Tribe for bedresters and high risk pregnancies - Page 12

[preciousstone]

wwyd - baby shower 2.5 hrs away at 34 wks

Is this a no brainer? I am so conflicted about going to my baby shower. All our family live in ny - 2.5hrs away from where we live. If we have the baby shower where we live, I'm afraid only a couple people would come... is that silly thing to worry about?

If we did go to ny, I'm thinking I would lay in the backseat the whole way and we'd only stay for the day. Keep in mind I've been on bedrest since 21wks after I got an emergency cerclage - I now have only 1cm cervix. Am I totally nuts to even consider this? DH who has been crazy careful about everything doesn't see the harm and I really dont have an answer for why it would be bad.. except it just doesn't seem safe.

WWYD?

[zejh]

Originally Posted by preciousstone

Is this a no brainer? I am so conflicted about going to my baby shower. All our family live in ny - 2.5hrs away from where we live. If we have the baby shower where we live, I'm afraid only a couple people would come... is that silly thing to worry about?

If we did go to ny, I'm thinking I would lay in the backseat the whole way and we'd only stay for the day. Keep in mind I've been on bedrest since 21wks after I got an emergency cerclage - I now have only 1cm cervix. Am I totally nuts to even consider this? DH who has been crazy careful about everything doesn't see the harm and I really dont have an answer for why it would be bad.. except it just doesn't seem safe.

WWYD?

As far as a bit of travel goes, dh and I took a trip a few hours away a few weeks ago, when I was almost 24 weeks, and it worked out just fine, even though if anything had happened while we were there, I would've probably needed a helicopter ride back into the city (or a 60 minute ambulance ride to a hospital that probably would've needed to transfer me, anyway...) But, nothing happened, and it was a very nice week, during which I mostly was lying down, but it was lying down watching the ocean instead of lying down watching the tree across the street...

That said, as for the shower itself, I can't really comment, since I was relieved when I realized that the whole high risk/bed rest thing means I'm off the hook for having a baby shower--I was mostly dreading the idea since we live in a rather small apartment for now, and I don't want to end up with too much stuff, though I wouldn't want most of that stuff even if we were living in a big house...

One thing my mom and I were discussing, though, was having a homecoming party for the baby after we're all home and safe. There's a good chance the baby could be premature, so I'm thinking this would really be more meaningful as well as easier to plan in my case.

[Neldavi]

I wouldn't do it. But I know that car rides are stressful for me anyway, and the bouncing of the car can bring on contractions for me. Also, I gave birth to my daughter prematurely a few hours after my baby shower, so I'm superstitious about it.

I think a homecoming party is an excellent idea. Have the baby shower at your house .. small can be nice, anyway, and then plan on a coming-home party once you and the baby are settled.

I wanted to add that I'm going to be 34 weeks around Christmas time and I'm already telling family that I'm just not doing Christmas this year. Too stressful, I'll probably just be in bed. We'll get a tree and do stuff for the kids at home, but I'm not going anywhere and I don't want anyone coming to my house either. They all understand, it's just one year. That's just me, though.

[justmandy]

Originally Posted by preciousstone

Is this a no brainer? I am so conflicted about going to my baby shower. All our family live in ny - 2.5hrs away from where we live. If we have the baby shower where we live, I'm afraid only a couple people would come... is that silly thing to worry about?

If we did go to ny, I'm thinking I would lay in the backseat the whole way and we'd only stay for the day. Keep in mind I've been on bedrest since 21wks after I got an emergency cerclage - I now have only 1cm cervix. Am I totally nuts to even consider this? DH who has been crazy careful about everything doesn't see the harm and I really dont have an answer for why it would be bad.. except it just doesn't seem safe.

WWYD?

I wouldn't do it...I don't think. I had to miss my sister's wedding last week, it was 6 hours away so a bit different, but I know about making hard decisions like this. It's not so much the drive, which may cause complications, but the shower itself that would be the hardest, I think. I don't know how you are, but I can't sit up for very long with out contracting...and you'd be seeing so many people you want to catch up with, I think it would be hard to find a way to go rest.

I don't think it's too much to ask ppl to come 2.5 hours at all and if that just really won't work, I love the idea of a homecoming.

That's just my oppinion, though, you know your situation far better then I do. Have you talked to your ob about it?

[zejh]

Originally Posted by Neldavi

...

I wanted to add that I'm going to be 34 weeks around Christmas time and I'm already telling family that I'm just not doing Christmas this year. Too stressful, I'll probably just be in bed. We'll get a tree and do stuff for the kids at home, but I'm not going anywhere and I don't want anyone coming to my house either. They all understand, it's just one year. That's just me, though.

