Women of Color #13 - Page 14

[Bloomingstar]

hiii :
I'll probably go to the still hip block party. I went to the sale, too, Jannah, just late. As for free concerts, so far we've gone to see Femi Kuti in Prospect Park and last week we saw Rebirth Brass Band at Metrotech. I cannot wait for the Purple Rain singalong in Prospect Pal (aug 6th). CANNOT WAIT!

The boy is huge now, and got his first 2 teeth last week. When does the teething end?! heh. I finally got a stroller (Britax Viguor--niiice sale online) and it's great, but VERY heavy. We still use the Moby more than the stroller, but I am thinking about getting some other kind of carrier so I can put him on my back. Hey, didn't someone on this thread have a blog with a "how-to" on back carries with a lapa? Would anyone mind reposting the link, if it's hanging around? I have a nice piece of fabric I might be able to use.

We're taking two trips soon--August to Texas to see my family, December to Tobago to see DH's family. I am nervous about this wiggly little boy on the plane but my trusty Moby may yet save the day, even though he is a giant. His 6 month check up is on Friday and I am afraid to find out how much he actually weighs. And I guess I'll weigh myself then too .

Loved the letter to the library, also.

Anyone reading anything interesting this summer? I am on a vampire kick. It started with Fledgling by Octavia Butler and has, I must sadly admit, gone into the Twilight series (haha) and I am looking forward to re-reading Tananarive Due's books. What's on your summer reading lists?

[bajamergrrl]

My summer reading list is mostly revolving around baby care books, but I do need to catch up on the Stephanie Plum series. If you're into vamps, check out the L.A. Banks Vampire Huntress series. The protagonist is a WOC who is a spoken word/hip hop artist by day and butt-kicking vampire hunter by night.

[futurmama8]

I am reading Jubilee, a couple of books for my Tanzania trip and some off of Rootz blog page.

[newmama8]

greetings

hey, ive read a few posts and wanted to join the thread. the convo's about hair are interesting...it's such a part of who we are, and at the same time it can be something so 'unimportant' too, since who we really are is not about our hair and outer appearance, but that doesn't stop me from feeling self-conscious if my locks are a little frizzy or need to be twisted on certain days...

as for the carriers...i have a moby which i loved for not-hot days/climate...and just bought a baby tai online from a sahm who makes them herself...i love wearing my daughter when its not too hot and not for extended periods as she is on her way to 30 lbs! whheww

i wish i had a cool signature, but since i dont...im a mama to a lovely almost 10 month old girl, living in st. louis, mo with my partner and working part time and mothering all the time, of course

if any one is in the STL area, let me know! i posted a thread to find some other like-minded women of color to start a local meet-up group with but didn't get any responses in my area (il-mo-iowa).

also, trying to go more raw if anyone has any tips...we're vegetarian but more vegan-leaning right now

peace!

[newmama8]

oops, i guess i do have my signature 'approved'

[eilonwy]

I'm reading The Ethical Slut, and working my way through childrens' series (His Dark Materials for the second time, Harry Potter for at least the fourth, a few others) just so that I know what's there before my son gets to all of them. He's *right* on my tail with the Harry Potters. : Oh, and this old medical textbook, because I've got a thing about old textbooks. There are some other kid's books around that Bean might pick up and I really want to make sure that I've read them all recently (or that I know them very very well) before he reads them. I just like to be prepared. That, and my mom stopped pre-reading books for me when I was abotu eight and I missed being able to discuss them all with her. She'd read lots of the books I read, but certainly not all of them and that was kind of a loss for me.

Bean's reading Harry Potter, and eyeing the copy of The Golden Compass that Mike borrowed from the library. I think he's still working through The Chronicles of Narnia, but I'm not sure. These days, I'm just *itching* to give him Ender's Game because it's fun... but I'm not 100% certain he's ready for it. I think I'll ask my family what they think.

