Any success stories on validating feelings?
Here are a few we had...
My friend came to visit with her son and her son had a hand held video game and m son wanted to play with it but her son didn't want to share and so she put it up. My son started crying.
Me: You really wanted a turn with that. It looks like a fun toy.
Him: Yea. I cry I cry.
Me: You are sad you aren't getting a turn. It would be fun if you could play with it all day! (moving into giving wish through fantasy at this point)
Him: Yea. I wanna play all day.
Me: I know.
Him: Let's go play. (and he walks away)
Tonight he wanted to go to bed and wanted his sister to go to bed too but she didn't want to go to bed.
Him: (her name) go to bed. get her.
Me: She's not going to bed now. She will be here later.
Him: (sitting down looking sad) No happy mommy, no happy!
Me: You are sad.
Him: I sad.
Me: (hugging him) I know sweetie.
Him (moving on now, just looking bored)
Me: Should we read our story now?
Him: Yes! No mouse story. Dinosaur story.
I find sometimes you just need to be there with them and go through emotions with them. You don't always have to find a solution or "be reasonable" with them. Sometimes it's just a "passing thought" and once they express it and know its okay they don't care to look for a "solution" they are bored with it and just want to move on to the next thing
Here are a few we had...
My friend came to visit with her son and her son had a hand held video game and m son wanted to play with it but her son didn't want to share and so she put it up. My son started crying.
Me: You really wanted a turn with that. It looks like a fun toy.
Him: Yea. I cry I cry.
Me: You are sad you aren't getting a turn. It would be fun if you could play with it all day! (moving into giving wish through fantasy at this point)
Him: Yea. I wanna play all day.
Me: I know.
Him: Let's go play. (and he walks away)
Tonight he wanted to go to bed and wanted his sister to go to bed too but she didn't want to go to bed.
Him: (her name) go to bed. get her.
Me: She's not going to bed now. She will be here later.
Him: (sitting down looking sad) No happy mommy, no happy!
Me: You are sad.
Him: I sad.
Me: (hugging him) I know sweetie.
Him (moving on now, just looking bored)
Me: Should we read our story now?
Him: Yes! No mouse story. Dinosaur story.
I find sometimes you just need to be there with them and go through emotions with them. You don't always have to find a solution or "be reasonable" with them. Sometimes it's just a "passing thought" and once they express it and know its okay they don't care to look for a "solution" they are bored with it and just want to move on to the next thing