If I'm still pregnant then, I'll be 39 weeks on Christmas Day, so right from the start I knew I wasn't doing anything for Christmas, even if I'd had a completely uneventful pregnancy. That said, my parents are coming for Thanksgiving, though that'll certainly be very low key, especially if I'm still in the hospital.

Oh, and I forgot to mention, I've already missed one cousin's wedding back in July (it was a few weeks after my last bleeding episode) and I'll be missing another cousin's wedding in a week, so it's been a bit of a bummer, though the first wedding did make for a convenient excuse to tell that side of the family that I was pregnant...

[dani76]

Well I had my 39 week appt today, and I'm 6cm dilated. We talked about it, and decided to go in tomorrow morning to have my water broken. DD's birth was 2 hours, and I live 30 minutes from the hospital. So it just makes sense not to chance an unassisted delivery that I am not prepared for. I seriously laughed while the OB was checking me. It figures with all of the PTL/meds that I would be so far along and walking around at 6 cm. LOL

Please think smooth and not too fast labor vibes for me tomorrow!

[preciousstone]

awesome news!! wishing u a peaceful delivery

[chel]

so glad to hear of so many successful stories.
after 2 loss, where my body wouldn't let go, I now have a healthy baby and a body that's ready to go!
I'm 23w and only have 1.3cm of a cervix that is funneling. I just found out yesterday at my level ? u/s, that was optional, but suggested due to my age. I just went ahead with it out of concern for the baby since my last 2 m/c were blighted ovum and usually due to chromosome issues.
I'm on total best rest.
The specialist didn't really say much besides that I need to come back Tuesday.
Can't wait to hear more good stories!

[preciousstone]

Originally Posted by chel

so glad to hear of so many successful stories.
after 2 loss, where my body wouldn't let go, I now have a healthy baby and a body that's ready to go!
I'm 23w and only have 1.3cm of a cervix that is funneling. I just found out yesterday at my level ? u/s, that was optional, but suggested due to my age. I just went ahead with it out of concern for the baby since my last 2 m/c were blighted ovum and usually due to chromosome issues.
I'm on total best rest.
The specialist didn't really say much besides that I need to come back Tuesday.
Can't wait to hear more good stories!

did docs consider you for an emergent cerclage in addition to bedrest? something to consider...

[chel]

Originally Posted by preciousstone

did docs consider you for an emergent cerclage in addition to bedrest? something to consider...

after reading your story, I'm strongly considering it.
I kinda feel the doc didn't think I would last the weekend. Just the potential for hospitalization was the only other suggestion. I think the only reason I got out of that is due to my dd's age. So far it's been 2 days since my last bh type contraction.

[preciousstone]

Originally Posted by chel

after reading your story, I'm strongly considering it.
I kinda feel the doc didn't think I would last the weekend. Just the potential for hospitalization was the only other suggestion. I think the only reason I got out of that is due to my dd's age. So far it's been 2 days since my last bh type contraction.

hmmm... my docs didn't think i'd make it 1 day! from the moment they saw i only had 5mm cervix NO ONE would even let me stand up. i was on a stretcher the whole time. they allowed me to go home and do the cerclage the next day but told me to lay flat all day and night and take a sponge bath - NO SHOWER. it's your decision but i think there is something of a short window after which they cannot put a cerclage anymore and it might be around 24 wks.. am not sure.

i suspect your doc doesn't believe you have IC (incompetent cervix) because your history of loss is not due to IC - same as me.. i've never had ANY losses. and my docs basically were saying to me - well if you had lost a baby due to IC we would recommend a cerclage but your short cervix could be due to something else - and my thoughts were.. so let me see.. you'd like to wait and see if my baby dies first! then next time around you'll know what to do?!!! They mentioned it as an option, nonetheless; but they expressed no real confidence it would work. I saw one of the mfm's who placed the cerclage a few weeks later and she was shocked to see me still pregnant. she gave me a big hug.

I digress!

there is a great forum for just for us ladies with short cervix issues http://ic.hobh.org/forums/index.php. you can post there and see what others may say. i suspect most of the experienced short cervix mamas would encourage you to consider the cerclage.. but you'll find better info and feedback there.

[joates]

Originally Posted by preciousstone

i suspect your doc doesn't believe you have IC (incompetent cervix) because your history of loss is not due to IC - same as me.. i've never had ANY losses. and my docs basically were saying to me - well if you had lost a baby due to IC we would recommend a cerclage but your short cervix could be due to something else - and my thoughts were.. so let me see.. you'd like to wait and see if my baby dies first! then next time around you'll know what to do?!!! They mentioned it as an option, nonetheless; but they expressed no real confidence it would work. I saw one of the mfm's who placed the cerclage a few weeks later and she was shocked to see me still pregnant. she gave me a big hug.

