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Introverted moms with children - Page 2

post #21 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by veggiebytes View Post
I need to lighten up and not think so much about myself. I have found that helping others is a good way to realize the world is not just about me and that I do have talents/positive aspects to share with others. There are other introverted moms out there who do want to have friends, they just want meaningful ones and not the superficial fake hellos and "keeping up with the Jones" type conversation.
Exactly what I was thinking. As for "socialization"...way over emphasized in my opinion. Kids need to play, they need to be loved, they need to eat, and to sleep. They do not need crowds of children doing activities together to be well adjusted, and I really consider it more of a hindrance than a help as far as kids developing their genuine interests, personality, etc. I think introverts tend to be looking for a more genuine life in general, and so weed out the superfluous stuff. How could that be bad for a child?
post #22 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by veggiebytes View Post
My daughter on the otherhand was born wanting to be out in the world...never wanted to snuggle...she wanted to be facing out in her Baby Bjorn before her head was even stable.
<snip>
There are other introverted moms out there who do want to have friends, they just want meaningful ones and not the superficial fake hellos and "keeping up with the Jones" type conversation.
That was my daughter too! In fact, I started a thread not too long ago asking for survival techniques because I am the only introvert in a family of four. Not too long ago, I became depressed because I realized my daughter wanted MORE interaction already! We see cousings regularly and she accompanies me around everywhere. But when I took her to the park and she did nothing but chase around other little people trying to make friends I thought "Damn! I guess this means I have to join mommy and me." <shrugs shoulders> Eh, what're you gonna do?

And the other issue I'm having is that I'm lonely. My world is filled with superficial and very little deeper connection. I mean, how to introverts find one another? It's not like we are likely to just strike up conversation!

OP, As far as wondering how other people think of my aloofness, I have soooo given up even caring about that. I make the effort to smile, literally, and to have an overall positive demeanor. I find that does wonders to bridge the gaps that my lack of chit-chat conversations make.
post #23 of 23
I am not a phone person either. I used to feel guilty about it and tried to force myself to make more calls to friends/family but I just couldn't do it. In fact, a few years ago, my sister had a huge issue with me not calling enough. She lives in another state and prefers phone over email but I think she's resigned herself to the fact that I'm a different person than she is. She was a cheerleader in high school and very social and outgoing and when we visit in person or talk on the phone, I am so drained. It's too much interaction for me.

I never thought about how my shyness/introversion would affect my daughter. I think it's because she's a little like me except that she's a bit more social. She loved playing with other kids (she's an only), I did notice that and she liked having her little friends over but I wasn't comfortable with it. But she was good about playing by herself and seemed happy as long as we were together. I grew up in the kind of household where children "should be seen and not heard" so maybe that has something to do with my shyness. Because of it I'd let my dd babble on and on. She still likes to talk and she used to mention that she feels like she's keeping up the conversation more than I am. I feel bad about that but sometimes I just really cannot think of something to say. I really try with her, though, and I know I'm better than I used to be. We have lots of nice conversations now.
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