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39 weeks and midwife "not confident": ( - Page 3

post #41 of 70
neither me nor my brother engages until after my mother was in labor... doctors are weird.

its great about the appt tomorrow.. have you posted in FYT?
post #42 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rands View Post
She put the whole "you make babies too big for your pelvis that's why the first one never came down and why this one isn't engaged yet" blah blah blah.
Ah, that's crap! If baby #1 didn't drop, all of those muscles are probably still taut and strong to hold this baby high up until your labour actually begins. I'm sure that's how it works, someone else correct me if I'm wrong.

That whole 'you make babies too big' is such a crap argument, IMO. As women, we are evolving, not the other way around! I hope you get the urgent consult and you find someone who's got a bit more patience and won't hurry you through the revolving c/s door. Keep us posted.
post #43 of 70
: my aunt is barely 5ft tall and very thin she gave birth drug free and rather quickly to me 10lb cousin and his 99th percentile head.
post #44 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rands View Post
Well today was a disappointment. I did refuse an internal exam. Basically the OB said she'd be scheduling me for a section at 41.5 weeks if she had it her way. She put the whole "you make babies too big for your pelvis that's why the first one never came down and why this one isn't engaged yet" blah blah blah.
That is so unfair. I had my last mw appt with Isla the day she was born around 10 am and she was still floating and I was still thick and tight. I started to labour at 9pm and she was born by 2am...totally natural homebirth. I went through so much of what you are going through with my first vbac and it just made me not want my mw's there for most of my labour because they made me feel so pressured. I ended up missing transition (never had been in real labour before and I honestly didn't realize I was in transition) and my DH had to call an ambulance because I started pushing when the mw was still at home...it was still an awesome birth LOL (mw got there just as the ambulance was loading me in and she still delivered).

They kept telling me the same thing...that because DS was so big and his head was so big maybe I just wasn't built for normal delivery. It was total BS and I have managed to deliver 2 babies who weighed less than DS but whose head circumfrence was on 1/2 inch and 1 inch smaller. I think I could have birthed DS just fine too if they had been more patient!

Here are the links to Niamh and Isla's birth stories just to give you hope that it can happen!
http://www.babiesonline.com/journal/...p?be=n/niamhba
http://www.babiesonline.com/journal/...sp?be=i/islaik

Good luck!!

Steph
post #45 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rands View Post
Well today was a disappointment. I did refuse an internal exam. Basically the OB said she'd be scheduling me for a section at 41.5 weeks if she had it her way. She put the whole "you make babies too big for your pelvis that's why the first one never came down and why this one isn't engaged yet" blah blah blah. She wants to book me for induction at 41.5 weeks. She said if the cervix is ripe she'll try foley cathedar (because I suggested it--she said she's not really comfortable with it), then she'd do ROM, or pitocin if I'm "ripe" and the head is low. SHe says 9 of 10 OB's at the hospital would be opposed to letting me even attempt a VBAC if I got that late.
that OB is useless and a manipulative bully. I really hope you have a doula to help you keep your voice during labor.

Quote:
So this afternoon I researched and called the most VBAC friendly hospital in the area. I convinced the birthing department head of my story enough that she went and found the head OB of the hospital and told him my story. The doctor said to have my midwife call tomorrow and schedule me an urgent consult with him in the next few days. Hopefully speaking to him will be more positive. The plan will be that if I go late enough that my midwife wants to transfer me, hopefully she will transfer me to this VBAC friendly OB instead of the other hosptial and OB's....
Don't you have a choice of who go get to transfer to? If the head OB is supportive and willing to accept you, that's where you tell her you're going. What if he comes across as super vbac supportive? Would you consider birthing in that hospital rather than with the MW who is not coming across as remotely supportive of you?

So much about VBAC is tied to a positive mindset; if no one around a mother is truly supportive and willing to let her body do the job it's designed to do then she's heading for a c/s before she's even in labor.
post #46 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rands View Post
Thanks for all the input. Hopefully I go into labour on my own sooner than later and that he moves into position nicely and my cervix becomes more favourable. I'm really nervous about my appointment on Monday which will be approaching my due date. I have an OB consult ready to go for 41 weeks.....ugh.
I think what most of us are trying to say, is the STAFF are being impatient, because you aren't even full term yet! The average baby is born at about 41 wks, 2 days, and many ladies go around 42 weeks just fine. Even VBACs. Remember the physiology, the first two weeks of the pregnancy, you arent even pregnant yet!(According to the usual pregnancy calender) so it doesn't make any sense to scare you needlessly with this stuff you are being told. I think they are trying to railroad you into more surgery, and as long as you are doing fetal kick counts, and staying hydrated, and spending some time on hands and knees each day(to help the baby turn to anterior, if he's posterior) then you should go into labor on your own, and birth your baby your way. Is there a community mw who isn't part of the local status quo? One of the independent midwives? They might be more amenable to waiting til your body is ready for birth. It doesn't appear so yet, nor would I expect it to be! Enjoy the last couple weeks of your pregnancy, it will be over in a flash!
post #47 of 70
To be honest I'm seeing red flags for a great number of things, but most especially for the CPs that you're seeing.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rands View Post
Yeah I don't know what to make of any of it. She's totally supportive of the vbac and was so sad to tell me that news...
My take on this is very different than yours. I'd agree with Pau - nothing about what this mw has said seems the least bit "supportive" to me.

