I'm having difficulty with my 3 year old DS. I just keep getting so frustrated over things and just don't know what to do. He isn't cooperating very well and is just not listening well to us at all. Examples, if we ask him to be more quiet because DD is sleeping, he gets louder - even yells. If we ask him to stop such and such because its going to hurt his sister (she's 8mos), he still does it. If we ask him not to do such and such, he still does. Nothing that use to work works now. So phrasing things in the positive, like to DO such and such instead of DON'T DO such and such isn't working.
He also whines and cries over things so much lately. Like he is really having a hard time when something doesn't go the way he wants, whether in regards to an activity, food, tv, whatever. (TV, as in, him wanting to watch it and I try not to have him watch it)
My husband's solution in all of this is to be consistent and put him in time out every time. But I don't think that works. And some things aren't a discipline issue the way he wants to handle it. Meaning, the whining isn't him being disobedient or whatever. My husband says that it is though because he already told our son not to whine, so if he whines, he's disobeying. I don't agree that the answer is always to put him in time out. (BTW, our version of time out is middle of the road right now. We have had "time ins" but they were always fun for him. So now it is middle of the road. We don't leave him there completely to ignore him and have him cry. We still talk through things and whatnot. So it has gentle aspects in it.
Anyway, I'm just not sure what to do anymore. Every day is constant frustration and battle and uncooperativeness.
Please help me with this 3 year old stage that I am not liking. I'm not sure if its just the age, us not feeding him well (he eats healthy, but maybe not always the right balance of foods??), too much tv (he probably does watch too much as I tend to the baby), us not doing the right things, or what...
ETA: I have begin raising my voice a little more and talking more sternly, which I don't want to do, but it seems to be the only thing that helps him to actually cooperate and pay attention to what I am saying. But then too much of all of this leads to me feeling more frustrated and I think adds to his frustration eventually. My husband, for a while, has been raising his voice more often. I don't like it. I think it is yelling. But he says it works - that then DS listens.
sigh, just don't know what to do.
He also whines and cries over things so much lately. Like he is really having a hard time when something doesn't go the way he wants, whether in regards to an activity, food, tv, whatever. (TV, as in, him wanting to watch it and I try not to have him watch it)
My husband's solution in all of this is to be consistent and put him in time out every time. But I don't think that works. And some things aren't a discipline issue the way he wants to handle it. Meaning, the whining isn't him being disobedient or whatever. My husband says that it is though because he already told our son not to whine, so if he whines, he's disobeying. I don't agree that the answer is always to put him in time out. (BTW, our version of time out is middle of the road right now. We have had "time ins" but they were always fun for him. So now it is middle of the road. We don't leave him there completely to ignore him and have him cry. We still talk through things and whatnot. So it has gentle aspects in it.
Anyway, I'm just not sure what to do anymore. Every day is constant frustration and battle and uncooperativeness.
Please help me with this 3 year old stage that I am not liking. I'm not sure if its just the age, us not feeding him well (he eats healthy, but maybe not always the right balance of foods??), too much tv (he probably does watch too much as I tend to the baby), us not doing the right things, or what...
ETA: I have begin raising my voice a little more and talking more sternly, which I don't want to do, but it seems to be the only thing that helps him to actually cooperate and pay attention to what I am saying. But then too much of all of this leads to me feeling more frustrated and I think adds to his frustration eventually. My husband, for a while, has been raising his voice more often. I don't like it. I think it is yelling. But he says it works - that then DS listens.
sigh, just don't know what to do.
