or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Pregnancy and Birth › Birth and Beyond › Unassisted Childbirth › So at what point would you "give up"?
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

So at what point would you "give up"? - Page 3

post #41 of 64
Thread Starter 
Thanks for all the info and encouragement!!! It's been so great to hear that I'm not a crazy, out-of-control, risk taker and that there are so many others who safely cook their babies even longer. It's what I needed to hear. I do feel very good about baby...s/he's still kicking away in there...and I just was feeling so conflicted about going against "doctor's orders". Which is hysterical, if you think about it, given that I'm UCing, but my emotions have been so wild lately, I'm capable of some pretty irrational thought! We went to a friend's house 2 Sundays ago and I cried nearly the entire time. Why? Because I was supposed to already have had the baby (in my mind!) and I was feeling sorry for myself that I hadn't! I'm a mess! Anyway, it's so great that I can come here and get "the other side of the story". Thanks!!
post #42 of 64
I think at the end of pregnancy irrational thought is the ONLY kind of thought. At least I am finding that to be true LOL!
post #43 of 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by U-Turn View Post
Thanks for all the info and encouragement!!! It's been so great to hear that I'm not a crazy, out-of-control, risk taker and that there are so many others who safely cook their babies even longer. It's what I needed to hear. I do feel very good about baby...s/he's still kicking away in there...and I just was feeling so conflicted about going against "doctor's orders". Which is hysterical, if you think about it, given that I'm UCing, but my emotions have been so wild lately, I'm capable of some pretty irrational thought! We went to a friend's house 2 Sundays ago and I cried nearly the entire time. Why? Because I was supposed to already have had the baby (in my mind!) and I was feeling sorry for myself that I hadn't! I'm a mess! Anyway, it's so great that I can come here and get "the other side of the story". Thanks!!

Oh mama...you will never meet a mama more opposed to induction/helping things along than I am...My firm belief, is that, before about 43 weeks and without a medical reason to do so...there is no reason to try and augment the process.

Ask me where I was, at 41 weeks, during my last pregnancy?? Crying my eyes out at my friends house, cursing the heavens that I had to choose to know about and love natural birth, so I couldn't be like all those <sob> "lucky ladies with OB's who get to have inductions at 40 weeeeeeks!" <sob, sob> - yeah, sobbing. Totally irrational, ABSOLUTELY believed, that my baby was NEVER coming out....and that was only 41 weeks! I delivered at 41w1d.....that "extra" week and a day after my "due date", was the longest of my life...Loooooongest oooooffff mmmyyyy liiiiiiiiiffffe! I've NEVER known time to drag so slow, I've never known such overwhelming frustration and feeling of defeat....such incredible and all consuming desperation....looking back now, I can laugh at myself....but not too hard, because I know I will be back in that same frame of mind as I approach the final days of this pregnancy!! I'm only half way through at this point, and am already completely overwhelmed with anticipation, at the thought of getting to give birth again!

I just know I'm going to be the same way, blubbering to my DH "I'm just SO done, I want to be done with this....this baby is never coming!! I KNOW it!"

Funny thing is....it wasn't 24 hours after my baby was born, that I missed being pregnant!! My DH looked at me like I had *truly* lost my mind, when I rubbed my empty, flapping belly and said, "oooh, I miss it, I miss having my baby in me!" Oh well...I guess that's one reason he stands firm in his belief that I am a lunatic!

Good luck birthing queen...this really is going to happen for you so soon...I would say.....a few days from now, you will be holding a baby, thinking back to how badly you wanted that baby out and you will chuckle at yourself, at how anxious to meet your DC you were!! With all the activity you've had...yeah, definitely within a few days...not long now, sister!!
post #44 of 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by AverysMomma View Post
Funny thing is....it wasn't 24 hours after my baby was born, that I missed being pregnant!! My DH looked at me like I had *truly* lost my mind, when I rubbed my empty, flapping belly and said, "oooh, I miss it, I miss having my baby in me!" Oh well...I guess that's one reason he stands firm in his belief that I am a lunatic!!
Oh yeah I remember this feeling! So silly when the baby is sitting right there in your arms and is much more fun, but I totally missed having a little constant companion in my tummy too
post #45 of 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by AverysMomma View Post
Ask me where I was, at 41 weeks, during my last pregnancy?? Crying my eyes out at my friends house, cursing the heavens that I had to choose to know about and love natural birth, so I couldn't be like all those <sob> "lucky ladies with OB's who get to have inductions at 40 weeeeeeks!" <sob, sob> - yeah, sobbing.
I was induced at 41 weeks with my daughter. Certainly don't want to do THAT again. Talk about pain! 1 cm dilated, they break my water and crank up the pitocin. And I refused an epidural the entire time but it was torturous.

P.S. I only refused the epidural because I was more scared of a needle going into my spine than I was dying from the pain. LOL!
post #46 of 64
just checking in on you.... how are you doing?
post #47 of 64
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by HennyPenny View Post
just checking in on you.... how are you doing?
Good...went to the chiro yesterday just to make sure I was all lined up and ready to go. She showed dh some pressure points on my ankles to work on. No birth yet, but I'm feeling confident again, so that's okay!
post #48 of 64
This is the very reason I am telling people I am due 'the end of January' rather than giving my due date.