The OB consult seems classic OB bullying to me. I hope you get a better vibe from the other OB b/c tbh, if it were me I'd be looking for a different CP!

Quote:
Originally Posted by ShwarmaQueen View Post
I think it's premature to make that assumption (that you won't get your VBAC). Eat healthy and stay active, make some love. : Labor will come!
Above all this is exactly what I'd say as well!
post #48 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rands View Post
Well today was a disappointment. I did refuse an internal exam. Basically the OB said she'd be scheduling me for a section at 41.5 weeks if she had it her way. She put the whole "you make babies too big for your pelvis that's why the first one never came down and why this one isn't engaged yet" blah blah blah. She wants to book me for induction at 41.5 weeks. She said if the cervix is ripe she'll try foley cathedar (because I suggested it--she said she's not really comfortable with it), then she'd do ROM, or pitocin if I'm "ripe" and the head is low. SHe says 9 of 10 OB's at the hospital would be opposed to letting me even attempt a VBAC if I got that late.

So this afternoon I researched and called the most VBAC friendly hospital in the area. I convinced the birthing department head of my story enough that she went and found the head OB of the hospital and told him my story. The doctor said to have my midwife call tomorrow and schedule me an urgent consult with him in the next few days. Hopefully speaking to him will be more positive. The plan will be that if I go late enough that my midwife wants to transfer me, hopefully she will transfer me to this VBAC friendly OB instead of the other hosptial and OB's....
So, you are under the care of a Registered Midwife in Canada. It does not surprise me a bit all your story.
I am so sorry you have to undergo this whole stressful situation, dealing with easy-knife OBs, with this double speech midwifery care seems to have. How can somebody offer artificial induction to a scarred uterus just because you get to the 41+5 ?
Baby too big? Come on!!
I don’t think that midwife has you best interest on her heart. She has to follow rules, and it looks like part of those rules is to induce a healthy woman just because she is on her 41st weak. She is just “doing her job” with no consideration to your particular situation, to the singular and unique circumstances of your pregnancy.
You don’t deserve this. You should be enjoying the last days of your pregnancy, receiving loving care, being reassured that if baby is fine, you just have to wait until the moment arrives.
The only thing I can suggest is to contact the local ICAN group in Toronto. Although you are not there, may be they could help you
I’ll pm you the contact info I have of them.
All the best.
post #49 of 70
Thread Starter 
Thanks so much for that information!
post #50 of 70
I would forget whether or not the MW can transfer you to the 2nd OB. See that OB, transfer your care to him/her. You would be better off with a supportive OB, then an unsupportive MW. Go across the border and give your baby and your body the best bet. You deserve a "trial of labor". Your baby deserves a vaginal birth.

What a godsend it would be to get into this OB, and a more supportive environment. Also, USA has this thing called the EMTALA act. I read about this when I was going to transfer from a planned UP/UC, and I had PROM, then meconium. The baby was active and doing great. She was great when we got there. I had this paper that speaks about the EMTALA. It basically says that no one can force you into surgery, and that the hospitals are more scared of being accused of going against the EMTALA than malpractice suits.

So, you go to this new OB, you go over there when your labor is established, and NEVER sign the paper that speaks about Csections (even for that JIC), unless there is a true emergency. At that point, you or your DH can sign quickly.

I have mentioned this before. The EDD is just a number. I have successfully birthed 6 babies VBAC. The 1st was 23 days late, the second 10 days late, the 3rd on her due date (did "natural" inductions at home that caused her issues), 4th was 26 *gasp* days late and PERFECTLY healthy and bigger than my other late babies, 5th was 23 days late with PROM for 3 days and mec and did great, and the 6th was 15 days late, and a real peanut. But, I lost a twin with him really early on. I have lost a twin with this one, and going back to traditional prenatal care, so I don't expect to be so late again.

With my first late baby, they did NSTs, and now they can do bioprofiles, and if these tests come back fine, then you can still gestate. There are so many women that birthed bigger babies than when they were sectioned. It wasn't so much fun for me, when I had my 9.5 lb baby, when my other late ones were only 7.75 lbs. But, since he was born in the water, I didn't have any issues at all. I craved a lot of sugar with him, so now I restrict my sugar after 5th month, and my 15 day late baby was only 7 lbs even. What a little peanut!! LOL Kymberli
post #51 of 70
Thread Starter 
i did it! no drugs, no hospital, 1 stitch!! 8'4", 23 inches long
post #52 of 70
Quote:
i did it! no drugs, no hospital, 1 stitch!! 8'4", 23 inches long
:
post #53 of 70
Awesome!

Congrats! Take that "not confident!"


Enjoy your babymoon!
post #54 of 70
Woohoo! Wheres the birth story and pics?
post #55 of 70
::::::


CONGRATS MAMA!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rands View Post
i did it! no drugs, no hospital, 1 stitch!! 8'4", 23 inches long
post #56 of 70
congratulations!!! :
post #57 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rands View Post
i did it! no drugs, no hospital, 1 stitch!! 8'4", 23 inches long
Yay!!!! I am soooo happy for you! Congratulations and enjoy your babymoon!

Steph
post #58 of 70
Yay! Congratulations! Can;t wait to read the whole story. Enjoy the babymoon!
post #59 of 70
Yay!!! YOU ROCK, MAMA! Enjoy your baby!
post #60 of 70
Awesome!!!

Cannot wait to read your birth story!
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