[Jannah6]

elcome Newmama

Bloomingstar IMO this last Still Hip sale wasn't as good as the first, but I got there early and managed to get some decent finds.
As for carriers, I really really like my Sachi. Safiyyah is 21 pounds and 26 inches now and she feels so light on my back. I think BKmami might be able to recommend a good carrier( I stalked her username her on TBW )

I'm not reading anything right now. I don't read as much as I should I'm a HUGE mystery buff, but I won't pick one up until I read more on my religion. Lately I've just been reading the Quran/religious materials online because it's easiest for me.

Oh, Bloomingstar have a wonderful time on your vacations. I can't wait to see pics.
Our family can't afford a trip, private school tuition is a killer. I might take a 5 day trip with Safiyyah to SC to visit my family. I would like to see my SC family, but I kinda wish that I could go elsewhere.

[Brown Lioness]

Originally Posted by Bloomingstar

hiii :
I'll probably go to the still hip block party. I went to the sale, too, Jannah, just late. As for free concerts, so far we've gone to see Femi Kuti in Prospect Park and last week we saw Rebirth Brass Band at Metrotech. I cannot wait for the Purple Rain singalong in Prospect Pal (aug 6th). CANNOT WAIT!

The boy is huge now, and got his first 2 teeth last week. When does the teething end?! heh. I finally got a stroller (Britax Viguor--niiice sale online) and it's great, but VERY heavy. We still use the Moby more than the stroller, but I am thinking about getting some other kind of carrier so I can put him on my back. Hey, didn't someone on this thread have a blog with a "how-to" on back carries with a lapa? Would anyone mind reposting the link, if it's hanging around? I have a nice piece of fabric I might be able to use.

We're taking two trips soon--August to Texas to see my family, December to Tobago to see DH's family. I am nervous about this wiggly little boy on the plane but my trusty Moby may yet save the day, even though he is a giant. His 6 month check up is on Friday and I am afraid to find out how much he actually weighs. And I guess I'll weigh myself then too .

Loved the letter to the library, also.

Anyone reading anything interesting this summer? I am on a vampire kick. It started with Fledgling by Octavia Butler and has, I must sadly admit, gone into the Twilight series (haha) and I am looking forward to re-reading Tananarive Due's books. What's on your summer reading lists?

Im on an african-american literature kick this summer right now Im reading "Harlem Renaissance" by Nathan Irvin Huggins. Next books im tryna delve into are some W.E.B. DuBois books.

Originally Posted by newmama8

hey, ive read a few posts and wanted to join the thread. the convo's about hair are interesting...it's such a part of who we are, and at the same time it can be something so 'unimportant' too, since who we really are is not about our hair and outer appearance, but that doesn't stop me from feeling self-conscious if my locks are a little frizzy or need to be twisted on certain days...

as for the carriers...i have a moby which i loved for not-hot days/climate...and just bought a baby tai online from a sahm who makes them herself...i love wearing my daughter when its not too hot and not for extended periods as she is on her way to 30 lbs! whheww

i wish i had a cool signature, but since i dont...im a mama to a lovely almost 10 month old girl, living in st. louis, mo with my partner and working part time and mothering all the time, of course

if any one is in the STL area, let me know! i posted a thread to find some other like-minded women of color to start a local meet-up group with but didn't get any responses in my area (il-mo-iowa).

also, trying to go more raw if anyone has any tips...we're vegetarian but more vegan-leaning right now

peace!

Welcome newmama8! Hubby and I used to live in St. Louis and still have family there. Your best bet for finding other mamas there is in the Missouri Find Your Tribe area. Even tho many MDC WOC post here, a lot still do not and you might find them in there instead.

[Arike]

Originally Posted by Bloomingstar

We're taking two trips soon--August to Texas to see my family, December to Tobago to see DH's family. I am nervous about this wiggly little boy on the plane but my trusty Moby may yet save the day, even though he is a giant. His 6 month check up is on Friday and I am afraid to find out how much he actually weighs. And I guess I'll weigh myself then too .