I hope all goes well with you and you have a fabulous delivery at the 'right' time!
post #49 of 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by Usually Curious View Post
This is the very reason I am telling people I am due 'the end of January' rather than giving my due date.

I hope all goes well with you and you have a fabulous delivery at the 'right' time!
yep me too! I hate feeling like a time bomb people are watching.
post #50 of 64
I've told everyone I know that i'm not expecting this kid before Halloween, because I'm not. I'm 40 weeks on Oct 11 according to LMP but not until the 14th by ovulation and honestly I don't expect to be concerned until that date passes... i'll be about 43 weeks according to lmp and ultrasound. I'm ubacing too so I feel your pain, but induction and vbac is a dangerous combo. Rupture rate is very high with hospital induction of a vbac and as much as I hate to admit it, you'd be better off with a planned repeat c-section if you feel like something is amiss. If I were in your shoes (and I fully expect to be, so be ready to talk me down in October!) I'd just wait it out until bub's ready to come on his own. Remember your risks of repeat c-section increase after 40 weeks but the rate of rupture does not, unless they hook you up to pitocin or cytotec. Hang in there and can't wait to hear your ubac story!
post #51 of 64
Are you communicating with the baby about it at all?

I don't think birth timing is *only* biological... of course OP may not share that belief... but I'd try communicating with the baby (about position, how you'll get through your birth together, how it will be when baby is born, assuring).
post #52 of 64
I think it would depend. If a woman had irregular, or very long, cycles then a 42 weeker might not be "overdue." 40 weeks is based on the polite fiction of all women having a perfect 28 day cycle. This is simply not true, and a woman needs to know what is normal for her. A woman who has a regular 35 day cycle has an extra week before ovulation, and wouldn't be "due" until 41 weeks, and an extra week would not put that woman at more risk than a 41 weeker with shorter cycles.

Now, on the other hand, if a woman has 28 day cycles, and is confident of conception at day 14, then I would encourage her to seek professional help at 42+ weeks. The problem is that professional help won't take other women into account and would be *freaking out* at 42w in this day and age. We live in a litigious time, and rational thought does not always apply to people who pay large premiums for malpractice insurance. 40 weeks is an average, not an experiation date. Good luck getting birth professional to admit that in the presence of a lawyer!
post #53 of 64
I am so glad to have this thread to follow..... I'm only 39weeks2days today, but it has helped my insane desperation immensely! I was induced at 41 weeks with my first, and wish I hadn't have gone that route, even though I was tired then. I know that I'll miss it when I'm not pregnant anymore, the lil weeble in my tummy is sure a nice companion---- i remember how empty I felt inside after giving birth last time. I'm just so tired and in so much pain, feel bad for wishing the time away and these last few weeks have moved sooooo slowly. I was really scared of seeing my due date come and go, worried about how that would feel if I'm feeling this way now. I really feel for you mama and hope you've got a little one right now Thanks so much to everyone that has shared on this thread---- it's really helped me to not be so hyper focused on my due date. Blessed Be!
post #54 of 64
post #55 of 64
sweet! thanks for the link!
post #56 of 64
Thread Starter 
Oh man...I knew I was forgetting a follow-up somewhere!

Yep, my little guy was born at 24 days late. I feel a teeny tiny bit like I somehow failed in the whole UC thing, but I cannot know how things would've turned out if I had stayed at home and so I'm okay with it all. There is always a next time (maybe)...and boy, oh boy, do I hope it's not another long, long back labor!!! I am, though, satisfied that I didn't give in to the pressure to induce and let him come in his own sweet time...and I have you all to thank for that!

Well, Josh is hungry, so I better be off!
post #57 of 64
having read the birth story, i do not think you "failed" in any way.

i think, for me, it's not possible to fail at having a UC because the cornerstone of UCing is following what you know to be true and getting help when you need it. you go in with the idea that a normal birth doesn't need an attendant, and if it becomes clear that your birth isn't normal, then guess what? you need one so you get one.

if anything, it's the most successful kind of UC to have!

i really liked how you and your husband worked together in the story to determine what the right course of action was. you knew where you wanted to go, but he was also deeply spiritually connected and, i believe, guided by the Spirit to follow where you knew you needed to be. I thought that whole bit was *really* profound.
post #58 of 64
having read the birth story, i do not think you "failed" in any way.

i think, for me, it's not possible to fail at having a UC because the cornerstone of UCing is following what you know to be true and getting help when you need it. you go in with the idea that a normal birth doesn't need an attendant, and if it becomes clear that your birth isn't normal, then guess what? you need one so you get one.

if anything, it's the most successful kind of UC to have!

i really liked how you and your husband worked together in the story to determine what the right course of action was. you knew where you wanted to go, but he was also deeply spiritually connected and, i believe, guided by the Spirit to follow where you knew you needed to be. I thought that whole bit was *really* profound.
post #59 of 64
He's beautiful! Congrats Mama.
post #60 of 64
Hmm I though I had posted congrats,


CONGRATS! He's beautiful and you did everything you could. My last uc ended up with a c-section too. It sucks but sometimes that is what needs to happen. 10% of births actually need a section, yours might have just been one of those *hugs*
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Unassisted Childbirth
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Pregnancy and Birth › Birth and Beyond › Unassisted Childbirth › So at what point would you "give up"?