"You know you won't get a medal for that" Rant! - Page 5

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by Storm Bride

Okay...so I butted back in.

I walked into the hospital this time, and there were hand sanitizing stations everywhere. They all had warning signs about the dangers of exposing the patients to a cough or cold or any kinds, etc. etc. How on earth do people walk past that kind of thing and feel safe?? I almost ran in the other direction.

I've continued to follow this thread, and had a further thought about this. I think it's perceptions. I think some people see the hand sanitizing stations and "please wash your hands" signs and all that, and think "it's so nice to be in a facility that maintains such high standards of hygiene and sterility". Other people (like me) look at all that, and think, "OMG - they're really having trouble keeping infections out of here!". It seems to depend on whether people focus on the steps being taken to keep things clean...or on why so many steps need to be taken. To me, those signs don't say "this is a sterile environment" - they say "we really want this to be a sterile environment, but we know it's not". Ouch.

[Juvysen]

Originally Posted by Storm Bride

I've continued to follow this thread, and had a further thought about this. I think it's perceptions. I think some people see the hand sanitizing stations and "please wash your hands" signs and all that, and think "it's so nice to be in a facility that maintains such high standards of hygiene and sterility". Other people (like me) look at all that, and think, "OMG - they're really having trouble keeping infections out of here!". It seems to depend on whether people focus on the steps being taken to keep things clean...or on why so many steps need to be taken. To me, those signs don't say "this is a sterile environment" - they say "we really want this to be a sterile environment, but [i]we know it's not". Ouch.

Scary, isn't it??

[~LadyBug~]

Originally Posted by Juvysen

Scary, isn't it??

Yeah. I am glad I am not only one who thinks that way. Every time I go inside a hospital it just give me the creeps....yuck!

[Juvysen]

Originally Posted by ~LadyBug~

Yeah. I am glad I am not only one who thinks that way. Every time I go inside a hospital it just give me the creeps....yuck!

ER waiting rooms especially skeeve me out. The germs are just... you know... completely uncontained. :

[paxye]

I noticed the sanitizing stations at the local hospital a while back... then on the news this week there was a report that my local hospital has an outbreak of C. Difficile and that 4 people have died in the last 2 months...

And people wonder why it would need to be a life or death situation in order for me to accept giving birth in a hospital... I would rather be safe, I'll stay home...

[Thursday Girl]

nak
i want to make a t-shirt with a medal on it that says homebirth.

i went to a baby shower once, while pregnant with my third. (my friends baby shower, her first, planned hospital birth with epi) I did not say anything about my birth choices at all b/c i knew her choices were different then mine. Someone asked me where i was having the baby so i said i was having the baby at home, but tried to steer the conversation away from that. they kept pushing the whole "oh no drugs?" etc. then some other people asserted that i was crazy and that pregnant girl should just go for the drugs, etc. I just remember feeling so horrible. When i got home i told my husband how it wasn't fair that I would never say anything to someones face about their choices, and that i didn't bring it up on purpose, yet i was degraded for my choics, and that is considered okay to do. Of course if I had said something it would have been rude. (unfortunately our other friend was over who's girlfriend had had an epi, and then he just made me feel worse. I wish i would have just told him "you know what I was laughing during my labor too, and I didn't have any drugs."

one more rant, just to get it off my chest...had a friend brag about his wife and how well she did having there baby. the epi fell out as she started pushing, "so you know it was like she gave birth nauturally!" urrggh, i was kind of mad that my husband didn't defend me, but that really might have been a little rude.

i loved your rant, and in a way i sort of want to change the tshirt idea tosomething along the lines of
"I didn't give birth naturally for the cool medal, i gave birth naturally for my child"

[Youngfrankenstein]

Originally Posted by Thursday Girl

I just remember feeling so horrible. When i got home i told my husband how it wasn't fair that I would never say anything to someones face about their choices, and that i didn't bring it up on purpose, yet i was degraded for my choics, and that is considered okay to do.

That's the sad truth. I don't think hb is for everyone and we all make different choices but somehow mine are not "normal".

