Originally Posted by Beanjeepin
Thank you for this thread. My #1 was high needs, #2 wasn't but I'm not as scared about the after birth part as I should be. (Although almost a month ago right after I found out it was twins I watched a woman carry a 14 month old into preschool to pick up her other child and I was so jealous it was only one and so simple for her.)
I'm so scared about the pregnancy and birth. Every damned time I turn around there's something that's not going to go as planned with a singleton. I feel badly for not being appreciative for what we've got and thrilled (and people who find out are about shocked that I'm not beside myself with joy) but the logistics of it all are overwhelming. I'm still in mourning over the loss of knowing what's going on based on having two births before - this all feels new for me, like a first pregnancy again. Silly, but true.
I'm actually considering counseling and the midwives think it's a good idea to at least meet with a counselor before the babies come. I have a strong history of depressive types mental illness in my family and have escaped PPD twice now, but this time it may not be so. They think at least meeting with someone before the birth may make it easier post-birth if I need to see someone. It's something we're all keeping a very, very close eye on this time around.
Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. It really does help me to know that I am not the only one going through this. And I totally agree, I feel like a first time mother all over again. The unknown is what is causing me the most stress I think. Just not knowing what to expect is scary.
Anyway, I also think that a counselor may help you too. I have had two visits so far and it is so nice to be able to talk about my feelings without judgement. We set up some goals for my progress and I am really excited about working towards feeling better instead of staying in the same place.
Thanks again for your post.