or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Mom › Parenting › Why won't they just lock her in her room at night?
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Why won't they just lock her in her room at night?

post #1 of 90
Thread Starter 
I'm not a fan of locking her in a room at night...

But, these parents sleep through everything.

She's two, and she gets up at night. Every night. She has...

Colored on herself with sharpies (repeadetly)

Gotten Dad's razor that in the SAME ROOM AS MOM AND DAD, and cut her hand up.

Been found asleep on the kitchen counters with a fully eaten box of poptarts.

Eats all the food she can find.

Leaves the fridge open all night.

has opened the back door. Left that open.

It's only a matter of time before she eats something dangerous, or heaven forbid opens the front door?

She's not a normal two year old. I think she can scale walls. Eventually she will learn to unlock even the highest lock.

They have a pool What if she figures out the lock to the pool gate? She swims like a fish.. but what if she hurts herself then falls in?

I have offered to help them rearrange the bedrooms so that she can sleep alone in one room, and I will GIVE them a baby gate (or two) to lock her in safely. They can put a lock on the outside of her door. They can remove everything dangerous, so she can get up and play if she wants.

If they cant/wont wake up when she's tearing the house apart...even when she's in their own room... shouldn't they take precautions to keep her safe? She does this every single night. It's not occasionally. It's every night.
post #2 of 90
That is scarry! They don't need to actually lock her in her room. They make alars for doors and windows that cost very little. They could just put one on her door and close it at night and then turn the alarm on. That way if she wakes and tries to leave her room the alarm will wake the parents so they can usher her back to bed.

I can't believe that the parents aren't more concerned about this.
post #3 of 90
nak

instead of locking her in- which i'm not completely against as a very last resort- how about one of those door alarms that go off when the door is opened? or the parents setting an alarm clock for a bit before she normally wakes up?

i had to put slide locks at the top of my outside doors to make ds4 didn't escape- he did once before luckily the police found him.
post #4 of 90
why aren't they waking up during this? are they drug users or something?

it's really really scary that they aren't more concerned.
post #5 of 90
When my oldest started doing this, we put a child proof door knob cover on the inside of his door. It seemed like a mean thing to do but we had to keep him safe.

I was terrified that he would leave the house.
post #6 of 90
Quote:
Originally Posted by readytobedone View Post
why aren't they waking up during this? are they drug users or something?
My DS could do it without waking me up and I had an infant. He was being sneaky.
post #7 of 90
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by readytobedone View Post
why aren't they waking up during this? are they drug users or something?

it's really really scary that they aren't more concerned.

No. They try to work opposite shifts, so I think they are just really tired. And, they just sleep through it. I don't know how. I hear everything. So, I don't understand it.

But, still.. if you know this is GOING to happen, why not find a way to put a stop to it?

I don't think those alarms would wake them up either. If she was rummaging in the master bathroom without waking anybody, I doubt they'd hear an alarm on her door.
post #8 of 90
can two year olds be sneaky?
post #9 of 90
Quote:
Originally Posted by funkymamajoy View Post
My DS could do it without waking me up and I had an infant. He was being sneaky.
But you had a reasonable response of extreme concern and taking action to prevent it from happening again. The lack of concern on the part of the parents discussed in the OP is terrifying!
post #10 of 90
We recently had a three year old in our general area who was very badly injured when he was hit by a car - at 1 in the morning. He got out. It was tragic.
post #11 of 90
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1littlebit View Post
can two year olds be sneaky?
She's not very good at it. Which just means she doesn't care, and sees no reason to sneak.. since she's planning to do it anyway.

But, yes. Two year olds can be sneaky. They just don't hide it well.
post #12 of 90
Quote:
Originally Posted by nextcommercial View Post
No. They try to work opposite shifts, so I think they are just really tired. And, they just sleep through it. I don't know how. I hear everything. So, I don't understand it.

But, still.. if you know this is GOING to happen, why not find a way to put a stop to it?

I don't think those alarms would wake them up either. If she was rummaging in the master bathroom without waking anybody, I doubt they'd hear an alarm on her door.
Why do they have to put her in her own room? They could just put an alarm on the door to the masterbedroom and keep co-sleeping. That way they are closer to the alarm and may hear it better. And their daughter doesn't loose the benefits of co-sleeping.
post #13 of 90
We put a lock on the inside of the playroom door and our door stays locked. The girls have access to their bedroom, the back bathroom (only the toilet because we turned off the water to the sink) and the playroom with their toys.

The lock is at the absolute highest point on the door, because they figured out how to unlock a regular lock, popped the doorknob cover open using a toy as a crowbar, and used toys to stack and climb to get the first lock unlatched.

I am a heavy sleeper - so is my husband. At one point we set an alarm but then it would wake the kids up if they weren't awake when the alarm went off, making them crabby and miserable until nap time.

You have to do something to keep your kids safe - even if it means they are locked in somewhere separate from where you are. If one of the girls falls or gets hurt (or if they just get hungry) they come knock on our door and wake us up. But generally they prefer to have time to themselves without parents being around and when we wake up they know they'll get breakfast right away and snugs and love...so it's worked out well for us.

Of course it probably helps there are two of them (3 and 4) I don't know how it would work with just one...but if there are safe toys and board books available, a little independent play time is not a bad thing, in my opinion.

