racist relatives around my child (long) - Page 2

[KaylaBeanie]

My brother and uncle are exceptionally homophobic and racist against anyone who isn't visibly very white. I seriously dread ever having children and letting them be around my prejudiced family members...thank you for sharing your experience. I think a lot of people try to brush things like this under the rug and ignore it.

[barefootmama0709]

My DH's dad is like this as well-he's also a Vietnam vet so I can't count the racist references there either. We haven't said anything like that to him yet-he has been pretty good about filtering himself around our kids and has even lectured my DH on his (unintentional) use of the "F" word (just the swear, not the derogatory homophobic term). FIL and I don't see eye-to-eye on many things but he does love our kids so we just limit our time there.

[mommysarah5]

When they make hateful comments in their home, leave. When they make them in your home, tell them to leave. When you feel calm you can let them know how you feel about it and that you and your son will not be around that.

I'm sorry you are going through this I really have a problem with discrimination and prejudice. I was raised in such a way and in such an area that racism was never an issue. I was appauled and shocked when we moved and our neighbors were racist. They had some thing to say about the diversity of friends I had. Friends that were hard to make in a town where everyone is so prejudice. It was hard to meet a white person who wasn't prejudice and I couldn't be friends with people like that. I met a few. I tried to make friends with other people, but they were racist against white people, but I made a few friends that way too eventually. I ended up in a very diverse group of friends, who often my neighbors would question my parents on why they let me hang out with "thugs" (and imo thug has nothing to do with skin color, but apparently it did to them - which is sad because they people were much more respectable young adults then they were full grown adults)

just a little personal experience to throw in there. It was a shock for me to learn that racism is still a big issue

[Cinder]

We don't have a racism issue, but my stepdad is very homophobic, we made it clear to him the first time he said something that we would not allow that kind of talk from anyone (him or his then 5 year old daughter) in front of our kids...and it worked, he says nothing homophobic in front of our children anymore...

[RiverSky]

I think it's time to get some bumper stickers!!!!

There's a website called the Anti-Racist Parent, and if you google it, I imagine you will find some very useful tips on things you can do, and/or print off and/or email out.

Meanwhile, add some "anti-racism" bumper stickers to your car...even put them on your fridge! Personally, I would put a sign near the front door, a couple on the fridge and bumper stickers on my car and be ready when anyone from that side of the family comes over.

Many years ago, even before having children, I made it very clear to all of DH's racist/homophobic family that we would leave at any of that sort of talk and that it was NOT acceptable in our own home and over the years, there has never been a comment around us, though I hear they continue when we are not around.

Thank you for taking a stand!!! You rock!!