So, I haven't finished reading all the replies yet, but I had to post.
OP, each individual thing/incident you mention maybe by itself could
be brushed off especially if you just want to run from it, but put it all together and it's definitely red flags all over the place.
This is how sex abuse happens. It's so very insidious and can seep into our children's lives without us being aware, if we do not pay attention to the oh so subtle signs
. Ten year olds having sex? Five years old acting *sexy*??? I would take that seriously, even if it turns out to be nothing more than a mix-up of terminology, better safe than sorry, because sorry in these instances can mean a child has been harmed.
IMO, somebody in your neighborhood is a sex abuser. All it takes is one person to abuse one child. That child will then *teach* other children and so on and so on. What's more is that it doesn't take an *older* adult or child, a younger child that has suffered abuse will pass that *knowledge* onto older children and that is still abuse. How do I know this? This happened in a neighborhood I lived in and one of the little girls that was a victim went on to have sex with other kids in the 4th and 5th grade. That is NOT HEALTHY OR NORMAL.
Even if it has not risen to the level of physical contact, exposure to sexual images or language is abusive because it sets a child up for the next step and the next...
I felt physically sick reading some of the posts about what is happening in our neighborhoods. If somebody gives you the creeps, please please listen to that voice!!
There is a very good reason we get those feelings and it is for the protection of ourselves and our family.
Please do not turn your back on this and pretend it's not there- it won't go away, trust me. All of our children desperately need for all of us to keep a sharp eye out for these kinds of behaviors and see it for what it is. Dismissing it as, oh, it's just an older sibling or older neighborhood child they overheard talking or it's too much tv. There's a reason why you posted beyond having to have that conversation with your lo. It's because this bothered you on a deep level and that little voice inside you is speaking truth- please listen. If we listen to those truths and speak them, it is the only real chance we have to successfully combat abuse.
ETA: You don't necessarily have to call the school or cps, but I would listen and watch very
carefully so you can protect your son. If you haven't already, I highly suggest reading Protecting the Gift.
Also, a lot of people dismissed what was happening in that neighborhood I mentioned because the signs were very similar to what the OP describes and sort of under the radar. But the end result was many, many children being hurt and no one listening for a very long time. There is a difference between healthy age-appropriate sexual information and children exhibiting sexualized behavior such as the OP has described.
And, spicyrock, do you know for certain that none of the children involved had been abused and instigated it? Because what you describe is often a common way for sex abuse to spread among children. It would also be very common for the child that was abused to be pointing the finger at someone else and saying quite loudly it was you and not him/her.
Once more edit: my apologies for being so lengthy and verbose.