Anyone reading anything interesting this summer? I am on a vampire kick. It started with Fledgling by Octavia Butler and has, I must sadly admit, gone into the Twilight series (haha) and I am looking forward to re-reading Tananarive Due's books. What's on your summer reading lists?

Me, my mom and DS are going to Costa Rica this friday to visit my brother. DS is SOOOO wiggly at 9 months! He moves around so much and wants to grab everything in sight even during the subway rides! I am kind of dreading the plane ride. It is a red-eye flight(2 flights with a quick layover) so I am hoping he sleeps through it all! It was so much easier when he was 2 months old and tucked into the Moby the whole time. I am currently using the Ergo Sport to carry him around. He's probably about 20 pounds now and the Moby was not cutting it for me anymore. And I was getting so hot and sweaty in it.

I have been reading the Sword of Truth Series by Terry Goodkind, It's an epic fantasy series of like 11 books. It's my secret escape. I just finished book 3 this past weekend. I have read all of the Twilight series except the last one, the writing is SO bad but it's a guilty pleasure...oh Edward, oh Bella!

[bkmami]

Hi newmama8!

Originally Posted by Jannah6

As for carriers, I really really like my Sachi. Safiyyah is 21 pounds and 26 inches now and she feels so light on my back. I think BKmami might be able to recommend a good carrier( I stalked her username her on TBW )

Thanks, Jannah! I can safely say that I have tried so many carriers but I really love using wraps because for me it is the most comfortable. (I loved the Sachi which is a mei tai.) I use woven wraps instead of stretchy ones like Moby because they are most supportive with bigger babies. I do use an Ergo esp bec it's quick on and off which is great for up and down. Wovens are a bit more expensive than Mobys but you can use them for the entire time of babywearing...I use them at times with my almost 3 year old. Also, there are so many different ways you can carry your babies with wovens, on your back, front, hip.

Originally Posted by Arike

I have been reading the Sword of Truth Series by Terry Goodkind, It's an epic fantasy series of like 11 books. It's my secret escape. I just finished book 3 this past weekend. I have read all of the Twilight series except the last one, the writing is SO bad but it's a guilty pleasure...oh Edward, oh Bella!

I need to get into some epic fantasies! I read most of the Twilight but now on the 3rd one (Eclipse) and getting just too frustrated with it. haha I have been reading a lot of birth books like Spiritual Midwifery. Such inspirational stories!

[eilonwy]

I read most of the Sword of Truth series years ago. I've got some issues with Goodkind. I read Wheel of Time and was very frustrated with that by book 8, downright angry by book 9. I'm waiting on book 5 of A Song of Fire and Ice (GRR Martin) and I'm convinced that he, like Jordan, is going to pull a Herbert on us and die before he finishes the bloody series.

These three men are the reason that I'm afraid to write my novel. I don't have an ending yet and I'll be damned if I give sf/fantasy readers one more author to bitch about.

[Arike]

Originally Posted by bkmami

I need to get into some epic fantasies! I read most of the Twilight but now on the 3rd one (Eclipse) and getting just too frustrated with it. haha I have been reading a lot of birth books like Spiritual Midwifery. Such inspirational stories!

I LOVED Spiritual Midwifery. I love all the hippies with their beards and long hair! And how everything is psychedelic during their labors! I enjoyed that book more than Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. Reading both of her books really helped me stay positive about labor and childbirth. My doula forbade me from reading "What to expect when you're expecting". I am glad she did; it's very negative and just focuses on problems and what can go wrong.

[Arike]

Originally Posted by eilonwy

[color=Indigo]I read most of the Sword of Truth series years ago. I've got some issues with Goodkind.

Ooo, I am curious to know what your issues are with Goodkind! I am very new to the Sword of Truth series. I love Sci-Fi/Fantasy/Alternative reality type stuff, do you have any suggestions for great series?

