Chat thread July 9-16 - Page 4

[lil_miss_understood]

Originally Posted by Quate

Thanks for the encouragement everyone. We've been paying visits to the LC every 1-2 weeks since she was born. She helped me with positioning, and that reduced the pain to bearable and got our feeding sessions so that they weren't fights. And finally, after a whole series of things we tried, the gaping wounds have healed up. I guess all along I assumed that then the pain would go away. But we're still dealing with pain and blisters and cracked, sometimes bleeding nipples, and I've just gotten really discouraged, especially when, say, I can't comfort her very well b/c I can't hold her against my shoulder, or I can't use the Moby, or I lay awake in bed for an hour while she's happily sleeping away. I'm going to ask about tongue tie as some people have suggested. My memory is a little hazy--I think they checked her at the hospital and maybe the LC did too, but our ped is also a certified LC, so I'll ask at our 2 mo appointment next week.

On a happier note, she slept through the night last night! Granted, the night was 12:30-6:30, but we'll take what we can get As she was going back down for her nap this morning, she just smiled and smiled and smiled at me. So cute. I love it when I actually have a happy baby.

I would post in your Tribal Area asking for recommendations of people who've dx'd a posterior TT. From what I've been told, people who are familiar with them are few and far between and they're not as obvious as the other type... I still have to do that myself. (Pot, meet kettle. )

[kdtmom2be]

Sorry to hear that some of you are still having pain while nursing. With my first, I had unbearable pain while nursing. Everyone kept telling me that I shouldn't have pain but then also saying that what I was experiencing was normal. SO frustrating! I was sure that DD had a posterior tongue tie, but no one could/would diagnose her. She had the characteristic heart-shaped tongue when she cried. I stuck with it and am still nursing her (pleasepleasepleaseweansoon!!) to this day. The good news is that the pain DID let up... around 6-8 months or so? Maybe a little longer? Even with no intervention.

DS seems to have a shallow/weak latch and he "clicks" when he nurses (as well?). He's thriving and not causing me any pain so I am hesitant for anyone to try to "fix" it. I'll ask the LLLL at the next meeting, first meeting I've been to since he was born, and see what she says. I can't get into my doctor for his 2 or 3 month appointment because the doctor is away until mid September. (We usually just do 3, 6 and 12 instead of 2, 4, 6 and 12 month appointments.)

[Auraji]

Im in a bad mood!

It's been 6 HOT days with no a/c. My mom keeps calling me everyday, which I like until she says things like "Do you still have a gut?", "you need to even sleep with a bra, your breasts are gonna sag", "you need to comb Sophia's hair forward to cover her big forehead"....

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

How can someone that is in another country drive me so crazy? I love my mom, she just annoys me sometimes.

Im annoyed at DP too, he just doesnt know it. Yesterday we went swimming to the pool because it was so hot, he spent the whole time acting like a little kid (it had been years since he had been swimming) and I was the one that held Sophia all the time. After he made me wake her up so we could go and she was grumpy!

I think it's the heat that has me so grumpy and that Im hungry. Sophia is definitely a very high-needs baby. I cannot, cannot put her dpwn and it's stressing me out. DP thinks playing with her for 1 hour a day is helping enough. I mean he always holds her when I ask him to, I just hate that I have to ask. Unless he feels like playing with her. He spends so much time playing video games and I feel like it's very unfair. I like being a mom and taking care of my daughter, but sometimes I need some me time and I hate I usually only get it after I put her to sleep and Im already burnt out and dont feel like doing anything.

Sophia has her ups and downs, the past few days have been crazy. Im sure it's the heat too. We keep taking baths together and that's usually the best part of my day.

[CanBoo]

We are doing well, but HOT! We are now using soothers. Not too sure it happened ...

I don't get DD2's elimination pattern. Anyone having a super erratic baby? Like poop every 2-3 days for a couple weeks, then daily for a few days, no poop for 5 days, and then twice a day. WTH???

Managed to get the guts to put her on my back in the new wrap this week. I have done it three times so far. It is so much easier to get anything done that way. Quite proud of myself.

Originally Posted by Auraji

It's been 6 HOT days with no a/c. My mom keeps calling me everyday, which I like until she says things like "Do you still have a gut?", "you need to even sleep with a bra, your breasts are gonna sag", "you need to comb Sophia's hair forward to cover her big forehead"....

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

How can someone that is in another country drive me so crazy? I love my mom, she just annoys me sometimes.

It could be worse, she could live next door and buy you night bras and come and comb Sophia's hair. At least on the phone you can just say yeah yeah yeah and brush it off.

