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The depression about this is overwhelming at times... - Page 2

post #21 of 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by nummies View Post
Thank you all again for all the responses. It is nice to read through them when I am having a down moment.

I had a therapy visit yesterday and it went great. I really like the doctor and feel that I made a great decision! It was great to be able to talk about my feelings.
Glad to hear it.

Taking care of ourselves can be really hard, but we need to do it.

I'm having an up day today because the cleaners came yesterday. We can only afford to have them in every four weeks, and I am amazed at how much of an impact it has on my mood. The week after they come is always completely different from the week before.
post #22 of 28
Thank you for this thread. My #1 was high needs, #2 wasn't but I'm not as scared about the after birth part as I should be. (Although almost a month ago right after I found out it was twins I watched a woman carry a 14 month old into preschool to pick up her other child and I was so jealous it was only one and so simple for her.)

I'm so scared about the pregnancy and birth. Every damned time I turn around there's something that's not going to go as planned with a singleton. I feel badly for not being appreciative for what we've got and thrilled (and people who find out are about shocked that I'm not beside myself with joy) but the logistics of it all are overwhelming. I'm still in mourning over the loss of knowing what's going on based on having two births before - this all feels new for me, like a first pregnancy again. Silly, but true.

I'm actually considering counseling and the midwives think it's a good idea to at least meet with a counselor before the babies come. I have a strong history of depressive types mental illness in my family and have escaped PPD twice now, but this time it may not be so. They think at least meeting with someone before the birth may make it easier post-birth if I need to see someone. It's something we're all keeping a very, very close eye on this time around.
post #23 of 28
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beanjeepin View Post
Thank you for this thread. My #1 was high needs, #2 wasn't but I'm not as scared about the after birth part as I should be. (Although almost a month ago right after I found out it was twins I watched a woman carry a 14 month old into preschool to pick up her other child and I was so jealous it was only one and so simple for her.)

I'm so scared about the pregnancy and birth. Every damned time I turn around there's something that's not going to go as planned with a singleton. I feel badly for not being appreciative for what we've got and thrilled (and people who find out are about shocked that I'm not beside myself with joy) but the logistics of it all are overwhelming. I'm still in mourning over the loss of knowing what's going on based on having two births before - this all feels new for me, like a first pregnancy again. Silly, but true.

I'm actually considering counseling and the midwives think it's a good idea to at least meet with a counselor before the babies come. I have a strong history of depressive types mental illness in my family and have escaped PPD twice now, but this time it may not be so. They think at least meeting with someone before the birth may make it easier post-birth if I need to see someone. It's something we're all keeping a very, very close eye on this time around.
Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. It really does help me to know that I am not the only one going through this. And I totally agree, I feel like a first time mother all over again. The unknown is what is causing me the most stress I think. Just not knowing what to expect is scary.

Anyway, I also think that a counselor may help you too. I have had two visits so far and it is so nice to be able to talk about my feelings without judgement. We set up some goals for my progress and I am really excited about working towards feeling better instead of staying in the same place.

Thanks again for your post.
post #24 of 28
I was pretty overwhelmed when I found out we were expecting twins. My boys required a lot of work, and I couldn't imagine adding two more on top of them. I remember thinking at times that it would be nice if I'd just miscarry one (now, I'm horrified at the thought, but I was just so overwhelmed). You will make it. It will be crazy for awhile, but you will enjoy being a twin mom, too. It's still a lot of work (my twins are almost 3), but it's better than it was, and they really are a lot of fun. We've thought about having another child, but we're afraid to end up with two more, so that has affected our outlook.
post #25 of 28
Looks like this thread really hit a nerve!

While I wasn't as scared during the pregnancy, the anxiety and stress of having two babies (and being a new mom) were overwhelming for me. My docs prescribed Zoloft but I refused it because I was bfing.

What I thought was 'baby blues' lingered, and we started calling it PPD. At 9 months I started seeing a therapist, and I did go on anti-depressants. I felt like a HUGE failure as a mom.

The happy ending: the meds and therapy are amazing. I wish I'd gone on meds a long time ago (like 20 years!!) but I gave in to the stigma. I didn't want to be 'crazy.' But now I finally feel normal, I have energy again, and I'm even gaining confidence as a mom.

Good for you for seeing a therapist. I just wanted to share my experience, because I always benefit from reading everyone elses. Maybe now that I'm feeling better I'll be back on these boards more often...

hugs to all!
post #26 of 28
Leslie, what a nice suprise to see you on the boards, and I'm so glad that you have found what works for you. It takes so much to be a mom of multiples, and everyone is different as to what will work for them, and I'm so glad to hear that you found what works for you. HUG!!!! (and hope to see you more often!)
post #27 of 28
For those of you that have had therapy/counseling...how did you go about finding the right provider? I'm looking for someone that can address the pregnancy/birth and newborn fears. I was also wondering if anyone went to counseling with their dh? We both have concerns, and definately some are about the stress on the marriage, but I'm not sure whether individual counseling (much cheaper since covered by insurance somewhat) would be sufficient or if we need to shell out the big bucks for couples counseling (not covered). Any advice?
post #28 of 28
You feeling are valid and you shouldn't feel any pressure to feel anything but what you are feeling. Our twins are now 17 months and I have to admit the first year was a challenge. I had the gift of my mother who spent a lot of time here helping out & if you can get some help - esp in the begining - I would encourage you to do so. As for the lack of sleep, the only way I got through it was finally giving into it and maintaing my sence of humor. I am sure seeing a threapist will help take some of the pressure off and give you some perspective. Good luck and know that they are going to bring you so much joy!! Big hug!
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