The Joys of Potty Training...need help!!

[Ummy]

Hello all,

My ds is almost 3 and still wearing diapers, he hides whenever he wants to go poo poo and then later he doesn't want me to change his diaper. I have tried taking the diaper off, putting training pants (he goes in them just like the diaper) putting on just underwear and he makes accidents..poo and pee...so i am just frustrated. What worked for you when you potty trained....I seriously need some potty train successful stories advice.

THANKS

[bendingbirch]

This potty training post I wrote that has normal physiological milestones for bowel and bladder control may be of help for you: http://theparentingpassageway.com/20...ing-with-love/


Also, since summer is here I would consider spending a lot of time naked! Some children truly do start by doing a bowel movement outside - true, true. Boys of ages 3 and 4 can be the most resistant to potty training I think from what i have seen in my experience. Does he have the urinary end of all of this down?

The best thing to do is really to relax and treat it as no big deal - he will get there! He obviously has awareness that he is going, if he has a particular time of day where he has a bowel movement sometimes you can start there by trying to go to the bathroom then.

Potty training can be a long process until they truly gain complete control, coupled with the fact that there are physiological times of increased urinary incontinence and also constipation...

Hang in there, momma! I am sure you will get lots of great advice on this important subject from the wise mothers on this list!

[Mom2M]

I will also be watching this! My sister has no idea what to do. Her son is 3.5 and truly doesn't care if he poops or pees in underwear or diapers. He never tells her if he's wet or has pooped in the diaper and when she tried having him pick out his own underwear, he still didn't care.

Glad you posted this! I don't know how to help. Maybe the naked outside stuff will help, they live in a wooded, rural area.

Deb

[mistymama]

Almost 3 is still pretty young. I wouldn't stress over it (easier said than done, I know)!

My ds decided he wanted to use the potty the day after his 3rd b'day - but that was pee only. It took another 6 months before he would poop on the potty.

Honestly, when they are ready, they do it, and IMO pressure and other tactics only delay that outcome. So my best advise is to just wait, be patient, and he will learn when he's ready. Almost 3 is still very young.

[lotus.blossom]

Mine is almost three and we had a brief potty stint at 2.5 that seemed to be going well but then he got a really baad bug and had diahrreah for 2 weeks and needless to say we went back to diapers (then I had a baby so thats another roadblock) We have been singing this little ditty at every diaper change. I tell him that when he has hid birthday its "No more diapers!!!" When I ask him wht happens on his b-day he sings it. No more diapers! So I hope that by the time it rolls around he will be used to the idea. I also hope that *I* am ready!! But he is starting preschool in the fall so I want him to have a start on this process.

[_betsy_]

Is *he* interested in and ready to potty learn, or are *you* just tired of diapers? Cause if it's the latter, it'll be a long, drawn-out and frustrating experience for both of you.

[FertileMertel]

Naked!

My advice is to let your son go naked. This advice was given to me by my girlfriends with older boys who swore by their success. My first reaction? NO WAY! I don't want poop and pee all over my new carpet and furniture! My friends insisted my son will use the potty and being naked makes them more aware. So I tried it. My boy started potty training at 2.5. The first day I put the little potty chair in the kitchen (put it somewhere near where he plays.) He only had one accident. We have only had 2-3 accidents in months (when the diaper is off, put undies on and all bets are off!)My son did not really want to poop on the potty at first. In fact, he would hold it in and get constipated. Then he would ask for his diaper.

However, I am by no means a master at this. (I wasn't really ready to commit to potty training when I started, my fault) We still wear diapers in public and in the car.

My son pooped consistently in the potty for weeks then started asking for his diaper. I gave in b/c I figured he wasn't quite ready, and I didn't want to push it. Maybe a mistake. Before, even with his diaper we could get him to go poopoo on the potty, but right now it's a lost cause. He says, "No potty, Me go poop me bedroom." (He likes his privacy!) I am a teacher so I will have the summer off. I think I will be getting rid of the diapers and will tough it out. I am prego again and want him potty trained before the next one comes in January.

[phathui5]

My now three year old wasn't ready to be out of diapers until he was 3 1/2. Nothing I did to try and teach him worked and then a couple weeks ago we spent about a day reminding him to go every hour. Now he's pretty much done; he doesn't even wear a diaper at night.

[spmamma]

My DD is almost 2 and we just finished our training period. She's only had two accidents in the last week, so I consider the process to be a success. :

I know it's probably very different to train boys, and perhaps older kids too, but I thought I'd mention what we did:

We started pre-training weeks before by reading potty books and talking about how soon DD wouldn't need diapers anymore. We then started the actual training on a Monday morning right after breakfast. That morning, she got to open a big wrapped box that had all of her new potty stuff inside (toilet insert, foaming hand soap, training pants, step stool, flushable wipes, chocolate chips for treats and a couple of pairs of "underwear" for her doll).

I put DD in training pants right after breakfast and we spent about a half hour showing the doll how to use the potty. Then I put DD on the potty (she'd already had her first accident by this time) to practice. That day, I had her sit on the potty every 20 minutes or so, and asked her every five minutes if she needed to pee pee (more as a reminder to be mindful of her body than anything else, because she always answered "no").

I watched her like a hawk all day long and was quickly able to figure out some signs that she needed to go: fidgeting, sudden running back and forth between activities, squatting, grabbing herself and squeezing her thighs together.

Every time she had a success on the potty, she received a couple of chocolate chips and I made a big deal about it with praise, hugs, etc. Sometimes, when I knew she had to go soon, we'd hang out in the bathroom and read books (sometimes while she stood around, others while she sat on the potty).

I think just spending a lot of time in the bathroom and on the potty without pressure to go really helped her get comfortable with the idea of using it. And once she started actually peeing and pooping on the potty, her comfort level skyrocketed and she had no problems using it after that.

Now I take her into the potty whenever I sense it's time to go, meaning if it's been a while since she last went or if she's showing signs of needing to go. We also go at regular intervals each day: before bed, before we eat, before we go out, when we get home, before mommy gets in the shower, etc.

I hope this helps a little. Good luck, mama!

[FertileMertel]

Great Ideas!

Such wonderful ideas!! I think that if I would have been more committed to the process and used your fun ideas, we would be done by now. Unfortunately, the novelty has worn off. I think I will try your "potty box" idea to get the enthusiasm and interest started again. Thanks!