia the Muse]

I was thinking the same thing about getting a second opinion -- a lot of that is not normal and it seems like it should be treatable.

It just sounds miserable for all of you! And yeah, not much of a quality of life for the kitty if he can't be helped.

[2xy]

To be honest, everything you describe sounds like food sensitivies. Does this cat eat commercial food?

[Minky]

I love cats. I have five cats and I consider them a part of my family. But if any of my "babies" lives became so miserable that they were unable to clean themselves, had teeth falling out, had constant painful bladder infections, I would have them put down. I would grieve, but I would do it.

Explore the food sensitivity issue first, maybe see another vet, and if you can do a cat run or confine to one room for the rest of his life, I suppose you could do that.

But think about this creature's quality of life--it's not good, and perhaps it's time to let him go.

[newbymom05]

I had a cat that developed potty issues and I put him down when we couldn't resolve them. Children shouldn't have to be around that IMHO. Of course I felt terrible, but honestly, now I'm so glad I did it. I can see toys or a piece of clothing on the floor and not worry about it being peed on, or see the baby w/ something in his mouth and not worry it came out of the cat. Don't feel guilty--you have to do what's best for your human family.

[mamallama]

I also put down a cat with unresolvable potty issues.

I spent a small fortune looking for answers. I lived with it for years. Finally the day came when I had to say "no more."

It was like getting my life back. The relief was immeasurable.

She had redeeming qualities, and I do miss her, but I have zero regrets. It was the right thing to do.

[onlyzombiecat]

Our cats live in our basement and enclosed back porch. They are fine and can't make a mess of anything.

I might seek a 2nd vet opinion. If nothing helpful can be done then I would consider having him put to sleep. He sounds miserable.

[calmom]

i am a BIG time cat person but if the cat was destroying my house like that, i would let it be an outside cat and just give him lots of love when you see him. maybe you would feel more like petting him and loving him if he wasn't inside your house.

i know some people don't believe in outdoor cats but cats can be very happy outdoors and i would just accept the risk that comes with it. if you still can't deal with the other health problems and you simply cannot shell out anymore money, euthanasia wouldn't be a terrible choice, in my mind.

[BarnMomma]

Hi,

Well, the cat is not in pain and over the nine years we've had him he's been to 3 vets. The teeth thing started at about 7 months. All three have had the same opinion.

I can't really take the thought of putting him down. He's a pain in the butt and makes life difficult but I can't justify ending his life for that.

The litter box thing is new: about 3months this has been happening.

I don't want to put my cat down. He is a part of the family, albeit one we don't really enjoy. But hey, I also have an aunt I can't stand so I guess....

[greenmagick]

I know someone else mentioned it, but why not get a cat run or build something to keep him in (or bock off a room)? Stuff it full of toys, his litter box, beds, etc and then he wont mess all over the house. Also, when you have the time you can go in an give him some attention.

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

My cat had litter box issues that cost me carpet as well The thought of putting her down was something I couldnt deal with.

She is a healthy cat other than her box issues so I couldnt justify having her put down just for that. I saw it the same way as I see dealing with a incontinent person actually. I would never consider putting a human down for it so I wouldnt do it to my cat. When I adopted her and her sister I swore to care for them until death and that didnt count me putting her down for anything less than sickness.

She now has her own private room that she stays in unless I can watch her and I let her out and pet an love on her. Then she goes back to her room. She will be with me until her health deteriorates and she has to be put down or until she passes away on her own.

She is happy in there with no kids waking her up. She sleeps when she wants eats when she wants and is no longer destroying my house. She is 15yo and I fully expect her to live a lot longer.

I can totally understand someone having a cat put down but for me it was like killing a member of my family and in the end not something I could do.