I think I may have to give up BF or ED!

[PeachBaby]

Its starting to get too hard!

I am doing ED for ebf DS, 6 months, had hoped to do minimum bf for 2 years, now not sure.

I am losing so much weight, skin and bones already. Trying to eat more fattening foods, healthy kind if possible of course.

First off I am in Japan, so there is the language barrier, I cant read ingredients. Foreign health food store has some stuff but is very expensive. So would ordering online be expensive, probably more than the cost of the items themselves.

Either DS or I cant tolerate: dairy, wheat, soy, and shellfish for sure. I think there is reaction to: avocado, chicken, red meat, and now sunflower seeds. I now hesitate to test for nuts/seeds which I had planned to do.

Am currently trying coconut, but dont want to overdo that. I started eating a lot of fish, but worry about the mercury.

My flax seed is running out and the health food store stopped carrying it.

My milk supply goes up and down. I have a "tea" drink to help increase it, but I think now that I am not getting enough calories, it is getting harder to maintain my supply.

I cant eat out because practically every food here has shoyu in it. When I had to stop rice, I got so hungry all the time even more than before (if that was possible since I was always hungry to begin with)

I worked so hard to make sure I could bf (challenges with the hospital here in Japan as well as numerous challenges with DS during the past 6 months) and now this! I am at a loss of what to do next. But when I think to go off the ED, DS gets horrible symptoms and I hate to do that to him.

[WuWei]

The important issue is to avoid the common food allergens. Dairy, soy, corn are the most common intolerances and they are present in all formulas, basically. There are some elemental ones which "predigest" the protein to make it more tolerated. Alternatives to formula: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...a#post13835152

Your breastmilk is the best source of immune support to help keep the intolerances from developing into life-long digestion and food issues. There is a breastfeeding support forum about latching, supply, positioning, foremilk issues. I'll link both sites. At the top of the forum are FAQs.

Lactation support: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...a#post13574464
Formula for mom?: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...hlight=formula

Elimination diets are useful for controlling the allergen exposure for a limited time. However, you need to include adequate nutrients for both you and baby. I do not believe that formula is optimal for babies. And there are homemade formulas which far excel the commercial formula's nutrients, imo.

Btw, do you have any mercury fillings, or had any mercury fillings in your teeth? Any issues with low body temperature, thyroid issues? And did you or baby receive antibiotics at birth? Do you consume any whole food probiotics? Can you reach the roof of your mouth with the tip of your tongue? Does baby have a heart shaped tongue when he cries? Tongue tie and latch problems is a major source of colic issues. Most lactation resources are not informed enough to diagnosis this. Here is a thread about tongue tie. Start on the last page, as there are some terrific links with photos and descriptions. http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=1004254

Breastfeeding Challenges: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...play.php?f=363 Check the links at the top of the forum.

Here on the Allergy forum, check the links at the top of the forum.


Epsom salt baths will help baby (and you) to detox more gently. Suppression of the symptoms by neutralizing stomach acid leads to nutrient absorption dysfunction and auto-immune issues, from my reading. Instead, I'd include homemade water kefir, which is a whole food probiotic to help rebalance gut microflora, for both you and baby.

Probiotics 101: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...s#post13920258


Where to Start, Help 101: http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=1096747



There are many alternatives which ADD nutrients and calories. There are many mamas who've btdt and want to help.


Pat

[mamafish9]

What are you eating? That may help the wise mamas here help you add calories and nutrition to your diet so that your body isn't suffering. What kinds of fats and oils are you consuming?

Also, it seems like finding someone who is fluent in both English and Japanese to go shopping with you once or twice might be really helpful, so that you can figure out more foods you can eat/buy at the grocery store.

[PeachBaby]

Thank you so much for the support!

WuWei, thank you for providing so many links, I'll try to look them up when I get spare time. I have a few mercury fillings; no thyroid issue although I do have family who do; I can't find probiotics sold here in Japan but I did find sauerkraut so I have been eating that for my probiotics; I can touch my tongue to the roof of my mouth but what does that indicate?; I don't think DS has a heart shaped tongue - I'll look when he wakes up - but when he was born the midwife said she thinks he has tongue-tie although it hasn't seemed to bother DS's nursing from what I can see in the sense that he has always made lots of pee; I don't know how I would go about getting epsom salt for bath and water kefir here in Japan, but I will look it up; how would I be neutralizing my stomach acid?

