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Anyone let their toddler run around in stores? - Page 4

post #61 of 182
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamatoablessing View Post
Actually, no. I guess I'd never thought of it that way though. So from that perspective, you're right. It could happen to anyone. But I have definitely seen accidents (and destruction of my products) involving little ones. See my previous post about the toddler scaling one of my produce bins.
Ah yes, I did see that post. That would be unofortunate. But that would probably be more of an instance where proper supervision was not applied.
post #62 of 182
Quote:
Originally Posted by magstphil View Post
All the more reason to keep your kids close by. Adults often times just aren't paying attention while shopping.
Yup, I agree. I mentioned previously that I was a fan of walking near mama, not free range running around.
post #63 of 182
Quote:
Originally Posted by suebee79 View Post
Ah yes, I did see that post. That would be unofortunate. But that would probably be more of an instance where proper supervision was not applied.
You'd be amazed at what can happen when one looks away for a literal second, ykwim? If your child is 15 feet away from you and goes to pull on some shelving you could be looking right at them and saying "no don't!" and that whole display could go down on them before you get there. It really can happen in the blink of an eye.

Stores aren't child proof though they do have safety standards it's pretty impossible to make them child proof. They are also a place where people are focusing on the task at hand and little else.
post #64 of 182
Quote:
Originally Posted by magstphil View Post
You'd be amazed at what can happen when one looks away for a literal second, ykwim? If your child is 15 feet away from you and goes to pull on some shelving you could be looking right at them and saying "no don't!" and that whole display could go down on them before you get there. It really can happen in the blink of an eye.

Stores aren't child proof though they do have safety standards it's pretty impossible to make them child proof. They are also a place where people are focusing on the task at hand and little else.
I wasn't picturing 15 feet being near me. When dd and I are out, she is free to walk beside me within arm's reach. That's my version of "near".
post #65 of 182
Quote:
Originally Posted by suebee79 View Post
I wasn't picturing 15 feet being near me. When dd and I are out, she is free to walk beside me within arm's reach. That's my version of "near".
Sorry I wasn't talking directly to you. I quoted you because it was the comment that brought it to mind ("where proper supervision was not applied") but really I am just thinking "out loud"

I agree with you!
post #66 of 182
I don't let any of my children run around the store. They can walk next to the cart, hold the cart or get in the cart.
post #67 of 182
Quote:
Originally Posted by magstphil View Post
Sorry I wasn't talking directly to you. I quoted you because it was the comment that brought it to mind ("where proper supervision was not applied") but really I am just thinking "out loud"

I agree with you!
Aha!
post #68 of 182
It's interesting that so many give their LOs much more freedom than I do at home but way less when out in public. Then again DS is much better behaved when we are out and about because he is interested in (distracted by) all the people.

We let DS "run" a little ahead but within arms length and he knows not to go too fast we tell him to slow down if he doesn't it's cart time. We only go when it is not crowded for all of our sanity and he needs to stay in the very middle of the isle so he should not crash into any carts coming around the corner. If he starts getting crazy like wanting to grab stuff off the shelves it's cart time. He responds very well to these limits. It would be easier if he would just stay in the cart but he yells "too big" when we encourage it. He will ride in the cars at the grocery store I hate those big carts but he loves it because we don't have one of those push cars at home.
post #69 of 182
nope. from the very start, they sit in the cart and they stay there. it makes my life so much easier. DH learned that lesson the hard way. sometimes DS1 gets to walk around the store now that he's 3.5 but most times, he chooses to sit in the cart.
post #70 of 182
No we don't let Hunter run around in the store. Its dangerous and he'd probably knock things off the shelf.
post #71 of 182
Probably some would judge me in a store. I do what works for myself and my children, and I provide limits and supervision. I am not perfect, but mostly it works out.

My kids have special needs, so I know a lot of folks judge us already, but we have to make adaptations in our lives to help them manage. We try not to take our kids shopping too much, but sometimes it is impossible to avoid it...and honestly, I know it is good practice for them.

My kids may walk in the store if they are holding onto the cart (or basket). I try to involve them in shopping or pushing the cart (with my help), which gives them something to focus on and means they are far less likely to start sensory-seeking screaming (which is deafening and can happen in an instant if I am not vigilant in providing them with a multitude of sensory inputs...which in the store includes opportunities to interact with their environment).

I sometimes send them ahead, further down an aisle, to find a food with which they are familiar. dd's walk, due to her special needs, is closer to a run, but if she is purposefully and truly running or if she is not being careful or courteous of others, then I treat it as true running. Occassionally this happens...they run inappropriately, which often results in time within the cart followed by a re-try later.

If nobody is in an aisle we are in, and the store is not crowded (so it is unlikely folks will be joining us in the aisle), I do let my kids run up and down the aisle or push the cart around a bit if they watch where they are going and don't go to the end of the aisle (in case anyone turns into the aisle with their cart). They know that this is a "special occassions" thing and they have to ask permission from me first.

We re-cart if and when necessary, if behavior takes a turn for the downside.

Occassionally folks have to slow down and wait patiently for a minute while my kids get some yogurt out of the dairy shelf, yes, but I slow down and wait patiently also while a woman, my elder, does the same just as slowly for mobility limitations. It's a give and take, interacting in this intergenerational world full of people with diverse needs and challenges.

Kids are growing, learning human beings, and the best way for them to learn is through hands-on experiences. By shopping outside of the cart, they learn and practice a variety of life skills, including but not limited to:

*Safety: following me closely, staying on the correct side of the aisle for traffic flow, watching carefully for carts and people as well as other hazards, etc.

