Handling a 2 year old who hits?

[NaturalMindedMomma]

I have to say, I am quite disapointed in myself. I am about to lose my temper and I am really trying not to. My 26 month old is a hitter. She slaps me in the face over and over and over again, throws toys, hits, kicks, punches.

SOmetimes she does it when she is frustrated, like when I say no for something, but most times she thinks it's funny. It really hurts my feelings and just plain hurts.

Anyone have suggestions? I seriously considered spanking her the other day and didn't but you can see my desperation and mounting anger.

[Pumpkin_Pie]

No advice, but lots and lots of sympathy. My 27 month old is a major hitter and screamer right now. He only tends to hit me, but he always laughs when he does it, and tries to squirm out of my arms when I try to talk to him about it. I have resorted to time-outs, but I hate them. I completely understand the urge to spank in the heat of the moment too. So far I have not spanked DS, but I have sat him down in a chair way too hard. It is so hard to stay rational when you have a flailing toddler slapping your face hard enough to hurt you. Especially when you have to have them in your arms. DS loves to run toward the road, and it is not always possible to have him in the stroller or on his leash (no flames for the leash please, it is a safety issue for us), so when he is able to make a break for the road, I pick him up and say that he needs to stay with me to stay safe. He will often scream at the top of his lungs and hit me in the face to try to get down. It is an extremely frustrating situation.

I wish I had a solution for you, mama.

[laila2]

Of coarse you are impatient

My almost 3 year old is also a hitter. We constantly have to remind him of 'gentle touches' and show him what we mean by petting etc. Part of it is our fault I believe due to dh watching somewhat violent/agressive shows on TV, or video games, while he is present. But he also picks it up from day care, and other kids (DD is almost 6)We try to change the channel in time but sometimes he sees stuff. Other things we do is time outs, take toys away, holding him still. Sometimes I think he just needs to get out some energy so I walk him around the block which does wonders. Good luck

[NaturalMindedMomma]

Abrielle only watches noggin or Noggin shows which tend to be pretty mild. I am wondering if this is coming from my stepkids who were raised somewhat differently than Abrielle and can have some aggression issues. Not that they are intentionally doing anything wrong.

Also lately she has been talking about scary monsters in her room or other things like that and I wonder about that as well.

My mom tends to play with her while chasing her around and saying "I'm gonna get you back" when Abrielle hits which makes it a game and she visits grandma a lot and they let her eat, do whatever she wants for the most part. I think part of it may be boredom, I am so pregnant and it's so hard to walk anywhere or do much these days.

She can be destructive and demanding too which is tough. She is obsessed with apple juice and if I say no I get beat up and yelled at. She also will totally go limp in my arms as I am trying to put her down because it is so hard for me to hold her when she is losing it. Then she throws herself down and gets hurt and people in public are looking at me like a jerk.

I have tried explaining, hugging, ignoring, speaking loudly or yelling, time outs (which are a nightmare I would have to literally hold her down and I just cannot do that.

Bedtime has gotten later and later and barring putting her in her bed and closing the door or gating it, I physically cannot keep getting up to pick her up and put her in bed. Co sleeping is just not an option and I tried having her in our room and that is worse.


Thanks for letting me vent and making me feel in good company.

[mnj77]

My dd went through this in a mild way, so my approach might not work. I found that engaging her in a discussion or getting angry just egged her on. Every time she went to hit me, I just walked out of the room. The first couple of times I said "I don't like it when you hit me," and then I just said nothing. I stayed away for a minute, and then when I came back I asked if she could give me a gentle touch. She seemed to like that closure, and she usually did it. If not, I didn't make a big deal of it or try to force it. It took a couple months (so who knows, maybe she just grew out of it and my technique had nothing to do with it!), but she almost never hits me anymore. She's more likely to throw herself on the floor and scream now, which is fine with me because it only hurts my ears

[NaturalMindedMomma]

Originally Posted by mnj77

My dd went through this in a mild way, so my approach might not work. I found that engaging her in a discussion or getting angry just egged her on. Every time she went to hit me, I just walked out of the room. The first couple of times I said "I don't like it when you hit me," and then I just said nothing. I stayed away for a minute, and then when I came back I asked if she could give me a gentle touch. She seemed to like that closure, and she usually did it. If not, I didn't make a big deal of it or try to force it. It took a couple months (so who knows, maybe she just grew out of it and my technique had nothing to do with it!), but she almost never hits me anymore. She's more likely to throw herself on the floor and scream now, which is fine with me because it only hurts my ears

LOL MArisa, a tantrum I can deal with. Maybe I will try walking away... HMMM