My dd has a friend come over every other week for a play date. On the week in between, my dd goes there.
I noticed this morning that my dd's name was written on her night table in pen. When I asked her about it, she told me that her friend did it. I believe that the friend did it, but I was upset b/c 1) She didn't try to stop her 2) She hadn't told me about it.
I asked her to clean it up and she said that it wasn't fair b/c she didn't do it. I tried to explain to her that it was her guest that did it and that it was her responsibility to make sure her friends respect her things.
This isn't the first time we've had the conversation. Another time her friend was over, they asked to play in the bedroom. I usually let them play downstairs in the play room, where I can keep an ear and the occasional eye on them.
The first time I let them play upstairs, both girls had trashed the room. Mattress and sheets off the bed, all the books out of the shelves, all shoes out of the closet. They cleaned some of it up together, but my dd had to clean most of it b/c her friend had to go home at a certain time.
The next time she came over, I told them that they couldn't play upstairs unsupervised b/c of what happened before. After a few play dates of being confined to the first floor, they promised they would "do the right thing" and I let them play upstairs again.
Now we have the matter of the writing on the night table. Not sure how to proceed b/c school is ending and the play dates may be more frequent in the summer.
Do I mention it to her mother? Do I go over house rules again? Are they banished to the first floor forever?
BTW, both girls are 5.
I noticed this morning that my dd's name was written on her night table in pen. When I asked her about it, she told me that her friend did it. I believe that the friend did it, but I was upset b/c 1) She didn't try to stop her 2) She hadn't told me about it.
I asked her to clean it up and she said that it wasn't fair b/c she didn't do it. I tried to explain to her that it was her guest that did it and that it was her responsibility to make sure her friends respect her things.
This isn't the first time we've had the conversation. Another time her friend was over, they asked to play in the bedroom. I usually let them play downstairs in the play room, where I can keep an ear and the occasional eye on them.
The first time I let them play upstairs, both girls had trashed the room. Mattress and sheets off the bed, all the books out of the shelves, all shoes out of the closet. They cleaned some of it up together, but my dd had to clean most of it b/c her friend had to go home at a certain time.
The next time she came over, I told them that they couldn't play upstairs unsupervised b/c of what happened before. After a few play dates of being confined to the first floor, they promised they would "do the right thing" and I let them play upstairs again.
Now we have the matter of the writing on the night table. Not sure how to proceed b/c school is ending and the play dates may be more frequent in the summer.
Do I mention it to her mother? Do I go over house rules again? Are they banished to the first floor forever?
BTW, both girls are 5.
