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Let's talk about birth options ...

post #1 of 79
Thread Starter 
I'm a staunch home-birther. In TX, that was fine because the laws were not nearly as archaic as they are here in MO.

I'm very torn about the idea of birthing in a hospital. I hate the loss of control and the 'superior' attitude they have. Not to mention, the difficulty they give when you opt out of 'treatments' like vit. K shots and eye goop. If I birth in the hospital I know they'll label me adversarial(sp?).

Anyone else obsessing over birth options yet?
post #2 of 79
I'd love to try a homebirth. I'm just having trouble finding a midwife close enough in our state. This is my fifth and final pregnancy and I'd like it to be at our home we just bought last year. I think that would be an awesome thing to tell my child. You were born in this house. I haven't given up yet. My midwife, who lives 60 miles away and over a mountain pass, is checking around for someone even 10 miles closer. It doesn't look promising though because I had to travel the 60 miles to find her! She thinks the child might be born at home regardless of our plans because my labors our so quick now. I just don't want to be shipped off to the local hospital, (only 7 miles away), for an uncomplicated birth. Any suggestions?
post #3 of 79
Thread Starter 
I totally relate. I usually go about three hours, start to finish, now. I just do not want the stress of trying to 'make it' to the hospital 35 miles away. That's another issue.

Have you been to the Unassisted Childbirth forum yet?
post #4 of 79
Thread Starter 
You know, you mentioned a mountain pass ... we just moved to MO and it gets icy here in the winter. We are from south TX and are not used to that. I had not even considered getting out on icy roads in advanced labor.

AAAARRRGGHH.
post #5 of 79
I am having a UC...

My first was with a midwife and I ended up being transfered because of "Failure to wait" and I had to fight to not get a c/s... (they were threatening me by saying they would go to a judge and I was putting ds's life in danger and he would never come out because my pelvis was too small and he was too big... when really he was posterior and it was a long labour and when he finally turned (after 49 hours) he was born without me even pushing once)
I would never go to a hospital again unless it was a true emergency.

Anyway... ds #2 was also posterior and I was threatened with another transfer and refused, another midwife came in and helped get confidence in myself and ignore everyone and listen to my body... I threw everyone out, got some sleep while going through transition and when I woke up he turned and came out as fast as my first.... the student midwife that was there pulled on the cord to "help" detach the placenta and I hemorrhaged.

DS#3 was a full UP/UC and he was the biggest baby and the easiest and quickest labour with the least stress... I could not go back...
post #6 of 79
Thread Starter 
My dilemna with a UC is the 'danger' of a transfer or an investigation by children's protective services. I have to weigh the importance of birthing MY WAY, plus the potential risks of hospital interventions during labor and with the baby after with the potential for life/family altering consequences of an overzealous CPS worker that believes doctors are gods and women should not be allowed to birth at home.
post #7 of 79
I am having a homebirth with 2 wonderful midwives.

However, because of the very real possibility of twins (I had fertility treatments with two eggs and my levels are very high), I am kinda nervous about how that will play out in a homebirth situation.

I'm scared to go back to the hospital. I had a fairly traumatic birth with my son and honestly stepping foot in a hospital causes me to panic.
post #8 of 79
Quote:
Originally Posted by Usually Curious View Post
My dilemna with a UC is the 'danger' of a transfer or an investigation by children's protective services. I have to weigh the importance of birthing MY WAY, plus the potential risks of hospital interventions during labor and with the baby after with the potential for life/family altering consequences of an overzealous CPS worker that believes doctors are gods and women should not be allowed to birth at home.
I can deal with the doctor at the local hospital if I had to transfer and I know many of the nurses at the local hospital because I use to give the breastfeeding portion of the prenatal visits...

and as for the legalities, UC is legal and I have nothing to hide... so I don't see a problem...
post #9 of 79
I'd love to have a homebirth. I would freak everyone out though, this time, so I am doing the "showing up pushing" thing at the hospital I reckon. Unless he or she comes out sooner!

You can probably understand why I say this. There's no way on earth or in hell I am having another cesarean unless it is an absolute emergency. I would sue. I'm serious.
post #10 of 79
I had a wonderful home birth with #1 and am definitely planning on birthing at home with this one. I was born at home and I was lucky enough to witness the births of both my little brothers at home. I can't imagine doing it any other way!
post #11 of 79
I think I am having a hospital birth this time. I had an attempted homebirth with ds (hospital transfer) and a successful homebirth with dd. I think it just might be easier for us all the way around to have a planned hospital birth this time, though. I want the kids to be able to stay here at home while I'm in labor (which they can't if I'm having a homebirth), plus I won't have to drag everyone out to Children's Hospital for the hearing test and newborn screen. And financially it would be tough to gather all the $$ for a homebirth by January.

I haven't totally ruled out homebirth yet, I'm just going to take my time to decide.
post #12 of 79
I am planning a hospital birth with an OB... as CNM don't largely deliver here in St Louis. Due to the fact that I work in the hospital I will birth in, I have a really high comfort level with it, and to me it doesn't feel cold or sterile. Hopefully I can have the birth I planned last time with DH, utilizing birth hypnosis, laboring in the tub, and a vbac.
post #13 of 79
Quote:
Originally Posted by Usually Curious View Post
My dilemna with a UC is the 'danger' of a transfer or an investigation by children's protective services. I have to weigh the importance of birthing MY WAY, plus the potential risks of hospital interventions during labor and with the baby after with the potential for life/family altering consequences of an overzealous CPS worker that believes doctors are gods and women should not be allowed to birth at home.
You're absolutely right that you have to weigh your options and decide which is best for you; but I encourage you to really do some research and make your decisions based on facts, rather than created scenarios that are very unlikely. Facts show that UC is indeed legal in all states except Nebraska, and even there the law isn't enforceable and never has been enforced because it simply states that a baby can not be caught by the father in a non emergency situation (I couldn't make this up if I tried) How, do you prove a 'non-emergency' and it doesn't say anything about a mother or someone else catching the baby.

