Thanks again everyone.
He apologized for the other day. Said that he always overeacts whenever he senses that someone is even hinting that he doesn't care about his daughter enough. Which again isn't precisely what I said, but I was trying to make it clear that his sometimes more laid back approach could really bite him later and I am tired of hearing him whine about these things when he isn't pro-active from the start... and then of course he can't take anyone's advice on a different approach.
Maybe I have a slow learning curve or something... Basically I accept the apology and move on... hoping he doesn't make me feel like crap again.
I just know he wouldn't be able to survive without me and I don't think I could live with myself knowing that and putting him in that position... I know, I know... the next line of thinking is he ultimately put himself in that position because he sucks at talking to people and treating them well...
I really want him to go into counseling for himself... I think he really needs it. But I don't know if he will ever really see that and admit it and do something about it...
I could try to write another letter and say that is part of an ultimatum deal... but gosh that is a terrifying thought.
I know the circle of him blowing up and apologizing happens far too often... I do know this deep down... But I can't even dream of leaving him, granted most of that circles around financial reasons. I wouldn't have any kind of chance of living on my own and would be destined to live with my parents who honestly would drive me more insane within a week's time.
My Mother can be very unsupportive of my parenting choices and it gets to me so incredibly much. I get so stressed out by her constantly telling me how to parent my DD and get on me about giving her cereal. I have heard this for the past month and a half now how I need to be giving her cereal.
Or anytime we go somewhere, "why can't you just bring a bottle?" "why, Mom, I got everything I need attached to my body."
I'm sorry for ranting and taking up your time... I know nothing will ever change... My parents won't support me leaving a second marriage, especially with a child involved, and there is no way I could afford to make it on my own... so
I do my best at staying sane and "not rocking the boat" so to speak I guess.