Preface: having my first period PP, sick with an awful cough that won't go away, baby is teething and screams all the time
5:00 woken up by baby for the umpteenth time, nurse, only this time she wants to play cause it is light. I have a killer headache and take some painkillers. Eventually baby goes back to sleep and I do too.
9:00 woken up by knock on the door. So glad I got to sleep so late! but remember I'm watching my neighbor's 3 kids while she goes to the dentist. My headache is so bad I am nauseated and can't concentrate. My kids behave well but the neighbor's kids are awful. Drama, chewing up books, throwing toys, etc.
12:00: Swimming lessons for ds and Mommy and Me swimming class for dd1 while my neighbor watches the baby. Best part of the day. I almost forgot my headache
Afternoon: kinda hazy, scrounged up some non-nutritious food for us for lunch, dd needs a nap but won't take one, spent some time laying in the grass outside while the kids played around me.
Late afternoon: okay, now I'm depressed. My brain is fried, I want to eat ice cream instead of making dinner, why won't this headache respond to medication? finally crash with the baby
6:00 baby wakes me up. I hear noises from the kitchen that tell me dh is stressed out but has made dinner and is trying to round up the kids to eat. I try to get up and eat but dd1 NEEDS me, quickly overwhelms me and baby just kicks and screams no matter what I do. Everything's hazy. Can't think. Leave the kids crying in the kitchen and go back to bed
6:30 DH has to go somewhere, leaves a screaming baby next to me on the bed and the kids eating dinner in the kitchen. It takes a while before I care that there is a screaming baby sitting right next to me. Finally I get up, feed the baby some baby food (she actually likes it today) take dd1 to the toilet (impatiently), help both ds and dd1 with dinner, eat some food myself, brain is starting to clear a little
Evening: crazy, I'm totally ineffective with the kids, PLEASE, won't you stay in bed long enough for me to put the baby to bed?
Now: Everything's quiet (Woohoo!) and I can evaluate a little. The day wasn't really THAT awful (reading over that, I can see how many things went well!), just enough factors to make me hit with depression again. It is so discouraging, I'm doing well so much of the time, I know I used to feel depressed every day! But whenever it comes back, I wonder, is my brain permanently damaged? Will I ever heal enough that I am not so susceptible to days like this anymore?
Thanks for the vent. I feel a little better. I'm pretty certain that tomorrow will be much better.
5:00 woken up by baby for the umpteenth time, nurse, only this time she wants to play cause it is light. I have a killer headache and take some painkillers. Eventually baby goes back to sleep and I do too.
9:00 woken up by knock on the door. So glad I got to sleep so late! but remember I'm watching my neighbor's 3 kids while she goes to the dentist. My headache is so bad I am nauseated and can't concentrate. My kids behave well but the neighbor's kids are awful. Drama, chewing up books, throwing toys, etc.
12:00: Swimming lessons for ds and Mommy and Me swimming class for dd1 while my neighbor watches the baby. Best part of the day. I almost forgot my headache
Afternoon: kinda hazy, scrounged up some non-nutritious food for us for lunch, dd needs a nap but won't take one, spent some time laying in the grass outside while the kids played around me.
Late afternoon: okay, now I'm depressed. My brain is fried, I want to eat ice cream instead of making dinner, why won't this headache respond to medication? finally crash with the baby
6:00 baby wakes me up. I hear noises from the kitchen that tell me dh is stressed out but has made dinner and is trying to round up the kids to eat. I try to get up and eat but dd1 NEEDS me, quickly overwhelms me and baby just kicks and screams no matter what I do. Everything's hazy. Can't think. Leave the kids crying in the kitchen and go back to bed
6:30 DH has to go somewhere, leaves a screaming baby next to me on the bed and the kids eating dinner in the kitchen. It takes a while before I care that there is a screaming baby sitting right next to me. Finally I get up, feed the baby some baby food (she actually likes it today) take dd1 to the toilet (impatiently), help both ds and dd1 with dinner, eat some food myself, brain is starting to clear a little
Evening: crazy, I'm totally ineffective with the kids, PLEASE, won't you stay in bed long enough for me to put the baby to bed?
Now: Everything's quiet (Woohoo!) and I can evaluate a little. The day wasn't really THAT awful (reading over that, I can see how many things went well!), just enough factors to make me hit with depression again. It is so discouraging, I'm doing well so much of the time, I know I used to feel depressed every day! But whenever it comes back, I wonder, is my brain permanently damaged? Will I ever heal enough that I am not so susceptible to days like this anymore?
Thanks for the vent. I feel a little better. I'm pretty certain that tomorrow will be much better.