Mamafish9, thank you for your support too! I have been eating lots of fresh vegetables - lotus root, carrot, various leafy greens, okra, green beans, sweet potato, potato, "satoimo" (some kind of different potato), squash, gobo, asparagus, etc. I found canned beets, so I eat that too. I eat any fruits I can get that they sell if the price is not outrageously high or if they are sold discounted price (getting old, but still looking rather great oftentimes), or if I get an urge to splurge 'cause I miss it and can't help it! - usually apple, banana, orange/grapefuit, occasionally melons, kiwi, cherry, blueberry, papaya, peach, persimmon (not in season yet though), etc. I also eat seaweed - hijiki, konbu, wakame and nori sheets of seaweed. For meats, I have now been only eating fish - mostly fresh and canned salmon, "chirimen" which are very small fish and can be fresh soft, or sort of dried fresh, sardines either fresh or dried, and a few others occasionally. They also sell a Thai curry, which I found has okay ingredients. I also recently have been eating coconut. As mentioned, I eat sauerkraut, and I also bought apple cider vinegar. I found Vegemite which I don't care for the taste and hadn't been eating, but I looked up what it was and read that it has lots of B vitamins, so I will try that again. I just got quinoa from the health food store but it is so expensive. I also tried a small sample of hemp for the first time, great taste, but again, so expensive.

I was using olive oil (it was one from a European country), but just recently found out that it didn't solidify in the refrigerator, so once I stopped it, DS improved in his symptoms and I figured it probably had soy oil in it. There are other brands of olive oil, but it would be impractical to try to figure out which one is okay, if any. So now I don't use any oil for cooking. And the only seasoning I use is sea salt (RealSalt that I got from home). Still have a little left of my flax seeds, but at the rate I snack on them, it'll be gone soon. I wish the store would still carry this item!

I did try to go shopping a couple times with my Japanese tutor, but now I stopped studying with her since DS keeps me too busy.

I hope there is some food I am overlooking that can help me gain weight. DS keeps me so busy I don't have much free time to cook, so when I do have free time, I am always trying to cook and am always eating.

[kjbrown92]

Can you have rice?
You really need a fat in there. Can you do the more obscure seafood over there like octopus and squid.
Can you get palm oil or palm shortening?
Do you have family who can send you a care package? My brother used to live in Japan, and we'd send him boxes with all the foods he missed from home.

[mamafish9]

Originally Posted by kjbrown92

Can you have rice?
You really need a fat in there. Can you do the more obscure seafood over there like octopus and squid.
Can you get palm oil or palm shortening?
Do you have family who can send you a care package? My brother used to live in Japan, and we'd send him boxes with all the foods he missed from home.

Yeah that - you totally need some fat sources. I don't know what your options are, but fat sources will also help make your breastmilk richer, which might help your little one as well. Maybe you can try shopping with your tutor again and really specifically focus on finding some good fat sources for you? She may know about some local things you aren't aware of.

I suspect the fats issue is important enough (particularly if it will help you continue to bf) that it is worth trialing some nuts/seeds? I think my Japanese friend cooks with sesame oil a lot? What fats/oils are easily available to you besides soybean?

[PeachBaby]

Thank you for the ideas!

Unfortunately, DS reacted to rice. I tested it twice just to be sure. I was crestfallen because rice is the staple of Japan and that makes it so difficult especially since I would get my energy from that.

Octopus and squid are a good idea, but I wonder how I should season it now. I usually use oyster sauce and sesame oil when I make octopus, but I think oyster sauce has shoyu in it, so I haven't eaten it lately. Maybe I could just use salt though. Boring, but if it'll help DS, I guess I could deal with that. I am not sure how I should make squid. I used to eat it in Chinese stir fry noodles, which are completely out now. But I guess I'll have to make it like octopus.

I don't know about palm oil, I've never cooked with it before so I don't know what it might look like being sold on the shelves. DH and I are going grocery shopping very shortly though, so I'll see if I can check.

My family did send me a care package once, but the price of it took my breath away! I'd hate to have them foot another bill like that.

Okay, I'll try to search for more variety of oil sources. If I try nuts/seeds, which is the least likely to be allergenic? Nuts or seeds,..... which should I try first? What is the order of allergenicity for these? And for those two categories, which kind should I start with? I hope sesame oil will turn out to be okay for DS because I often used to cook with it. Is the seed more likely to be allergenic than the oil? And also, like with olive oil, is there the possibility of sesame oil being a combination of other oils like soy? If so, would I test it the same way by putting it in the fridge to see if it solidifies?

I'll look down the oil section to see what is sold there when we go shopping today.

Thanks once more, from me and DS too! You've helped boost my spirit again. Things are looking brighter today! I'll keep persevering.

[Millie Ivy]

I don't know anything about shipping, but could you get some coconut oil from www.tropicaltraditions.com ??? The more you buy at a time the cheaper it ends up being and it would add some necessary fat to your diet.

Can you eat beef? Pork? I saw that you suspect chicken as an allergen. You eat a fantastic array of produce, it looks to me like you desperately need more calories in the form of protein (more animal protein, IMO) and fat.