[seaheroine]

Originally Posted by Hezzie

Well, there's custom medal places online that would probably make one for you if you really wanted one. I think it would be funny to carry one in your pocket so when someone says the old "you don't get a medal for that," you can whip it out and say, "Yes, you do!" Since I'm not that keen on paying for a medal, I'll be content with this one that I did online for fun: home birth medal.

[Neldavi]

When people tell me I'm brave I tell them they're brave for going to the hospital.

[ABell]

Amen!

I completely understand what you mean. My entire family is of the mind that you are only necessary at the end of pregnancy/labor to push the baby out. When i was prego with my third child and was planning on having a homebirth(didn't get to have one b/c my water broke 6 weeks early and then my labor would progress), we told everybody and got 99% ridicule. The only person( and i do not exaggerate on this) that was happy and supportive of the homebirth was my LAWYER! Everybody else thought that me having my second child naturally was pushing the limits, but this was in the realms of lunacy. This just goes to show that all those women that were giving birth on their own not that many years ago are all just doing it to get medals huh? crazy women

[Fugitive]

Many are happy for me, others think I'm nuts. Well, I am but that's another story...

I don't mind defending my choice because
1. I have a good, sound, researched defense
2. I want to educate the many un or mis educated folks out there
3. I want other women to know that they DO have a choice to have a better birth!!

BUT!! I am maddened & sometimes a little hurt when I am accused of not caring about the health & safety of my baby!! It makes me want to shake the crap out of those women (they're all women!!)

Lastly...
How many book are out there that are full of incredible, positive, spiritually transformative Pitocin/Epi/Hospital births??

Uh...NONE!!

[amandabarugh]

Originally Posted by Fugitive

Many are happy for me, others think I'm nuts. Well, I am but that's another story...

I don't mind defending my choice because
1. I have a good, sound, researched defense
2. I want to educate the many un or mis educated folks out there
3. I want other women to know that they DO have a choice to have a better birth!!

BUT!! I am maddened & sometimes a little hurt when I am accused of not caring about the health & safety of my baby!! It makes me want to shake the crap out of those women (they're all women!!)

Lastly...
How many book are out there that are full of incredible, positive, spiritually transformative Pitocin/Epi/Hospital births??

Uh...NONE!!

Wanted to comment on the bolded because that was the first thing my dad asked me when he found out. "You worry so much about certain vaccines and them hurting the kids, but you're willing to put your newborn at risk by not being at the hospital?" It really caught me off-guard. It took a second for me to formulate an answer because in my mind, the two do not go together, at all. I just simply told him that we were of the opinion that birth is inherently safe, normal, and natural, and that while things can go wrong at home, they can also go wrong at the hospital. I went on to tell him the statistics I could remember off the top of my head. It didn't necessarily change his mind, but he dropped it.

[Fugitive]

It is a crazy thing, isn't it? Safety OF the hospital vs. safety FROM the hospital.

There is a great divide in our country about the relationship between childbirth & medicine. I also think that possibly along with the increase in medical interventions there has been a gradual disconnect of women from the knowledge & ownership of childbirth. The more autonomy that is taken away the less a women (thinks she) needs to know about birthing - the OB takes care of that stuff, I just lie here & do as I'm told. The alternative? Pain! Extreme PAIN!

May women think that the only person who can help them do this OR (more accurately) do this for them is the Dr because the Dr has the drugs. They'll tell you, "before modern medicine, women died in child birth!" Well sure, & they still do! Back then women & babies died from complications without medical support available, today women & babies have complications because of medical interventions.

With my 1st child I don't remember my OB asking me about my birth plan or how I planned on managing labor. I was simply told to "come in when contractions are 5 minutes apart". The "childbirth" class, that was more like a "things about baby" class, didn't educate us on the stages of labor, or the difference between Bradley & Lamaze, or that fear & apprehension can stall labor & that affection from you partner & a nice walk or some yoga can start it up again. We were told that our particular hospital, being in an urban area, we were likely to experience mothers without prenatal care screaming their heads off as we entered L&D - "don't let that bother you." Meconium can poison the baby so that's why they like to induce before you are "over-due". So many dumb things. Nothing useful.

[jengacnm]

Haven't read all of these, so maybe someone already said this:

"Do I get a medal if I DO get an epidural??"