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Mothering › Mothering Forums › Natural Living › The Mindful Home › Frugality & Finances › need advice kinda fast.... whould you give up money to spend time with family?
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need advice kinda fast.... whould you give up money to spend time with family?

post #1 of 9
Thread Starter 
Ok first things first... we DONT have kids yet so it is just DH and I.

I am meeting with my boss today and he is wanting me to take a new spot with my company (he is not the kindest nor is he trustworthy). i will be giving up about 10,000 a year for this job but my base salary will go up by 20,000 a year. i am salary + commission and i see as much traffic on the weekends and i do all week. i will not be in the same place all the time so it will be much harder to build a bond with people

so Pros-

i will have weekends off to spend more time with DH
i will have a larger set mth income

Cons-
I will loose about 10,000-15,000 of my income over the year
we will have to change our enjoyed life style
it will be much harder to pro form in this new job


so what do you think...
post #2 of 9
I guess I don't understand your financial situation. You say you will lose about $10,000 a year on commissions, but your base salary will go up by $20,000 a year, so how is that a bad thing financially?

As for the rapport you feel will be lacking if you go to M-F 9-5, I would think that the gained time with your family would definitely be worth it.
post #3 of 9
Thread Starter 
because the 20,000 is a salary. so let say i normally make 70,000 ( this is my salary + my commissions) a year i will go down to 60,000 - 55,000 a year if i take the job because i will loose out on more commissions...
post #4 of 9
the way i see it is we work hard to make enough money to live comfortably with our family.. not the reverse. time is precious and not something we can gaurantee on having for a long time, so use it wisely. if you are not in financially difficult situation, definitely free up the weekend to be with your husband.

if i were in your position, i'd take the new offer.. as for your lifestyle change - think of it as practice for moving down to one income should you decide to stay at home if you have children.

goodluck with your decision!
post #5 of 9
I spent 2 years working evening and weekend shifts. It put a lot of stress on my marriage and I found I was getting fewer and fewer invitations from friends (since I could never hang out with them, they found other people to hang out with and slowly forgot about me. It is natural, really.) Quitting that job was one of the best decisions I've made, even though it was a hit financially.

I guess I am confused too about what you'd be getting or giving up, but I'd say for me, the time with my loved ones was much more important. On the other hand, for a lot of couples money is the big stressor of the relationship, so if that is the case for you, maybe you should pick the money. You could also give it a go in the new position for a year or two and then try to arrange for something better if it doesn't seem to be working out.
post #6 of 9
just from the undertone of your first post, it doesn't sound like you are thrilled about this prospect. I would go with your gut on this one.
post #7 of 9
It does take 10 months to make a baby - or much longer. I found it helpful to have the "distraction" of a busy job plus school before I had my baby. If your husband is going to be deployed in the future, a busier job might be better for you

I see three issues:
* do you need to make more money now to afford a baby and SAHM or part time work in a few years?
* do you want to have a more relaxed lifestyle right now - which job is lower stress?
* what is the job security of the sales vs. salary based job?

If your baby plans are fairly immediate, you could also consider which job would work best with taking care of the baby. In this economy, I would worry about the above three things first.

To answer your title question, I could possibly have a stressful engineering job with a one plus hour commute. This would put our child in after school care for hours. I have chosen not to pursue FT working right now so I can have time with my kid. He appreciates it.
post #8 of 9
Thread Starter 
THANK YOU MAMAS! i worry because i am doing well right now where is am but time with DH is small. i dont need to work like crazy but it is how we have 'fun' and save money.

i plan to SAH when and if a baby comes anytime soon. this will just help save money up until that point.

DH is going to Iraq again in March (he just got back in feb) so time with him IS important however i need to work with what works best for the long haul because he is not going to be around for a year. right now we make it work, but weekends would be nice...

UGH!!!!
post #9 of 9
To answer the question in your title, YES. We do give up money so dh can spend time with the family. In fact, I felt the need to respond because I just finally told him that I cannot handle him being gone as much as he has been for work and there are no ifs, ands, or buts about it. We have three children, though, so a very different situation from yours.

Best of luck making your decision. You really should trust your gut.
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