safety issues - Page 2

[chickabiddy]

Originally Posted by futurmama8

what other seats do you suggest? I really think some kind of booster would be good for the 4yo boy, but which ones are good for him as he is tall and skinny. The baby girl is tall for her age but not too tall but very solid, probably about 30 pounds.

Thank you everyone for your suggestions. I am taking this seriously and plan to talk to her sunday about it when I go visit them.

Albeebaby has high-backed Graco Turboboosters for $40: they are a better choice for a 4yo than the Cosco HBB, since the 4yo will likely have outgrown the harness on the Cosco seat by height, and the Turbobooster is a MUCH better booster.

For the 2yo, an Evenflo Chase -- I don't have a specific site recommendation, but it's usually around $60. It also harnesses to 40#, but the harness measures 16.75" instead of 15" for the Cosco seat. The Chase also converts to a booster -- it's not a super booster, but it will do. Ideally, in 2 years or when she outgrows the harness, you can put her in the high-backed Turbobooster and get a cheap backless for the older boy, but the Chase as a booster is *definitely* better than nothing.

[Lovemy3babies]

Your a good friend!

I cant believe some here would suggest calling CPS, possibly getting children taken away from their mother because of this. I think that IS abuse of the system. While there are children being beaten, abused sexually, starving and we are going to use the system because someone doesnt put their child in the proper restraint in the car? It is worse on those children to be taken from there mother then for them not to be in the proper seats, period.

[DahliaRW]

Originally Posted by Lovemy3babies

Your a good friend!

I cant believe some here would suggest calling CPS, possibly getting children taken away from their mother because of this. I think that IS abuse of the system. While there are children being beaten, abused sexually, starving and we are going to use the system because someone doesnt put their child in the proper restraint in the car? It is worse on those children to be taken from there mother then for them not to be in the proper seats, period.

I have yet to hear a CPS case where children were removed for not using car seats. Usually in safety issue cases like that they just make sure that the parent fixes the issue. It takes more than one report to get children removed, usually multiple and usually really severe.

[Equuskia]

Originally Posted by Lovemy3babies

Your a good friend!

I cant believe some here would suggest calling CPS, possibly getting children taken away from their mother because of this. I think that IS abuse of the system. While there are children being beaten, abused sexually, starving and we are going to use the system because someone doesnt put their child in the proper restraint in the car? It is worse on those children to be taken from there mother then for them not to be in the proper seats, period.

mmm...I guess while they don't get in an accident, that could be true. But I think calling CPS and having them make a visit is worth it to avoid having a small child suffering with a broken neck, or confined to a wheelchair for the rest of their lives or losing a sibling because of the willful negligence of their caretaker. These children are in immediate danger every time they ride in a car. And that is what CPS is there for, to help children in immediate danger. It has even been suggested here that 911 be called when seeing an unrestrained child in a car, because that is an emergency.

[AndrewsMother]

CPS would rather help the friend get seats than take her children from her, but I would not call either if I had the power to help her. If after speaking to the friend and giving her seats she failed to use them I might call, but not because she has a lack of knowledge.

[sapphire_chan]

What I don't get is why she threw away the car seats when they turned 2? Isn't that a total waste of money? I mean, I can see someone breaking the law to avoid spending more money, but breaking the law after they've already spent the money is just not sensible.

[futurmama8]

The thing is that she uses really..and I mean really old seats. Like early 90s that she picked up from a yard sell. She is very out of the loop when it comes to this and doesn't know and to be honest most low income people I know don't use proper restraints for their children. She really needs to be educated first and I really don't feel like I am doing her happy babies justice if I take them away from her mother.

What if she doesn't end up using the seats that I offer and I call cps, I honestly will feel like a horrible person if her babies get taken and she will know it was me who called . I know that kids are more important but I am very loyal to people ya know?

[triscuitsmom]

Originally Posted by futurmama8

What if she doesn't end up using the seats that I offer and I call cps, I honestly will feel like a horrible person if her babies get taken and she will know it was me who called . I know that kids are more important but I am very loyal to people ya know?

Said as gently as possible ... How will you feel if she gets into an accident and you are left consoling her about the loss of one or both of her beloved babies? I would hate to be in your shoes... truly... I don't know how I would possibly make the call. I would have to look at whether I could know they were in an accident and feel like I had done everything in my power by offering seats and knowledge... or whether I'd have nagging thoughts that I could have done more.

