Kids NEED to get exposed to bullying/sex/drugs/mean teachers/discipline - Page 2

[waiflywaif]

But why wouldn't they have a parent to help guide them through it without homeschooling? Unless you're thinking about boarding school, parents are around during the school years!

Even with homeschool, kids are going to reach a point (hopefully) where they go and do things alone or with a peer group. It's unlikely a parent is going to be there at the exact moment a kid is faced with a moral choice.

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by waiflywaif

But why wouldn't they have a parent to help guide them through it without homeschooling? Unless you're thinking about boarding school, parents are around during the school years!

Even with homeschool, kids are going to reach a point (hopefully) where they go and do things alone or with a peer group. It's unlikely a parent is going to be there at the exact moment a kid is faced with a moral choice.

True, but the people arguing that kids *need* to go to school don't seem to think that. They're presenting school as 1. the only place kids will be exposed to bullying/sex/drugs/mean people/discipline and 2. a place where kids have to learn to deal with those things alone.

[Callimom]

Originally Posted by waiflywaif

But why wouldn't they have a parent to help guide them through it without homeschooling? Unless you're thinking about boarding school, parents are around during the school years!

Even with homeschool, kids are going to reach a point (hopefully) where they go and do things alone or with a peer group. It's unlikely a parent is going to be there at the exact moment a kid is faced with a moral choice.

I really like this Thoreau quote:
The more slowly trees grow first, the sounder they are at the core, and I think the same is true for human beings. and it speaks to what I think homeschooling does for my kids. It allows them time and space to grow as kids within our family's values rather than a peer or culture centered environment and so gives them a very solid core. I think that school can easily compromise the time and connection that parents and kids share. Many mindful parents and lucky kids can overcome it - but for the most part I think that's the exception rather than the norm.

By the time my kids get to the point that they are doing things on their own they will have had hours and hours of guidance from me that their schooled peers won't have had with their parents. I'm not worried about being there at the exact moment because I will have been there to help them think through situations and to guide them for so many more moments before that.

[waiflywaif]

I'm not worried about being there at the exact moment because I will have been there to help them think through situations and to guide them for so many more moments before that.

Cool. I feel the exact same way.

[Brittany93]

um, all these statements are what's WRONG with school imo, when I see kids like this at my school it drives me nuts!

[Callimom]

Originally Posted by waiflywaif

Cool. I feel the exact same way.

And hopefully you and your kids will be the exception rather than the norm.
Karen

[Brittany93]

Originally Posted by LovemyBoo

Here's what I'd say.

"I was made fun of and it made me a better person"

Sarcastic - That's highly debatable.

Serious - So you really suggest making fun of kids to make them better people? Is that in the parenting handbook? I'll risk it my way.

"You can't shelter your kid- they need conflict"

You're sending your kids to school so they can fight? Seriously, school does not corner the market on conflict. My hs'd kids are getting lessons in conflict resolution all the time.

"So what if they have a few bad teachers, everyone in this world isn't nice, and they need to be exposed to that"

Because the rest of the world is filled with sunshine and rainbows. Honestly, do people even hear themselves? There are no difficult people outside of school?



"School will teach them discipline- when to be quiet, when to focus on work, etc"

Discipline? I suppose they'll need it after all the teasing and fighting. Thank you for insinuating that I'm a terrible parent who's children are going to turn into wild animals without the help of the school system.

"Sex and boys and drugs are a part of adolescence- they are going to go crazy in the real world" (like being in school is really depicting a real world situation, )

So let me get this straight. Your reasons for sending children to school are so they can get teased, tease others, fight with each other, have sex and do drugs, so they can all get a good helping of that character-saving discipline? Really??

Yeah. I'll take my chances and screw them up myself, thankyouverymuch.

The logic, it baffles.

Well said.

[waiflywaif]

And hopefully you and your kids will be the exception rather than the norm.

I hope the same for you.

[Callimom]

Originally Posted by waiflywaif

I hope the same for you.

I'm perfectly fine if my kids are the norm among their homeschooled peers. I've yet to meet one who has to define him or herself through the use of drugs, sex, rebellion, bullying etc. Unfortunately the same can't be said for schooled kids I know.

[waiflywaif]

I just meant that I hope they get through the teen years okay. No matter the type of schooling, we just can't predict---we all do the best we can.

Unfortunately I have met homeschooled kids who act out in self-destructive ways. I don't have enough information to know if it's the "norm"---but I agree it's probably not.

[lovbeingamommy]

***show segment wasn't on on hs sorry mamas***

[freestyler]

Yep, I think we've all heard this stupid argument. It is just like the OP said, total cr*p.

[SagMom]

Originally Posted by waiflywaif

But why wouldn't they have a parent to help guide them through it without homeschooling? Unless you're thinking about boarding school, parents are around during the school years!

Here, school runs from 8:45 until 3:15, M-F. So parents AREN'T there. While there IS a teacher with the children, it's far from 1:1 and lots goes on that the teachers never see. When my son was in school, he was given the advice to "stay away from" the bully on the playground. Had I been there, I would have tried to figure out what the issue was, introduce some problem-solving ideas, or at the very least, re-direct. There weren't any tools given to the kids having trouble with this boy, other than the reminder that, if there was a fight, both parties would be in trouble.

That's only one example, but it was typical of how the school "helped" the kids to navigate tricky situations. I believe this is partly due to the large number of kids that a small number of adults is responsible for.

Even with homeschool, kids are going to reach a point (hopefully) where they go and do things alone or with a peer group. It's unlikely a parent is going to be there at the exact moment a kid is faced with a moral choice.

Right. But when they're young, it's likely that a parent IS around. It's also likely that group settings include a higher ratio of trusted adultss than the typical school situation does. So, there's more support and assistance and the kids move away from that gradually.

[Cekimon]

I can really relate to the OP because whenever I mention hs to friends, family, fellow parents... I get the usual one-liners. I try not to get too offended because I know they have not done the homework or research and in some cases, even an educator I know said she may have a different view on public schools if she lived in my county.

Anyhow... I can really relate to almost everything the OP said in her post. It's frustrating for sure.

I live in an area though where there's so much violence and the schools are so bad that most people give me a little credit for considering an alternative... but I still get a lot of those comments and do my best to combat them.

[Leta]

This thread is reminding me of this hilarious one cell comic that I remember from the paper a few years ago...

Caption: "Emily's homeschooling parents try to re-create the typical classroom experience for their daughter."

Art: Parents and daughter all sitting at desks, daughter trying to concentrate on a test while both her parents pitch spitwads at her.