About your DP, sOrry guys just don't get it. Unless I actually say very specifically what I need my, oh so caring DH, or would not get it either. He has mastered the art of holding a baby and a video game controller though

Originally Posted by kdtmom2be

DS seems to have a shallow/weak latch and he "clicks" when he nurses (as well?). He's thriving and not causing me any pain so I am hesitant for anyone to try to "fix" it. I'll ask the LLLL at the next meeting, first meeting I've been to since he was born, and see what she says. I can't get into my doctor for his 2 or 3 month appointment because the doctor is away until mid September. (We usually just do 3, 6 and 12 instead of 2, 4, 6 and 12 month appointments.)

I am lucky and I am not too familiar with nursing pain. Except for the one of a toddler after she get her latch all screwed up after taking a bottle :
Not intending to go to any 2 months appointment either. I know she is doing well. Di and I thought the meeting was yesterday. We had decided not to do a playdate since we'd see each other yesterday... That wasn't very bright on our part.

[Auraji]

We are doing well, but HOT! We are now using soothers. Not too sure it happened ...

I don't get DD2's elimination pattern. Anyone having a super erratic baby? Like poop every 2-3 days for a couple weeks, then daily for a few days, no poop for 5 days, and then twice a day. WTH???

Sophia is like that. No pattern at all, Im starting to think her elimination depends on what I eat. She sure goes a lot, whenever I eat beans.

It could be worse, she could live next door and buy you night bras and come and comb Sophia's hair. At least on the phone you can just say yeah yeah yeah and brush it off.

About your DP, sOrry guys just don't get it. Unless I actually say very specifically what I need my, oh so caring DH, or would not get it either. He has mastered the art of holding a baby and a video game controller though

I know, but she plans to come visit and stay with us for probably over a month. Im not sure. So I'll hear those kind of things 24/7, I guess I'll just have to tell her I know, no need to say it again. The good is that she'll help me around the house.

Everybody tells me that, I just hate asking for things. It's funny you mention video games, that's why I've been mad.

[OceansEve]

Guys - The key to a successful marriage - tell him EXACTLY what you need. Don't hope he'll see how frustrated you are a be the knight in shining armor . "Hun - I need a break and you need to spend some quality time with DC too, so I'm gonna take a walk/shower/run to the store etc"

mothers - I get the cut their hair lecture all the time from both mom and MIL.

[LiLStar]

lol, its so true that you need to be specific. dh could be on his way out the door, shopping list in hand, and i'll say "oh! and we're out of milk!" (and he definitely hears/acknowledges) and he'll come home... without milk. Why? BEcause I never said, "can you pick up some milk?"

[~Katie~]

Originally Posted by OceansEve

Guys - The key to a successful marriage - tell him EXACTLY what you need. Don't hope he'll see how frustrated you are a be the knight in shining armor . "Hun - I need a break and you need to spend some quality time with DC too, so I'm gonna take a walk/shower/run to the store etc"

mothers - I get the cut their hair lecture all the time from both mom and MIL.

:

You really have to spell it out. Don't ask for help. Simply hand them the baby and walk away. I think its hard because you spend the majority of the day with the baby and get used to parenting your way, and its difficult to watch them do it their way but trust me when I say that they'll figure it out. With DH, I offer suggestions on how to interact with DS if I hear screaming going on and 9 times out of 10 it works. Babywearing isn't just for moms either, I have many a picture of DS in the Moby with DH. Whether intentional or not, they won't offer help so its up to you to create the expectation that they'll share in parenting duties. I know as a first time mom I envisioned DH taking a 50/50 role with parenting and it wasn't so until I made it happen. Now he gets that I need to recharge my batteries once he's home from work for the day, so he takes over parental duties until bed time. You don't want to get to the point where you explode because you feel overwhelmed, I CANNOT stress the importance of taking down-time for yourself to recharge your batteries. You will be a better mother and partner if you maintain your sense of self.

[kdtmom2be]

Originally Posted by LiLStar

lol, its so true that you need to be specific. dh could be on his way out the door, shopping list in hand, and i'll say "oh! and we're out of milk!" (and he definitely hears/acknowledges) and he'll come home... without milk. Why? BEcause I never said, "can you pick up some milk?"

I think we're married to the same man!
On time, he HAD it on his list and I saw him come home, pull in the driveway, pull out of the driveway, come back home 20 minutes later and come in the house. He had forgotten it anyways and had gone back to get it because he knew I would be mad!!!

My mother lives 3000 miles away and I wish she lived closer, my MIL lives in my driveway and there are days I wish she lived 3000 miles away! (But when she did I wished she lived closer... absence makes the heart grow fonder?) At least neither of them comment on my parenting.