*Patience: waiting in cue to get something off the shelf when someone else is getting something, or to make purchases.

*Courtesies: saying excuse me as needed, using words like please and thank you, not pushing the cart too close to others, letting others pass as needed, and so forth.

I say do what works best for your family, but just make sure to provide appropriate limits and supervision.
post #72 of 182
Quote:
Originally Posted by LuxPerpetua View Post
Yes. And there is a difference between quietly exploring with a parent watching and running around and tearing up things. My child would scream bloody murder until she was 2.5 if I ever put her in a shopping cart (or a sling!) so I felt it would be more considerate to others and interesting for dd if she had her freedom.
Good point. My husband is usually with us in the store and he is the one who will let our 21 month old out of the cart. He is the most patient man I've ever known and he will follow our son around the entire time. Me - not so much. I'm not that patient and don't want to chase him plus I'm the one with the list so I push the cart. We live out and it takes us a while to get into town so by the time we are in the store and our son is out of his car seat...he's ready to move. Makes for a happier kid than one whining in the cart but that's just us. Of course when I'm alone then he stays in the cart but that is rare these days because I have a 5 month old too so it's either my husband with us or my two older children who help tremendously.
post #73 of 182
From the age that he was interested in it, I would let him walk next to me in the store or push the kid-cart if the store has one. But the rules are always:
1) stick with me
2) walk
3) ask mama before touching anything (this one we're still working on even now)

I wouldn't let him walk off away from me because:
1) he likes to run and would likely either accidentally run in front of someone and get hurt, or accidentally run in front of someone and trip the other person.
2) I like to know what things he has taken off the shelf and need to be put back
post #74 of 182
No and quite honestly it has as much to do with me being able to think straight as it does with the other reasons mentioned here.
post #75 of 182
It's gotten to the point where I can hardly take DS (3.5 years old) anywhere with me that doesn't have a shopping cart in the store. We were at Kohl's last week and he ran off - couldn't find him for 2 mins - felt like an eternity. I quickly finished up, checked out, had a very stern talk with him and we went home.

I'm hoping things change when the baby comes!
post #76 of 182
Quote:
Originally Posted by busymama77 View Post
It's gotten to the point where I can hardly take DS (3.5 years old) anywhere with me that doesn't have a shopping cart in the store. We were at Kohl's last week and he ran off - couldn't find him for 2 mins - felt like an eternity. I quickly finished up, checked out, had a very stern talk with him and we went home.

I'm hoping things change when the baby comes!
Yeah, we've had a lot of conversations about why we don't play hide and seek in public. I also distinctly remember hiding from my mother in one of those round clothing displays at about 4 years old.
post #77 of 182
Yeah, they roam or walk around if they want. They have clear limits, and no problems following them. (No running, no picking random things from shelves, staying close to the adult/s etc.)
They help with shopping mostly, that's what they think is the most fun, and they sometimes get their own little kid carts to push (if there are any) and resposibility of getting this or that food. They learn and grow on this. (We're talking the little ones here, 3.5-5.5 yo.)
post #78 of 182
You should never let your toddler run around a store. this is so dangerous. I work in a grocery store and I see so many toddlers get hurt.

1. there are often wet or slick spots on the store. out store has around the closk janitorial staff but they are spend all day keeping up.

2. i work night stock. i break a lot of glass. i get a lot of it up. not all of it. it could still be laying around.

3. the edges and corners of shelves are sharp.

4. the end caps are not always as stable as you think they are. they can take people removing and replacing items. they are not necessarily sturdy enough for toddlers to barrel into them or if she decides to grab something from the bottom it could crash the whole thing. I have sent them tumbling down before.

5. just because you can see your child doesn't mean everyone else can. and you might not mind if an elderly person creams your child but it would likely break their heart to hurt a baby.

A grocery store is not a play ground. letting children run around like it is one is dangerous to them and to others and is just plain rude.

not to mention you are allowing bad habits to form. if this is not acceptabl;e behavior every time you go to the store forever it should not be allowed. it is hard on kids when you give them freedom and then take it away randomly. it is much better (IMHO) to keep rules consistant regardless of who you are with.
post #79 of 182
I totally agree with lilyka. I see so many kids running ( or even walking near mama) getting into things, knocking stuff down. I've almost run into several kids and I am a really slow shopper. I won't even talk about how much I hate those **** Heelie shoe things that kids skate around stores in GROWL.

When my aunt was 2 my grandma took her to the store and she was playing with my mom (then 4). They weren't watching what they were doing, and Gma was distracted for a moment and my aunt knocked over an elderly woman. The woman was bruised but okay, but my grandma felt so horrible. Whenever I think about letting DS get out of the cart I think of that. That, and the fact that DS does his own thing and won't stay near me anyway But even if he would, I would not let him out of the cart until he outgrows the basket.

I remember getting lost TONS as a child because my mom didn't care where I was in the store. It was scary and I don't want to do that with Toby.
post #80 of 182
I used to do this when my dd was about that age. We lived in a small town and there was one smallish grocery store that was often pretty empty. Plus, she was really, really good about stopping and waiting whenever I asked and not running around the corners or out into the main aisle without me.

Nowadays, no way. I insist that they walk slowly and carefully if they walk, or they ride in the cart. Even my 4 year old makes me nervous because there are so many little old ladies at the store, and he's so big. I'm always worried he's going to plow into one.
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