post #781 of 845
5/26/10 at 10:44pm
Ya know for a minute, it was sort of stinging. I found it incredulous that he was so blatant. However, I realize he's a man who must struggle with his sense of self. I mean he's an accomplished surgeon with tremendous credentials but, he obviously felt some type of way that we had gone to the same university. I felt somewhat powerful writing him a letter because I suspect he intimidates a lot of people. I can walk away maintaining my grace and self respect meanwhile, he has to know he's a jerk!!
Yeah, Purplegirl, I'm not used to it being so blatant. I'm more used to looks of surprise or shock if I mention I have a master's degree. I don't know how I would have been! I mean, really!
At least he recognizes he's a jerk. I'm amazed by people who will readily say, "I am a jerk."
That's a good point Rynna. I guess I have to let my kids lead me when it comes to their socializing needs.
On another note . . .
I know that often issues of race and class become conflated. Here is an issue of class I am struggling with (well, I finally identified what the issue was after a lot of thinking).
I'm invited to a shower. I am not the closest of friends with the honoree but we hang out and she's cool. I like this sister--she has means but she's not showy about it. I know without ever having asked outrightly that we are of different classes. Even though she's down to earth and cool, the organizations she's involved in, town she lives in, lifestyle all indicate this. It has never been an issue for me until this shower.
I received the invitation yesterday and it came in a beautiful envelope. Lilac lining, parchment paper--the works. So I'm admiring the invite and starting to feel a little funny. I read it. It's a cutesy poem that essentially does four things:
1. asks for diapers and wipes
2. lets you know that there will be a wishing well (which means no gifts right? Just money/gift cards?)
3. guests should "wear white" (all white or something white?)
4. it will be at a gourmet restaurant (I have no idea if the guests are expected to pay for their meals, don't want to pay for expensive, nasty looking gourmet food, and don't really want to ask because it reflects on my class).
I won't know anyone beside the honoree btw and I am hell of nervous about who and who will be at this party. I am worried I'll feel uncomfortable like a fish out of water. I know I should hold my head high but I am almost certain I'll be surrounded by designer bags, fresh manicures and pedicures, and expensive white linen outfits. I'm not necessarily in the mood for all that.
You know, I grew up in the South Bronx. Never been to a baby shower that didn't involve a church basement and food in foil trays with burners underneath buffet style. Now I'm living in Westchester, hardly living like a Westchesterite but trying not to be bothered by it and making it work, trying not get hung up on race and money. It's such a minor thing too--a baby shower. Wow.
RD, yesterday I remembered that I was livid when I saw my shower invites. Someone listed the stores where I registered The invitations were already mailed, so all that I could so was suffer in silence. Perhaps your friend was in a similar situation.
As for issues of class, the denotative meaning has become convoluted by popular culture and the media. I listen to the women at my job, and realize that their meaning of class and my meaning of class are separated by different worlds. Popular entertainers are considered the echelon of society, where as I feel differently; not everything that glitters is gold.
Hey! How is everyone? Any babies born yet?
I am doing alright. M. and I are leaving Monday for a week in Seattle. I am sort of excited but, I hear the weather has been less than agreeable. I'm hoping to meet one of our MOC who currently lives in Seattle
We want to drive up to Vancouver if time permits. Really, it will be fun just getting away for a minute. Later in July, we're going to the Vineyard. As most of you know, that's my paradise
I've been struggling with a bit of depression, so any distraction from real life is welcomed.
I'd love to hear how you all are doing and what your summer plans are.
Don't worry about the weather in Seattle! It changes quickly and there are so many great indoor activities to enjoy while you are there!
And I would highly recommend going to Vancouver if you have the time. It is one of my favorite cities in the world!
Have a great time!♥
Erika(I don't wear a fro, I'm just a sister who likes this smilie!):