Can you help me with finding a Christian denomination?

[Savoir Faire]

Hello all....here's a super quick historical background on me...I am trying to figure out which Christian denomination I should belong to. Basically born and raised Catholic until age ten. Became Baptist was born again at 14 and went to Baptist church until age 20 or so. Have gone to non-denominational churches off and on but tend to get turned off and stop going.

I would really like to join a church so that my children can learn about God and that we could belong to a community of believers. The problem? I just can't figure out where to go. As I keep searching for what I need, I have figured out some things I do/don't want.

*I want a non-evangelical church, as in the sense of not making friendships just to win people over to Christ (had to do this on a mission trip and I hated it) but more focused on doing good things for people for Christ (a la Mother Theresa).

*NOT Charismatic. I am not comfortable with dancing or raising hands in the air.

*I'm not really into the new thing of having rock bands in churches. I like choirs, but don't necessarily need solemn chants or anything like that for music. Actually, i'm not a huge fan of the praise time at church-- I much more enjoy the sermon.

*No "alter call" each week. No baby baptism or confirmation.

I feel so lost trying to do this. I've looked at a variety of theologies online and find myself becoming so confused with each passing day.

Anyone have any ideas?

[inkslinger]

I would say Lutheran, but Lutherans do baby baptism and confirmation.

[Savoir Faire]

See? THat's my problem...maybe I can't have the cake and eat it, too? I like what I've read about Lutherans and such....but then there's the baptism.

I guess I have to figure out what is most important.

[BFandHS]

I'm thinking Baptist sounds best, but I can't promise no altar call.

[lilmom]

Church of Christ does not do baby baptism or confirmation. Also, no musical instruments are allowed in C of C because they feel it is not Biblically based to have musical instruments (I disagree personally..but this is their belief). So you will not get any praise sessions, dancing, etc..worship is focused on the sermon..there is very little ritual done, even as far as the communion. Very strange to me, being raised Methodist, but DH was raised C of C and is pretty committed to staying that way. Anyway it sounds like it might work for you!

[expatmommy]

Mennonites tend to be service focused & don't do infant baptism. They range from very conservative to more charismatic.

[Ravin]

It might sound cheezy, but the belief-o-matic at beliefnet.org might be a good place to start.

There's also the "What Kind of Christian Are You?" quiz.

[Bluegoat]

I think that there are a number of things you might try.

In generally, aside from your feelings about infant baptism,, the things you have described are part of praxis, that is, the practise of everyday worship, not theology. So as far as individual churches go, you might find a church that does not do all the altar-call, praise music stuff, that also reflects your theological views, which seem to be Anabaptist in direction. For example, I used to live next to a Baptist church that was, stylistically, much like a highh Anglican church - good choir, a focus on a dignified liturgy, but remained Baptist theologically. This would require some searching around. I'd stay away from the mega-churches, which are less likely to be what you are looking for. You might also find out, say, some local Baptist minister's or administrators emails and just tell them you are looking for an "older style" or more traditional congregation.

Another possibility is to put aside the infant baptism thing, and try a Lutheran or Anglican, or some other church, and just see how it goes. Those churches have a more sacramental focus, which you wouldn't really have seen in the Baptist church, and the whole package might start to make more sense. (I know you said you grew up RC, and they are of course sacramental, but most people aren't ready to think about what that really means until they are in their late teens.) It would be a learning experience anyway.

Or, you could try to find, say, a Mennonite congregation, or maybe even some Quakers. Those groups can vary quite a lot between congregations or meetings, which makes it a little more tricky.

Or, just pick a church near your house that doesn't have praise bands, and give it a try.

As an aside - I am with you on the "making friends" just to convert people. I think it is incredibly insincere - kind of a lie.

[Picturesque]

We belong to the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ). Our service and structure meet your criteria.

[jeliphish]

church of the brethren

[Savoir Faire]

You guys are awesome. I was trying to explain the differences between, say, Catholic, Anglican and Methodist today to my husband and I was like "well, they all believe in Jesus...."so yes, it really does seem to be more of what I want in the day to day part.

Granted, my children are no longer infants (3 and almost 5) so I guess infant baptism probably isn't going to worry me too much..

[artgoddess]

Originally Posted by Ravin

It might sound cheezy, but the belief-o-matic at beliefnet.org might be a good place to start.

There's also the "What Kind of Christian Are You?" quiz.

Take these quizes, really they help narrow things down for a lot of people.

[Bluegoat]

Originally Posted by artgoddess

Take these quizes, really they help narrow things down for a lot of people.

I didn't like the "What Kind of a Christian are You" quiz, it gave me a very misleading result - it said I was Pat Robertson Christian!???!!!

[artgoddess]

Originally Posted by Bluegoat

I didn't like the "What Kind of a Christian are You" quiz, it gave me a very misleading result - it said I was Pat Robertson Christian!???!!!

oh no! I've had and others have had really helpful results from beliefnet

[Bluegoat]

Originally Posted by artgoddess

oh no! I've had and others have had really helpful results from beliefnet

The belief-o-matic did describe me accurately, but not the What kind of Christian . I think it's too weighted to an American Protestant focus.

The problem with these quizzes, is they assume kind of an organized and well informed POV. But of course, many people "beginning" in religion as adults, even if they were raised with it, are really in a position of needing to learn more.

[*honeybee*]

Originally Posted by Bluegoat

The belief-o-matic did describe me accurately, but not the What kind of Christian . I think it's too weighted to an American Protestant focus.

The problem with these quizzes, is they assume kind of an organized and well informed POV. But of course, many people "beginning" in religion as adults, even if they were raised with it, are really in a position of needing to learn more.

agreed.

[indie]

Disciples of Christ
American Baptist
Cooperative Baptist

[genifer]

I tried those quizzes, lol, and they are very narrow in their ...uh... judgements. Apparently, Im a Pat Robinson kind of Christian, and that is SO far from the truth.

It might sound cheezy, but the belief-o-matic at beliefnet.org might be a good place to start.

There's also the "What Kind of Christian Are You?" quiz.

You know what I find funny? Those of us who are Pat Robinson Christians but find it kind of insulting or inacurate... maybe that could be a new catagory! LOL. We are the 'Christians who some would consider ''Pat Robinson' kind of christians but find it insulting and rather inacurate'... What the heck does that say about us?!

See, I believe in a lot of the same things as, lets say Pat Robinson... but that in no way describes how I *practice* my faith. That particular one is kind of shallow, I guess.

[buttercups.nest]

I think you really just have to get out there and try your local churches. When we lived up north we found a little Mennonite church about 30min from where we lived.....I loved it there! Even though it was Mennonite, you couldn't tell (with the exception that everyone was related to everyone, but I think that was more cause it was a small town farm country). Not even the pastor was Mennonite. Its been 2years since we moved away and we have yet to find a new home church :s

Good luck!

[theretohere]

Another vote for giving Lutheranism a try.