[LiLStar]

oh and what about buying stuff that you totally don't need at all just because its on sale? Like when dh bought a gallon of organic milk that was marked down to like $2.75 (we usually pay around $3 for 1/2 gallon) and expires in 2 days. we go through maybe 1/2 gal a week, and had a mostly full carton at home! sooo most of that went down the drain.

another funny.. i think it might have been a birthday party or holiday or something. sil sends my bro to go get some ice cream he comes home with 3 cartons. sil gets annoyed "but, it was buy 2 get 1 free!" "so? we dont need 3!" and he says, "yeah, and i know how you d ont like when i buy stuff just because its on sale, so when i saw the paper towels for b1g1 free, i didnt get them!" "but we NEED paper towels!" ..lol. my poor brother just couldnt win.

[j_p_i]

Originally Posted by KatieJD

:

You really have to spell it out. Don't ask for help. Simply hand them the baby and walk away. I think its hard because you spend the majority of the day with the baby and get used to parenting your way, and its difficult to watch them do it their way but trust me when I say that they'll figure it out. With DH, I offer suggestions on how to interact with DS if I hear screaming going on and 9 times out of 10 it works. Babywearing isn't just for moms either, I have many a picture of DS in the Moby with DH. Whether intentional or not, they won't offer help so its up to you to create the expectation that they'll share in parenting duties. I know as a first time mom I envisioned DH taking a 50/50 role with parenting and it wasn't so until I made it happen. Now he gets that I need to recharge my batteries once he's home from work for the day, so he takes over parental duties until bed time. You don't want to get to the point where you explode because you feel overwhelmed, I CANNOT stress the importance of taking down-time for yourself to recharge your batteries. You will be a better mother and partner if you maintain your sense of self.

I like this. We're still working on balance, though its getting better now that the house is done. For awhile it was me with Olivia 24/7 while DH worked on the house. Even if she was super fussy and I really needed a break, I felt so frustrated! But the house stuff had to get done, so I didn't ask for help very much.

Things are good here otherwise. I feel incredibly lucky to have no pain while breastfeeding. Generally Olivia is an easy baby I think, she has her fussy evenings but I'm learning what she likes and what will soothe her. Though it's tiring to walk in circles around the house bouncing her in an upright position only (it has to be just that way!) at least it's extra exercise!

[Mama Rana]

Originally Posted by LiLStar

another funny.. i think it might have been a birthday party or holiday or something. sil sends my bro to go get some ice cream he comes home with 3 cartons. sil gets annoyed "but, it was buy 2 get 1 free!" "so? we dont need 3!" and he says, "yeah, and i know how you d ont like when i buy stuff just because its on sale, so when i saw the paper towels for b1g1 free, i didnt get them!" "but we NEED paper towels!" ..lol. my poor brother just couldnt win.

THIS is why they invented cell phones.

[Auraji]

I took you wise girls advice

Last night DP made dinner, cleaned the kitchen, played with Sophia AND put her to sleep! That's a first, he even did a better job than me, she didnt wake after he put her down.

Also we slept downstairs because it's cooler here. He got a fan, put sheets and pillows in the sofa bed. Got a fan.

Sophia went to sleep at almost 12! But she slept until almost 12, isnt that crazy? She woke up like 4 times to eat, but would go right back to sleep and is sleeping now. Her second nap of the day.

And guys and buying stuff. DP bought 4 cactus and a bamboo when he was at the store. I like them. He came home with one, then he went back to buy another because it was lonely, but he came home with two, because he felt bad for the other one and then went and bought another one today, because it was a star catcus and he needed to have it AND wanted to get more bamboo.

That was after he bought himself 3 new video games (he went to buy one, but it was buy 2 get one free).

And then he says I buy too many things

I cant send DP grocery shopping, he'll come home with something for dinner and spend the rest of his money on red bull (for him) and a million different kinds of juice. Im like ok... you know that we need food for ALL of the week?

[CanBoo]

Bad bad day...
Things were already not that great and then our big cat got mauled by a Jack Russell. Don't think he's gonna make it. Posted in toddlers about it, not too sure how to handle it with DD1.

We are very sad. He had survived getting hit by a truck years ago and has always been very special to everyone since.

DD2 has been back to daily puking since her last chiro appointment. WTH? : It seemed to help so much with the first two visits.

[j_p_i]

Originally Posted by CanBoo

Bad bad day...
Things were already not that great and then our big cat got mauled by a Jack Russell. Don't think he's gonna make it. Posted in toddlers about it, not too sure how to handle it with DD1.

We are very sad. He had survived getting hit by a truck years ago and has always been very special to everyone since.

DD2 has been back to daily puking since her last chiro appointment. WTH? : It seemed to help so much with the first two visits.

so sorry mama, I know how attached we get to our pets.

[OceansEve]

New thread...

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...7#post14107197

not that we talk that much