Anyone else not get "checked"? - Page 3

[kawa kamuri]

no. not only is it pointless but also uncomfortable.

[leighann79]

I've always been checked from 36/37 weeks on with my doctor. I think with #3 I declined a couple of them. I plan on not getting checked at all this time. I probably will when I get to the birth center, but I don't want checks after that unless I feel the need for it. I won't have any "just because", yk?

[ChristineIndy]

My MW will do them for a suspected problem (I just had one at 24w for pre-pre-term labor) or if you request it.

But generally she doesn't do them at all. Actually, she says she does "visual cervical checks" during labor - that after a thousand births, she can tell by looking at your face how dilated you are, and be pretty darn close to right. I love my MW.

[Mamabeakley]

Also, if you'd really like that "information", you can check yourself

I was checked with sort of "standard" frequency during my first pg & birth.

Maybe 1x during my 2nd pg and then I checked myself frequently during my 2nd labor. And I really ought not to have been - I was GBS+, not treating, and my water was broken. But it was one of those "you do what you gotta do" things - for some reason I needed that "objective" measurement of where that labor was at to be able to get through. MW didn't check me except when I asked her to because I was pretty sure I had an anterior lip but wanted a second opinion - and then a half hour or so later I asked her to reduce the lip, which she did.

I checked myself out of curiosity when I was having contractions around 20 weeks - cervix was posterior and I couldn't reach it so I figured things were probably okay in there. I checked myself recently when I found some thick "pluggy" mucous on my undies - cervix is now forward, mushy, and fingertip dilated, which is fine with me at 34 weeks. I may allow an internal around 37 weeks IF MW is still having a hard time figuring out baby's position - for some reason this one is hard to palpate, and we're pretty sure it's head-down but it would be nice to be sure since we'd change some things if there is a breech baby in there!

[CrunchyMamaToBe]

I think it's relatively common for US OBs to do vaginal exams at 36+ week appointments, but they're by no means necessary.

I only had one vaginal exam in my first pregnancy, in labor, at my request.

[SashaBear]

With my first we did checks starting at GBS test and then every week after that. Sometimes more than once a week. But I had pre-e and they were checking to see if could be induced. There were some days I was checked at the beginning of the day and the end of the day. Those were the days I was hospitalized for observation. I was checked often because of my epidural.

With my second I wasn't checked until 41w1d to see if I was ready for induction. Baby wasn't moving. I was checked often because of my epidural

[amydiane]

I just got back from my 37 week appointment, and the OB said they'd start checking my cervix next week. I asked what for, and she gave a vague answer like, "Just checking on things." I could have pressed it, but we hadn't gone over my birth plan yet and I wanted to keep the confrontations down if possible. I still plan on declining next week, unless someone can give me a really good reason for it, which I doubt.

[SandraS]

Why do I read, over and over again, that making your wishes known is considered "confrontational"?

I watched a TIVO'd version of The Doctors yesterday, and one of them said, several times, YOU ARE IN CHARGE WHEN YOU ARE IN THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE. He reiterated this. Over and over again.

Making your wishes known (no exams, no tests, whatever) isn't confrontational. It's making a decision with your doctor about your wishes. If your doctor doesn't partner with you, you absolutely MUST find a new one. You are paying THEM for a service, not the other way around. They are not superior to you. They are not on a pedestal. They cannot force you to do anything. They do not always know what is best for you. I don't care about that piece of paper on the wall - my accountant has one too, but he makes mistakes.

Saying "no" is not confrontational. Period.

[evinmom]

I didn't have any checks with DD's pregnancy and do not plan to this time either. With my DS, I had lots of checks and none of them were to any benefit. I was walking around at 5 cm dilated and 80% effaced and still wasn't in labor. When I was 3 cm dilated, the OB kept saying that I would go into labor anytime. A bunch of bologna. I learned after that there was no point in checking for "progress."

[amydiane]

Originally Posted by SandraS

Why do I read, over and over again, that making your wishes known is considered "confrontational"?

I watched a TIVO'd version of The Doctors yesterday, and one of them said, several times, YOU ARE IN CHARGE WHEN YOU ARE IN THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE. He reiterated this. Over and over again.

Making your wishes known (no exams, no tests, whatever) isn't confrontational. It's making a decision with your doctor about your wishes. If your doctor doesn't partner with you, you absolutely MUST find a new one. You are paying THEM for a service, not the other way around. They are not superior to you. They are not on a pedestal. They cannot force you to do anything. They do not always know what is best for you. I don't care about that piece of paper on the wall - my accountant has one too, but he makes mistakes.

Saying "no" is not confrontational. Period.

Well, I don't think it should be confrontational, and maybe I shouldn't have used that word, but in my experience (and it sounds like a lot of other people's), doctors are used to patients going along with what they say. It doesn't mean that it's necessarily right, but it does seem to be the norm. So if you tell them you want to do something differently, especially when they strongly believe their way to be the best course of action, they can be taken aback and probably wonder why you're going to them if you're not going to follow their advice.

In my case, it's a very long story, but DH wasn't comfortable with homebirth, I got risked out of the birth center due to GD, and these are the most natural-friendly OBs I could find who would even talk to me in the 3rd trimester. I do trust that they're good people who truly want the best outcomes, but I don't always agree with the medical model, so I'm not going to just blindly follow them either. I went over our birth preferences with them to see what their reactions were so I'd know ahead of time what they weren't agreeable to and therefore what I'll have to stand up for when the time comes, and also because I think they should know ahead of time where we're coming from. But I see no point in debating over being "allowed" to eat and drink in labor right now, for example.

[momoftworedheads]

I have not been checked at all this time. I go in about 3 weeks for the GBS testing and I have to remind my Dr that I do not want him to check for dilation, etc. I am one of those people who can walk around 4 cm dilated for a month. No reason to check when labor is not imminent.

Take care all!

Jen

[Turquesa]

Originally Posted by SandraS

Why do I read, over and over again, that making your wishes known is considered "confrontational"?

I watched a TIVO'd version of The Doctors yesterday, and one of them said, several times, YOU ARE IN CHARGE WHEN YOU ARE IN THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE. He reiterated this. Over and over again.

Making your wishes known (no exams, no tests, whatever) isn't confrontational. It's making a decision with your doctor about your wishes. If your doctor doesn't partner with you, you absolutely MUST find a new one. You are paying THEM for a service, not the other way around. They are not superior to you. They are not on a pedestal. They cannot force you to do anything. They do not always know what is best for you. I don't care about that piece of paper on the wall - my accountant has one too, but he makes mistakes.

Saying "no" is not confrontational. Period.

What she said. Especially in an obstetric/gyn context.

My rule: It's your cr0tch. Access to it is a privilege and not a right. If anybody apart from a spouse or lover wants such access (OK, even them! ) they'd better have a good reason why before you consent.

I told both my DH and my doula that if my homebirth ends in a hospital transfer, any time they see somebody setting up a machine, preparing a needle and/or approaching my nether-regions, they need to find out why and make sure I'm OK with it.

[PatchChild]

I always said no and never had a problem. My basic argument was that I could be at 0 and go into labor that night or 5 and not have the kid for a week, so I really didn't care. The information wasn't useful for anything.