I am also on bed rest for a cerclage, mine is preventative, I had a loss @ 20 weeks, and everyone thinks it is definitely classic IC. I delivered my sweet baby girl with no pain, I didn't think anything was wrong until I started spotting and five minutes later my water broke. Literally no warning, so now this baby is on lock down and hopefully it will work. I will be 15 weeks on Monday and was scared of this surgery, but I know I would rather have this cerclage and lots of bed rest instead of another loss, even though bed rest is a killer and I've only done it for about a week.

[dani76]

The birth story will be short, she came in just 45 minutes! Charlotte James was born at 12:46am on 9/26 and weighed in at 9 pounds 14 ounces. I'll update more later.

[preciousstone]

Originally Posted by dani76

The birth story will be short, she came in just 45 minutes! Charlotte James was born at 12:46am on 9/26 and weighed in at 9 pounds 14 ounces. I'll update more later.

congrats mama! what a pretty name!!!

[girlzmommy00]

Congratulations on the new babies!! I hope everyone is doing well & home soon.

I haven't been around due to a hospital stay for 6 days. Thankfully the baby is doing great and the FFN at 24 weeks was negative. I'm 25 weeks now. Turns out on top of all my other issues & stinky past history, I seem to have some type of GI problem. I have severe upper abdominal pain & a lot of vomiting. So they had me in the hospital to keep an eye on both the baby & I. They aren't positive it's an ulcer since they can't do more testing but it's looking like that's probably the issue.

I was doing a little better but my insurance is dragging their feet approving the medication I need to keep the ulcer issue under control. If I can't get it today or tomorrow, I'm going to have to go back to the hospital. Just frustrating when your insurance is what's making you sick. The medication is $300 otherwise I'd just pay for it myself.

I've been bumped up to more frequent visits with the OB, high risk dr, plus I also have to see the GI dr and cardiologist (checking that end of things due to the pains in that general area). But as long as the baby stays put & is growing well, we're good.

They're also starting the fluid checks since my last 2 pregnancies were induced early (one at 33 weeks and one at 37 weeks) due to low fluid. So far it's good but in the past, it didn't start looking low until I hit the 3rd trimester/27-28 weeks so while it's good that it's not low now, in the past my fluid levels were good around 25 weeks but shortly after started to drop.

[zejh]

Congrats to dani76!

I had my first check-up yesterday with the high-risk ob as my primary ob. I've been seeing the guy most of the summer at my ultrasound appointments, but now I don't have to deal with the middleman (well, woman), which in and of itself is just a big relief. The regular ob I was seeing just always rubbed me the wrong way--I couldn't quite put a finger on it.

The ultrasound showed a couple of things that are going in the right direction. The main thing is that fluid is still low, but not as low as it was 2 weeks ago, which was better than 2 weeks before that. So, hopefully, this is a real trend, and my fluid is slowly increasing. And, of course, hopefully, there's been enough over the past how many weeks for lung development... *sigh*

Anyhow, another good thing is that the baby's growth seems to be accelerating. 4 weeks ago, it was 20th percentile, 2 weeks ago it was 33rd percentile, and the doctor didn't tell us specifically this time, though he said growth was good, but dh noticed on the ultrasound that the head measurement was 80th percentile, so I may be getting one of my family's typical big babies, afterall.

Let's see... Another thing is that the fibroid, which has been sitting over the cervix, seems to be moving up, and the baby moving to where the fibroid was. It's not clear if the baby will be in a position to birth vaginally yet (I'm 26 weeks) but if the trend continues, I'm hoping it might at least mean that they could do a c-section with a low transverse incision rather than a high classical incision, which would be an improvement. (The doctor would like to be able to have the birth be the least risk possible for future pregnancies, and right now the problem is just where everything has been positioned just doesn't allow for much.)

The doctor hasn't been particularly optimistic, but I guess he doesn't want our expectations too high. At any rate, right now the baby has a good heartbeat every time, and I can feel the baby moving every day. One thing that's a little better is that before he'd said he'd want me to check into the hospital by 30 weeks, and now he says by 32 weeks, though I need to check my temperature twice a day to make sure I don't have a fever, and call him if it reaches 100. This morning I was at 97.5... (I rarely get up to 98.6, so I think if I get much above 99, I'll give a call, just to be safe.)

(Oh, and I didn't get the steroid shot, so I guess he doesn't think I need it yet.)

