Okay, I know this thread is old, but reading through it got me thinking of my MIL telling me about the circumstances of her two DS's deaths. (Long, sorry.)
Her two DS's died in a housefire in 1982. (This was before DH was even concieved.) The older boy was 2yrs, 3mo. The younger one was 1yr, 1mo. They were both upstairs in the nursery, the older one playing on the floor, the younger one in the crib. By the time MIL realized there was a fire in the house, it was already between her and the boys, and there was no way she could've gotten to them. She got herself out, praying, "Dear God, please don't let my babies burn. Please don't let my babies burn." The media & community really ostrasized (sp?) her for not "saving" her two boys. Like, because she hadn't risked her life and braved the flames, the boy's death was her fault. Her church actually kicked her out for it.
There were some very strange things about that fire:
The boys didn't die from the flames, they died from smoke inhalation. She was praying, "Don't let my babies burn," and they didn't. The fire had reached their room, but there were circles of unburned areas around the boys - like something was protecting them from the flames.
Someone found a bible from the house in the front yard. It was smoking, and the pages were scorched. No-one could figure out how it got in the yard. No other household object was in the yard like that. It looked like someone had just chucked it out of a window into the yard.
She asked the workers to find a heavy silver cross that had been hanging in the boys's room. Nobody could find it. The nail it had been hanging on was empty. It wasn't something that would've been destroyed by the fire. They searched that house up-and-down, and never found it. Later, one of MIL's friends, who was somewat psycic, said that the boys had taken it with them, so "They could be identified."
A few weeks later, MIL had a dream about them. She was sitting in a chair, and they were standing in front of her, dressed in white. The older one told her, "It's okay, Mommy. Don't worry. We're okay now."
If we ever have a boy, DH & I are planning on naming him Austin Wayne, the two middle names of DH's older brothers.