[eilonwy]

Richard Rahl knows everything. He figures things out long before he has any right to, and in ways that make absolutely no sense-- his prescience is out of step with everything else about the character. Compare that to Rand al'Thor (Robert Jordan's protagonist), who takes a book and a half to figure out why this girl he likes is suddenly dressing *very* differently and is in a rotten mood all the time, and not spending as much time with her old comrades. That's much more realistic behavior from a 17 year old boy who's got a lot on his mind (like carrying the weight of an entire fantasy series! ), and who was bright enough but certainly not a genius to begin with.

At least Goodkind manages to finish books. Well, he does a better job than Jordan (who forgot how to finish a book by the time he got to the fourth book of Eye of the World) but I guess that's not saying much.

I love Orson Scott Card; He finishes books *and* series, which makes him a rarity. If you read Magic Street, PLEASE read the introduction first. I'm tired of arguing with people who think he's a racist just because so so so many characters in his books aren't white and he doesn't really know how to do that in many cases. He knows he's a white man, he can't really help that, but I think he's much less racist and less oblivious than most science fiction writers.

Neil Gaiman-- he's FANTASTIC. I can't get enough of him, nor say enough good things about him. American Gods is just *incredible* and his Endless series is what healed me of my book snobbery. Preludes & Nocturnes is the first of the Endless books-- they're graphic novels and they're WELL worth buying, excellent work. He also writes children's books, which just tickles me.

I rather liked Alan Dean Foster as a child/teen, but I haven't read any of his books in years so I don't know how they stack up for adults. I will say that most of the books I was wild about as a child are still fantastic today (I can tell what I saw in them then, and I still enjoy them) but I like to reread to be certain.

For example: As a child, I was a HUGE fan of Isaac Asimov. As an adult, I can appreciate his work but I really think he was a jerk. I loved Larry Niven as a kid, but as an adult I thought he was a bit pretentious. Heinlein has remained enjoyable for me, because I was introduced to him as "a product of his time." Through that lens, his work is still lots of fun for me.

Oh! Have you read Battlefield Earth? I know the movie was *wretched* but the book was really fantastic.

[AndrewsMother]

What not to say to DH

Before I say anything, how can I tell my DH, in a nice way, that I think that he needs to be a better husband and provider?

[bajamergrrl]

First, welcome to newmama8!

AndrewsMother, hmm, I always find these to be tough questions to answer because I hate the thought of giving anyone bad advice. So here are some suggestions for communication:

- Whatever you end up saying to him, it might be best to make sure that you eliminate/minimize the words "but" "you" and "why" because those are words that put people on the defensive and can escalate conflict.

- Allow him to save face.

- Be sure to state your interests and not just your positions. Positions are the "whats", i.e. what you believe, want, think, etc. Interests are the "whys" , i.e. why you believe it, want it, think it.

[AndrewsMother]

Originally Posted by bajamergrrl

First, welcome to newmama8!

AndrewsMother, hmm, I always find these to be tough questions to answer because I hate the thought of giving anyone bad advice. So here are some suggestions for communication:

- Whatever you end up saying to him, it might be best to make sure that you eliminate/minimize the words "but" "you" and "why" because those are words that put people on the defensive and can escalate conflict.

- Allow him to save face.

- Be sure to state your interests and not just your positions. Positions are the "whats", i.e. what you believe, want, think, etc. Interests are the "whys" , i.e. why you believe it, want it, think it.

Your suggestions are on target with what I was thinking.

This is what I thought of emailing to him. "I don't feel, protected, valued, or cherished." It says what I feel without stating what he is not doing.

[AndrewsMother]

Welcome Newmama 8!!!!

I think that an MDC WOC mom just moved from the STL area last month.

[purplegirl]

Originally Posted by newmama8

oops, i guess i do have my signature 'approved'

Hey welcome Newmama8:. Nope, you don't have to get your signature approved

[purplegirl]

Originally Posted by AndrewsMother

Welcome Newmama 8!!!!

I think that an MDC WOC mom just moved from the STL area last month.

Yupper. I wonder if she still lurks around these parts?