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how much do you do? - Page 2

post #21 of 26
Wow mama, you are doing a LOT! At 5 months I just took care of the babies and I think I cleaned up after dinner and did laundry. DH cooked dinner and we hired someone to clean once a week. I didn't go back to work until they were 14 months old. You are doing a LOT, I can't believe your DH is giving you flack!
post #22 of 26
I was thinking more about this thread and I had two more thoughts.

One -- Is your husband adjusting to being the primary income earner? I know that was a difficult psychological adjustment for my husband -- to have it all fall on his shoulders. I also think in retrospect that my DH didn't really bond with our babies until they could *do* something. So he may be struggling with his role as primary income earner & not quite bonded with his babies yet.

Two -- I thought 5 months was a hard age. I was ready for them to be able to do something -- sit up and chew on a toy, something like that. They took up a lot of time, more so than they did a month or two later when they could sit up and I could chat with them while they played and I folded laundry. Also, the time with them is precious. You're not going to get it back & your job is them, if that makes sense. Not that you have to ignore everything else and stare at them all day, but before you know it, they'll be big and their baby selves will be a memory and it's gone. I know I'm rambling, but face time with them, playing, reading, singing is so important.

Anyway, I hope he can understand where you're coming from. I told my DH all you were doing and he was impressed!
post #23 of 26
i have 4 month old twins, a 4 year old, and a 2 year old. while my husband is at work i do all baby and child care (obviously) and try to fix dinner or at the very least make plans for dinner. i often do laundry as well, and supervise the kids cleaning while i hold/nurse babies. most of my day is taken up by nursing/diaper changes/getting babies to sleep/fixing meals/snacks for the big kids/activities for the big kids etc. for housework i usually take a car full of kids (sometimes 2, sometimes all 4) away from the house so hubby can do some cleaning. for the most part we just try to keep the house healthy and safe - not clean most of the time.
post #24 of 26
Thread Starter 
thanks for all of your input! it's so interesting to see what everyone is juggling.

i've pretty much come to the conclusion that he is just totally stressed out from work or whatever, and has no one else to take it out on but me. which i have no interest in. so i'm just going to have to be a little more tough and do more of my own thing, which is fine. i know i'm doing the right thing, working hard and keeping the kinder happy which is all that really matters. i'm happy, i think i'm doing great, and if he doesn't agree then whatever.

with those 2 hrs i stay up at night i'm going to start focusing on myself more.

sucks for him
post #25 of 26
Quote:
Originally Posted by dividedsky View Post
i know i'm doing the right thing, working hard and keeping the kinder happy which is all that really matters. i'm happy, i think i'm doing great, and if he doesn't agree then whatever.

Glad you've found some peace. I know you weren't intending to speak to me w/ that statement, but I needed to hear that advice.
post #26 of 26
Yeah, I've also been meaning to add that 5 months is a tough age. Just sit up, already!!!!
And as DH lost his job shortly after the twins were born, I can appreciate the stress of being the breadwinner.........
hugs again, mama. You rock!
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