Hugs- this has to be rough. You can do it!

[kjbrown92]

My mother sent the light stuff (like puffed millet cereal) fast. And she sent the heavier stuff (creamy buckwheat cereal, flours, etc.) on the slowest method (about a month) so it was cheaper.

[SAmama]

We are in China and had a looooooong list of allergens (still have dairy, soy, egg, msg, gluten). We couldn't do rice either. And obviously there isn't anything premade that we could have. We also had problems with meat, but found out that for us it was the feed that the animals ate that was our problem - lots of soy. Dd would get the same reaction from beef that we got from soy - violent vomiting and other gi issues. We had the opportunity to raise our own chickens and it was all different. Also, when we found some grass fed beef we could do beef. Have you tried lamb or goat?

We can do rice now, but still eat lots of buckwheat and millet. You can make cookies, pancakes, cake and even a sort of bread out of it. I think Kathy has recipes for it. We normally just play around with conventional recipes - replacing things with allergen free ingredients. Breakfast pancakes for instance would be a mix of seeds, buckwheat, sorgum, and coconut soaked overnight in a blender, blend the next morning with salt and some soda if you want. As an egg replacer you can do arrow root, potato starch (sweet potato for us), corn starch, apple sauce (depending on what it is) or for cookies you often don't even need it.

One time we found some Japanese buckwheat noodles in the foreign food store. Soba noodles, maybe? There are also noodles here made out of sweet potato and also ones out of all types of beans. Can you do legumes? They are great for filling you up. We couldn't have any at first, but now we can and I LOVE lentils.

At one point we lived off of sweet potatoes and squash. If you can do normal potatoes, that helps as well. We eat A LOT of fat. If you can find butter (New Zealand Anchor butter, maybe?) you can make ghee, if it works for you. I had to strain it four times, but it is so worth it. What about lard? I don't know what the markets are like, but here you can buy pig fat and then you can render your own. Good source of vit D as well.

Oh, Vegemite might not work. It caused a HUGE reaction for us. It is a yeast derivative and for us had the same effect as msg. How about Kumbucha for those B vitamins?

Oh, and we eat lots of soups made from bone broth and veggies. Daikon is a favorite around here. And if you can find coconut milk, that was just a life saver for me. Blend it with some fruit, or cocoa and honey and freeze it. Or have it in your coffee, or over mangoes or just straight off the spoon. It is expensive here, but heck, there is so much I was going without I didn't even blink.

I know this is SO very hard. Dd is now three, but only for the last few months have the restrictions been less. And she is still nursing strong. It has been a rough ride and mostly very lonely because no-one has a frame of reference for what you are going through, especially the emotional aspect of restricted eating in a foreign country. I have never, ever been as depressed as some months the past three years. Sometimes I even resented my wonderful, supportive Dh, who would figure out new recipes for me. I also lost a lot of weight, to the point of being a bit too skinny. But after a few months we got the allergen free cooking figured out and I actually gained too much weight You can totally do this and when it is hard, just come to this forum, there are lots of mamas who understand and will support you when everyone else thinks you,re nuts to not wean.

Hugs to you mama.

[PeachBaby]

Oh, thank you so much everyone! You all are simply the greatest!

Went shopping the other day and found sunflower oil and palm oil! But they are very expensive. Before spending so much money on it, I'd want to be certain that they don't mix it with other oils, like they sometimes do with olive oil (since DS reacted to the olive oil I was using). I wonder if anyone knows. Is it just for olive oil that we have to be careful, or all oils?

Well, it turns out that DS is allergic to coconut! Of all things! He is reacting to all my sources of fats. It is my second time testing coconut just to be sure. The difference was like night and day. I would have thought he was ADD/ADHD! So I stopped eating it and then he was so much more calmer. Amazing! ..... So, Millie Ivy, although I really appreciate your suggestion for where to get a good coconut source, I won't be able to do so now, unfortunately. I love coconut too! I was so looking forward to eating it.... oh well.....

Kjbrown92, thanks for the postal suggestion, I'll check to see how the cost compares. ...... by the way, I wasn't sure if it was you, although I think it may have been, ... who had mentioned on another thread DogtorJ.net, but thanks soooo much to you (or whoever it was) for mentioning that website. I believe it is so true in my case. It was one of the most enlightening websites I have been hoping to find regarding all this allergy stuff! Very, very grateful to have been introduced to it!

SAmama, I just want to hug you! Thank you for your message! You really know what it's like being in a foreign country while having to deal with this. You give me so much hope that I now feel it can be done if you were able to. Whenever I feel like giving up, I will think of you! And I love all your ideas and advice! About the meat, I think it may also be true for us as well since DS reacted to both chicken and red meat. I will look for lamb or goat. I'm glad to hear your DD is doing better!