Many for you in this situation Mama.

[queenjane]

I wouldnt call CPS. I would do my best to help educate the mom, but then i would let it go.

I dont know about other places, but around here, i doubt CPS would even investigate a "mom doesnt use carseats" call. I dont think that would even warrant a home visit. I would imagine many if not most of the people they see dont use carseats at all, dont use them properly, or have kids out of seats entirely once they are a few years old. I dont think it even rates on their radar.

You should have seen the seat i was forced to put my foster baby in when they came to take her away to relatives. I hope it wasnt expired, but the straps were really high, all twisted, it looked like crap (and i hear thats the norm)...no way would they even think to rearface her even though she was just a year old and 23 pounds.

I bet there are *foster* parents who ride around with kids in no carseats, unfortunately. Yes, the kids are in danger of dying if they get in an accident, but i think CPS would view this as having bigger fish to fry. If you DO decide to "call someone", you could call the police and say you saw someone driving on such and such street, here's the license number, two unrestrained small children in the car.

In the end though, i think you can only do so much. Maybe keep trying with the mom, from every angle you can think of (whether its the legal angle, the safety angle, the "but if theyre strapped in they cant get into trouble in the car" angle, whatever).

Good luck.

[Honey693]

As an alternative to calling CPS couldn't she just call the local police department and say she saw a car with the license plate "whatever" driving by and there were two very small children not in seats? Maybe a ticket and a lecture from a cop would scare the mom if nothing else is working.

[an_aurora]

CPS won't take her kids away for not being in car seats, but they will at least contact the family and try to help them get seats.

[Spirit Dancer]

I would NEVER call CPS if someone drove with their children unrestrained. I would definately seek to educate them though.
BTW, IN a number of states it is leagal for a 4 year old to sit with just a lap belt and no booster. But I agree, this is not very safe.

[moaningminny]

Around here CPS generally doesn't deal with car seat issues - the police do. I have called the police about a neighbour who carried her baby in the front seat with her, and they were very good about the whole thing. They called the parents in, explained the situation to them and why it was dangerous and the parents are now using a carseat.

I debated about what to do, but when it came down to it I knew I would feel partially responsible if anything ever happened to the child.

[futurmama8]

She definitely wants carseats now!!

Can you tell me which seat is the best out of these three?

1. Graco high back turbobooster
2. Evenflo Big kid booster
3. cosco high back booster

Thanks

[DahliaRW]

If those are the only options, I would do a turbobooster for the 4yo. But she will have to teach him how to sit properly in it all the time. The younger one cannot be in a belt positioning booster, so of those three the best option is the cosco. If she can spend a bit more, I'd really recommend looking at an Apex for the higher harness height.

[chickabiddy]

Originally Posted by futurmama8

She definitely wants carseats now!!

Can you tell me which seat is the best out of these three?

1. Graco high back turbobooster
2. Evenflo Big kid booster
3. cosco high back booster

Thanks

Absolutely the turbobooster for the 4yo, but the 2yo needs a harnessed seat. The Evenflo Chase I recommended (twice) above is a harnessed seat with high slot straps (almost as high as the Apex) and a very low price. It turns into a booster when the harness is outgrown -- it's not the best booster or even close to it, but it is oodles better than nothing!

[futurmama8]

Thanks. Those three above were just for the 4 yo. How will she need to teach him to sit in it properly?

Thanks again chicabiddy

[chickabiddy]

Shoulder belt through the red belt guide, lap belt under booster arms (and make sure you put the screws in the armrests if you get the Turbobooster!) -- sometimes with new booster riders it's helpful to lock the shoulder belt to ensure proper positioning.

[AndrewsMother]

Originally Posted by futurmama8

She definitely wants carseats now!!

Can you tell me which seat is the best out of these three?

1. Graco high back turbobooster
2. Evenflo Big kid booster
3. cosco high back booster

Thanks

I am happy for your friend, and her children!!!

[DahliaRW]

Yeah, the 4yo will need to sit back and still so the seatbelt stays in proper position. Given that she needs a cheaper seat, and other high weight harnessing seats that convert to good boosters aren't an option, the turbo is a really good booster that will last a long time, versus the cosco one with a harness that he might already be too big for and it doesn't fit most kids well as a booster.