i am so angry

[StrongFeather]

I called my boss to tell her that I really shouldn't work tonight. I told her I have a hernia, and she just called me back and basically made me feel bad about it and bullied me to come in tonight. She was like "listen I am stuck" Well, so am I. I am 6 months pregnant, I just gained 4 pounds since my last shift and I can't really do anything that is considered strenuous. So waiting tables is SO NOT A GOOD IDEA. I feel bullied, I feel like I have no choice but to go in. They owe me last weeks pay. I feel like such a wuss for not standing up for myself, and my baby.

what to do.

[2boyzmama]

You waitress? Is it possible for you to switch to hostessing instead? Or can you run the register at take-out? She can't MAKE you come in, especially if you have something from your midwife, but depending on circumstances (how long you've worked there, etc) you could possibly lose your job.

If you do go in tonight, talk to some of your coworkers (especially if you have any sympathetic female coworkers) and ask if they can help you out by carrying your heavier trays for you, and of course if you start to feel pain AT ALL, STOP IMMEDIATELY. It's not worth risking your health.

I hate stupid bosses, I had one my first pregnancy. I was ORDERED by my dr to go on half days (I was active duty military, so it was truly an order) and my boss made me feel bad about it, and basically said that I had to figure out how to get all my work done in half the time, because he wouldn't take work away from me

[StrongFeather]

tonight is my last night..I found out about the hernia yesterday..and SHOULD have called her and just said I can't work. But I waited and then today I was like "what am I CRAZY??" Now it's too late..I don't have a note..but tonight was supposed to be the last day anyway.. So I could not show up but that is so going out on the wrong foot. I don't know why I care. I am SO not going back to that place to work ever, ever..

I am just so frustrated. Mostly with myself!

[2boyzmama]

Originally Posted by StrongFeather

tonight is my last night..I found out about the hernia yesterday..and SHOULD have called her and just said I can't work. But I waited and then today I was like "what am I CRAZY??" Now it's too late..I don't have a note..but tonight was supposed to be the last day anyway.. So I could not show up but that is so going out on the wrong foot. I don't know why I care. I am SO not going back to that place to work ever, ever..

I am just so frustrated. Mostly with myself!

Oh hun, if it's your last night, just say "screw 'em!" and don't go! Seriously!

I know how you're feeling, guilty about going out on the wrong foot, but it's really not worth it. They HAVE to pay you for what you've worked so far, so don't worry about that. It's very likely you'll never see those people again. Just stay in bed relaxing

[StrongFeather]

I so want to say screw them. But I just can't I feel so bad.. I just told them I would come in and that I would work until they were slow. I am just mad that it's come to this. NOw I want to cry.

[ilovejeff]

Personally, I would not put my own health at risk to work one last shift for a place I never wanted to work again. Do I remember correctly that you'll be a SAHM after today? If so, it's not like you'll need a reference anytime soon, right? I'd call her back and tell her that she's going to have to deal. Get your midwife to write a note if you really have to.

[2boyzmama]

Originally Posted by StrongFeather

I so want to say screw them. But I just can't I feel so bad.. I just told them I would come in and that I would work until they were slow. I am just mad that it's come to this. NOw I want to cry.

It seems to me that either way you're going to feel bad. You're either going to cry now because you feel like you didn't stand up for yourself, or you'll go to work and cry there because you don't want to be there at all, or you'll skip work and sit at home and cry because you didn't go. Am I right?

Do you have a friend you can call over to be with you tonight at home? Can you take your phone off the hook, put your cell on vibrate, and rent a movie and eat popcorn instead?

I'm sorry. I have an incredibly guilty conscience, so I'm always worried about doing or having done something wrong, so I really do understand how you're feeling. But it's your last night!!!

[octobermoon]

please tell them you are sorry but can't. your health is way more important than feeling bad about being bullied into this anyway YK??? hugs...i know it's hard.......believe me! i think you really shouldn't go in though.

[texmati]

Just wanted to offer up more encouragement! Just call her up and say that you talked to your health care proffessional, and you just *cannot* work today. Did you say the word 'hernia' to her? The word is scary enough that she should let you off.

[murphysaangel]

I would work for you tonight if I could!!!

I say go in, get your check, stay as long as you feel you can before feeling any TWINGE of pain, and then say GOTTA GO, SORRY!!!

[hipmummy]

Originally Posted by 2boyzmama

You waitress? Is it possible for you to switch to hostessing instead? Or can you run the register at take-out? She can't MAKE you come in, especially if you have something from your midwife, but depending on circumstances (how long you've worked there, etc) you could possibly lose your job.

If you do go in tonight, talk to some of your coworkers (especially if you have any sympathetic female coworkers) and ask if they can help you out by carrying your heavier trays for you, and of course if you start to feel pain AT ALL, STOP IMMEDIATELY. It's not worth risking your health.

I hate stupid bosses, I had one my first pregnancy. I was ORDERED by my dr to go on half days (I was active duty military, so it was truly an order) and my boss made me feel bad about it, and basically said that I had to figure out how to get all my work done in half the time, because he wouldn't take work away from me

:

[dosergirl]

i wish you had not gone in. they have never really done anything in the 6 months that you have been pregnant to be nice or understanding for you. plus she is going to have to get used to the fact that you don't work there any more. with the hernia and everything going on emotionally, you don't need these people making you feel guilty!

i'm so sorry honey.i hope that you leave early.

[KayleeZoo]

I'm so sorry you're being bullied! That just sucks :

I'd call and tell her that, in accordance w/your healthcare professionals advice, you won't be able to come in; that you're so sorry to stick them without a waitress, but that you are sure she understands that your health and the well-being of an unborn child really is more significant than one waitressing shift- that you're sure she wouldn't want anything to happen to you or the baby while you're at work.

Screw them. You need to do what's best for you and the baby. Carrying heavy stuff, being on your feet, etc. isn't it.

[StrongFeather]

thanks everybody. I did it. I went in got paid out, IN FULL for everything they owe me, waited until the rush was over and then told her I was in pain. I actually said I needed to run to the store and get some pain killer. She asked what I needed, like maybe she was going to go get me some Tylenol, but then it became apparent that she wasn't going to be that nice. I got some tylenol, and then she sat me again..and I walked up to her and said "I'm all done, right?" and she said" looks like it. "

So that's it..all done..no more waiting tables for me.

I am really looking forward to taking it easy (or at least trying to!)

[jimblejamble]

You should not be doing any heavy lifting with a hernia! Chris just had TWO in October. Not fun!!! Take care of yourself!

[coldandsleepy]

Owww... waitressing with a hernia?! That's awful. Waitressing is hard enough even when you don't have a hernia... not to mention, when you're not six months pregnant! I'm glad you were able to get your money from them though and that you're done with them (right?).

[Lovinmum]

: stupid vulture boss!! That is so not right. If you had not been quiting I bet she would have told you to take the night off.

[StrongFeather]

Originally Posted by Lovinmum

: stupid vulture boss!! That is so not right. If you had not been quiting I bet she would have told you to take the night off.

this is kind of what I am thinking.

yes done with them, done with waitressing..ready to celebrate being a Mom!

[octobermoon]

CONGRATS on being done! now take care of yourself and come and post on here a lot!

[StrongFeather]

Originally Posted by octobermoon

CONGRATS on being done! now take care of yourself and come and post on here a lot!

haha, you mean you Mommas aren't sick of me yet?