So, yeah... I try to be realistically optimistic--I'm not going to think too much about the worst case scenario of the baby's lungs not having enough fluid to develop, but I also can't pretend there's nothing to worry about. Overall, I've been in a pretty decent mood, though, and I have friends and family and a wonderful husband supporting me... We'll see how things work out, I guess.

[Amandamarie]

Just a quick update

I'm still pregnant. A little over 38 weeks by my dates. Almost 39 weeks by dr's u/s. My mom stayed for 1 1/2 weeks, but had to go home and back to work. I've been having early labor signs for almost 2 weeks. 36 weeks was too early, but now that it's 38 weeks, I'm begging him to come out. My body is ready, but he's not.
Trying to staying calm, but finding it challenging. The cerclage and 21 weeks of bed rest kept him in and now that I'm very close, there's still fear that something will go wrong.
I have a dr's appt today, so hoping for more progress.

[Amandamarie]

Dani76- Congrats! I'm so happy for you. Wow, that is a quick labor.

Zejh- That's great you got some positive news. Your baby is growing and you're getting lots of support. Glad you switched dr's. It does make a big difference.

girlzmommy- Glad your baby is doing well. Sorry about the Gi stuff. I hope the insurance gets sorted out and they pay for the meds.

Joates- I lost 2nd dd at 18 weeks due to IC. I had a cerclage put in at 13 1/2 weeks and was on bed rest for 4 months. It's not easy, but doable. I took it a week at a time. It was very scarey, but so worth it.

Preciousstone- I would have the baby shower at home. Too risky with a short cervix. Even if only a few people can make it, it still can be a wonderful celebration.
I know what you mean about the let's wait and see approach. Through a mix-up I had a consult with the head research guy of the Peri department. He was so condescending and went over my history. He didn't believe I had IC and wanted to do the wait and see approach. I told him this was my last baby and I wasn't taking any chances. Thankfully, my peri and OB who were there when I lost my dd and diagnosed classic IC, thought he was totally wrong. They both believed I needed the cerclage and sure enough noticed my cervix already looked abnormal when they did the surgery.


No changes. Still 3 cm dialated. My dr thinks the cerclage caused some scarring in my cervix. She said to keep walking to put pressure on it. She offered to schedule an induction for next week, but I declined. Unless he's in distress, I'll just have to wait it out. My dh wants me to schedule it because of the HG, but since my belly is growing and I put on a few lbs despite eating very little, I'm going to put it off a little longer. My first dd was born at 39 weeks, so I'm really hoping by Sunday, I'll go into labor on my own.

[chel]

Preciousstone - thanks for recommending the IC board. Lots of great info.

Zejh hey ddc gal.

so nice to see so many on here making it to term. For those at the end or close, is there anything you wish you would have done to prepare?
I don't even have any maternity clothes, let alone anything (but several dozen prefolds) for the baby.

I guess packing a hospital bag for a hospital bedrest stay should be on my to-do list. Though I guess right now I can just have someone pack up everything within 3ft of my bed and that would cover most of my needs

at my appt this week I was told I'm too far along for a cerclage. I'm now on prog supp. and will continue on bedrest till the end with weekly CL checks

[Zevy]

Hi ladies. I usually post on the Feb 2010 board, but was told there was a tribe for bed rest ladies. And here you are.

I am currently 20.5 weeks pregnant with g/g twins. I have a toddler who is 20 months or so, a wonderful little boy.

This has been a very...eventful pregnancy. I had three serious episodes of severe bleeding early on. I had an early anatomy scan and everything looked fine. However, I had a second one yesterday to check out the hearts in greater detail and found that my cervix was already funneled and dynamic: it keeps changing length. We had noticed that at my 13 week ultrasound (during which I was bleeding) so my peri has been waiting for this to happen.

I was immediately sent home on bed rest. I work full time, but I couldn't even go back to work to pick up my personal belongings. I am now on STD. I have another peri appointment in two weeks, and another u/s in four weeks. They will admit me to the hospital then for steroid shots and observation. I am going on progesterone tomorrow.

I will not be having a cerclage because they are not recommended for twins, and my peri thinks it will just irritate my already irritated uterus: she thinks all this is due to all the bleeding I had early on.

So I am now home. I can shower daily but have to limit my activity: no cooking other than something simple, no cleaning/laundry, etc. No leaving the house except for my appointments. We have a nanny, so my son will be ok during the day, but my husband will be taking over all childcare during the evenings/weekends, as well as all household chores.

I've already been making lists of what needs to be done and when and how to get through the next month...I'm taking it two weeks at a time.

As a positive: both girls are doing great.

I'd like to say 'welcome me', but of course none of us would like to be here, LOL! But any advice, support would be welcome and I can offer mine as well.

Nice to meet you. And I'm in Boston, if any of you are in that general area.