I know 3 women who have had successful UC births without any politics. Also, when I went to the state office to get a birth certificate for my DD, since homebirth with a midwife is illegal in my state, I reported it as an UC childbirth. Nobody asked any questions nor did CPS come knocking down my door. Just my 2 cents, take it or leave it
post #14 of 79
Quote:
Originally Posted by Usually Curious View Post

Anyone else obsessing over birth options yet?
YES! I want a homebirth, am fantasizing that that's what I'll get but I'm just not feeling hopeful.

We had a great hospital experience with DD's birth and I wouldn't be overwhelmingly sad to have something like it again this time around. I so wanted to try for a homebirth last time but DH wasn't comfortable with it (he's more on board now that he's seen that my "natural" ways aren't baloney )

This time... I suppose there could be weather to contend with but that would be an issue either way - we're 30-45 minutes from the hospital (without winter weather). So, worst case scenario would be a transfer from home with bad weather at the last minute.

Obsessing? Definitely.
post #15 of 79
actually, UC is very much legal in nebraska. i just had one 3 years ago. and while techinically it is 'illegal' for a father to catch his baby, it's true they never enforce it. in fact, they put my husband down as the person who 'delivered' the baby, even though i asked them to list myself. all my paperwork reflected that i had an unassisted pregnancy and an unassisted birth, and no one gave me any grief. i didn't even have to provide proof of pregnancy.

here's the opinion on the father catching the baby bit:

http://www.ago.ne.gov/agopinions/det..._search_id=713

there are also underground midwives in the area. here's the opinion on 'lay midwives':

http://www.ago.ne.gov/agopinions/det...search_id=1523

i'll be doing another UP/UC.
post #16 of 79
I want a homebirth, but there are so many factors for me.
With DD I planned one, had the pool all set up and everything. Then when she was just shy of 41 weeks I felt off, so I called my midwife, we checked my bloodpressure and it was high. She instructed me to go to the hospital, where my bloodpressure was fine. Anyhow they were about to release me and they did an ultrasound 'cause I was nearly 41 weeks and they found out that I had no amniotic fluid, but my water hadn't broken. I was induced, it all went to pot and I had an emergency c-section the next morning. (DD's heartrate was hovering around 50)

So this time I want a homebirth, again. And we've bought a new house with a lovely soaker tub that would be perfect for a waterbirth. But I'm going to wait and see first to see if I am pregnant with multiples (I had fertility issues and an IUI with 7 eggs) and I don't know if I will hire my midwife right away or wait to make sure I don't have the same issue with my placenta which is what everyone agrees is what caused me to have no amniotic fluid.

Also everyone (doctors and midwife) think that my placenta got old fast and that's why I had no water, it also caused DD to be small, and hungry, and I had no milk, she had a seizure and ended up in the NICU, so I am totally scared of that happening again.
post #17 of 79
Quote:
Originally Posted by rsummer View Post
I am planning a hospital birth with an OB... as CNM don't largely deliver here in St Louis. Due to the fact that I work in the hospital I will birth in, I have a really high comfort level with it, and to me it doesn't feel cold or sterile.
I'm in STL, too. Where do you think you're delivering? I went to MoBap with my kid.

I had my daughter in the hospital with an OB and it was the picture perfect, intervention-free delivery. In fact, I was considered the rock star for actually going natural. It was just a really good experience.

For my last pregnancy my husband and I talked about homebirthing, but, like was mentioned in the quote - it's not so easy in this area.

Honestly, I would like to "accidentally" UC while the old man is at work so he doesn't worry.
post #18 of 79
I had planned a home birth with DS with a midwife. I started labor at home and things just did NOTTTT go how I wanted. Nothing medical, just did not feel I was getting what I needed (support, etc) from my midwife and became really uncomfortable. Ended up going to the hospital.
The hospital was actually quite wonderful. Very open, let the baby stay in the room, etc.

I would feel comfortable if I was going back to the same hospital, but we might be moving so I am not sure that is an option. I have a bitter taste in my mouth about midwifes and home birth

I am just so confused about what to do. I guess for now I am just waiting it out to see if we are moving or not before making any decisions.
post #19 of 79
Definitely a UC and UP again. Still debating if I want to hire a midwife or not, just in case and for paperwork. We used to live 35 minutes away from civilization, but now live literally next door to the hospital if there was a true emergemcy. I don't usually bleed much, never had complications, longest birth was like 6.5 hours. I feel educated enough to not need a midwife, but I also dread going in for the paperwork and getting flagged by CPS and in our new state only CNMs are recognized. I have not ever met a CNM I was impressed with or who would strike me as being okay with being on call for a UC. Still have to ask around to see how it actually plays out in real life though.

If I had one I'd want Angelina for my midwife, truly, just for the massages.
post #20 of 79
you bet!

I've interviewed one midwife already, and have 4 more interviews lined up in the next two weeks. Though deep inside I know that I'm going to have to choose between two midwives already, the other ones are just for covering my basis. I am so lucky to live in such a home birth friendly place!

I had my son in the hospital and it was ok, the birth itself was amazing and I did feel very empowered. But since then I have been working as a doula in hospitals in the area, including the one where I birthed, and there is no way in hell I'm having a hospital birth. Obviously if there's an emergency I will transfer, but I'm having this baby at home
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