Oh - for safety purposes the girls' beds don't have frames and we took the doors off the closet (they played with them and we got scared) so other than safe stuff it's pretty sparse in the playroom and their bedroom and the back bathroom.
post #14 of 90
This was one reason I had for cosleeping -- I remember wandering the house in the dead of night as a child.
post #15 of 90
Close friends of ours had a similar problem with their youngest who would get into all sorts of trouble in the middle of the night. The worst being he would leave house and wander the neighborhood. It was crazy.

They had a pool and lived on a heavily travelled street. The kid would leave the house in the middle of the night and wander about at 3-4 years old. Sometimes a neighbor would find him, other times the only clue was a wide-open door.

Their attitude was la la la, oh gee, he got out again? I never understood it.

The parents should be able to find wireless door/window alarms at any major retailer for $5 a peice.
post #16 of 90
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by AstridS View Post
Why do they have to put her in her own room? They could just put an alarm on the door to the masterbedroom and keep co-sleeping. That way they are closer to the alarm and may hear it better. And their daughter doesn't loose the benefits of co-sleeping.

She's always had her own room. But, once she started climbing out of her crib, they took it down and got her a twin bed.
post #17 of 90
Jennidecki: I'm so sorry, don't take this the wrong way...but imagining your kids using a toy as a crowbar to pop a locked door...had me in between fits of laughter and sheer terror at what is to come for me, on my own parenting path! Your kids sound like hethens(sp)!! (the GOOD kind! the kind I hope to have!)

As for us....my DH is a very light sleeper...I used to be a heavier sleeper, like...could sleep through ANYTHING heavy...now, since having a baby, my ears are fine tuned to any of the noises associated with babies/sneaking around, etc...my DD is 13 mos old...she is extremely sneaky...it is SO funny to watch! She;ll look at me in the night, decide that I'm sleeping...and roll over, then look at me again...roll over again, so her feet are hanging off the bed...then, she looks at me and sloooooowly sliiiides backward, off the bed, with the funniest face on her, wide eyes, mouth scrunched up into a tiny "o"...(it is SO hard to pretend to be sleeping while she's doing this...and if she can make out the tiniest little smile on my face, she knows I'm awake and will start laughing) and then, her little head disappears...and she's LOOSE! She quietly craaawwwlls out of the room and goes t find her toys!

I know she's sneaking, because she goes sooo slowly off the bed, when we both knows she can practically JUMP down....that and because she crawls quietly out of the room...when she's not "sneaking" she NEVER crawls..she knows how to walk and is almost running! So...she is trying not to wake me...whether it's to be nice, or to try and get away with mischief, I don't know...either way it's cute as hell.


OP....this baby child waking up on the counter, box of eaten poptarts next to her...FREAKS me out...the first time that happens, it's funny....there doens't need to be a second time, for the reason mentioned by another poster...once a kid learns the basic function of door locks, etc they can get into and out of ANYTHING...including the front door. Something that stands 3 feet off the ground, should NOT be wandering outside, alone, in the night...that's a recipe for terrible, terrible tragedy.

I don't know what to tell you to DO, because I'm not a huge fan of getting in other peoples business and telling them what to do....but I'd say bring up with them, next time you're around, that a lady you know, told you about a three year old who got out and was hit by a car and that it reminded you of their little one and made you worry...mention the door alarm, etc...but beyond that, I wouldn't push with them...I know it's hard to bite your tongue at stuff like this...
post #18 of 90
I would be concerned that the parents DON'T seem concerned!

A couple of years ago my DH called me from work just devastated. He had just gotten a call that the 2 yo son of his cousin had drowned. The little boy had woken up before his parents did, let himself out the front door, and made his way to a nearby pond. It CAN and DOES happen.
post #19 of 90
wow, if my kid got out like that i would have them sleep in my room at least. then lock us all in. that way id they do wake up i will still be there.

i wake up at every little sound though. DD turns over in her bed in her room and i wake up.

with DS though, i slept through it. the morning i woke up to find my 2 yo DS on top of the fridge with hot cocoa mix all over him, was the day i bought a gate to put in his doorway. that way he could yell to make me wake up, play in his safe room, but not get out. that scared me. i tell him that story all the time. he thinks it is funny. it is now, but not then. he was such a monkey boy. DD is the same, but i wake easier now for some reason....
post #20 of 90
@AverysMomma I feel the SAME way!!! I'm proud and horrified all at once. You want to be all, "No! Don't do that!" but you kind of WANT them to do that because it encourages learning and exploration and....yeah...I'm screwed...LOL (am I allowed to say that on the board? I'm sorry if that's considered cussing)

I thought of something else. This might be a wee bit extreme, but you could call the police. As a formerly falsely-accused victim of the child services system I cringe to say it out loud...but...better that than a dead kid.

I remember the first time my 1.5yo got out of the house - when the people at the end of the walk she'd gone out to play with brought her back to the front door I swear I died a little inside...and put a lock on the inside of the door.

(Yes, my house has latch locks EVERYWHERE - it's fun to watch guests try and get out of the house or into rooms that are locked - they forget...)
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Parenting
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Mom › Parenting › Why won't they just lock her in her room at night?