updating again.Thank you mamas for all the kind thoughts!
I am still feeling quite overwhelmed but am trying to take one day at a time and not stress too much about it.
I feel like I can't tell anyone IRL about what we are planning because it's a bit nuts. My husband and I have researched at great length our rights in this and plan to refuse a C-section up until 42 weeks. He has not been able to find another doctor who will VBAC me and he is not allowed to drop my care. So, I am still going for my weekly checkups and they have started doing NST's just to monitor baby's heart. Everything is fine- baby is healthy and I plan to continue to refuse C-section and see if my body will go into labor. I will be 40 weeks on Monday and PRAYING that baby boy comes out before 42 weeks and that he stays happy, healthy and thriving in my uterus.
My doctor CAN refuse to deliver me vaginally once I arrive at the hospital laboring however the hospital CANNOT refuse me A doctor to deliver me. It's a scary situation to be in as far as the uncertainty of doctor however I feel that I am making the right decision for myself and my baby. I will not be forced to be cut open. I will listen to my body. If, at any point, it becomes dangerous to my baby, then I will consider a section. That is my last option.
Being confident in my decision does not mean that this is not hard still. I hate having to go to my doctors office and be seen as 'the uncooperative patient.' It seems as if the whole office is now aware of the situation(especially because no one has ever refused a section before)and comments keep being made.
"When are you having your C-section?" "I am not having a C-section, I am VBACing."
The responses I get when this comes up from other midwifes, nurses, even the fricking receptionist are ridiculous. I am so ready to be done with going there. Some BIG complaints are in the works for after this baby is born.
Anyway, enough babbling. Just wanted to give the most recent update. If you pray, please do so for our family. We still have quite the battle ahead of us!