Penis pain in 3.5 y/o, HELP!

[annep]

My son keeps complaining that his penis hurts. He told me this about 6 months ago and I rushed him to the ped who said he is just separating and it's totally normal and should get better in a few days.
Well, a few weeks ago it started up again and I just blew it off thinking he is separating like the dr said. He complains almlost every day and I've been starting to worry a little. Today he asked me to call the doctor because his penis hurts.
I asked him to show me and I touched it with one finger very gently and he jumped and said I hurt him.
I did call but I have to wait until Friday. I'm a little worried now.
He's not red or swollen, nothing visible. He is starting to separate, I've seen what looks like lint in his pee and he balloons up when he pees.
What could be going on here. Someone please give me all the could-bes.

Thanks,
Anne

[tutucrazy]

Originally Posted by annep

My son keeps complaining that his penis hurts. He told me this about 6 months ago and I rushed him to the ped who said he is just separating and it's totally normal and should get better in a few days.
Well, a few weeks ago it started up again and I just blew it off thinking he is separating like the dr said. He complains almlost every day and I've been starting to worry a little. Today he asked me to call the doctor because his penis hurts.
I asked him to show me and I touched it with one finger very gently and he jumped and said I hurt him.
I did call but I have to wait until Friday. I'm a little worried now.
He's not red or swollen, nothing visible. He is starting to separate, I've seen what looks like lint in his pee and he balloons up when he pees.
What could be going on here. Someone please give me all the could-bes.

Thanks,
Anne

As the foreskin separates new areas that were once attached separate and the urine stings those sore areas. This is normal and separation symptoms like this come and go throughout childhood. Nothing to worry about. Your son probably just separated in a new area and it will take some time for the glans to smooth over and the discomfort to go away. I would just give him a nice soak in the warm bath. A trip to the pedi is not necessary. Here are some threads for you:

Details about Development of Intact Boy:
http://www.mothering.com/discussions...893&highlight=

SPECIAL INFORMATION ABOUT THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE INTACT BOY:

During childhood/adolescence your son will go through a normal separation process as the foreskin separates from the glans. As I said before, the foreskin is fused during childhood to protect the developing penis from feces and other pathogens. Separation is different for each boy and happens at a different age for each boy. During this time he might experience some irritation, itching, stinging, minor redness, minor swelling, ballooning, spraying, smegma pearls, uneven retraction, etc. These are all totally NORMAL and resolve by themselves. I get get many concerned parents come here asking about their son's irritated, red, or slightly inflamed penis. 97% of the time it is just normal separation occurring. Some boys don't experience any of this but most boys have 1 of these symptoms at some point especially around ages 2-5 when boys really begin to explore their genitals with their hands. During self-discovery is a prime time for separation trauma to appear. UNLESS it gets increasingly worse, extremely inflamed, he has fever, or you suspect yeast infection there is nothing to worry about. (Bacterial infections are VERY RARE and usually only occur only after forcible retraction or a wound to the penis.) Usually the symptoms of normal separation resolve themselves within 48-72 hours. Due to the fact that US doctors know very little about the development of the intact boy, it is wise to wait it out and let this resolve on its own. Since boys tend to be more "hands on" with their genitals and their genitals are not as internal these symptoms appear more frequently than with girls. You may want to remind your son to be gentle with his privates as he begins to self-explore.

Pain/sting:
http://www.mothering.com/discussions...ting+urination

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

Because seperation happens over time in most boys and not all at once they can have pain off and on for years. If it where an infection there would be swelling and redness and discharge.

Here is a helpful link http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=764732

I personally wouldnt take him to the dr unless he showed definate signs of infection or if I wanted a swab done. I wouldnt let the Dr touch his penis at all.

[annep]

Thank you so much for easing my mind.

The doc wont hurt DS, I'm confident of that. Last time he checked him out, he only looked, never touched. That office is definitely foreskin friendly.
It took a long time to find such a good practice.

[tutucrazy]

Originally Posted by annep

Thank you so much for easing my mind.

The doc wont hurt DS, I'm confident of that. Last time he checked him out, he only looked, never touched. That office is definitely foreskin friendly.
It took a long time to find such a good practice.

Just be sure you remind the doc "no manipulation". That is great that you have a foreskin friendly doctor. You should add him/her to our foreskin friendly pedi list. I'm impressed that the doctor understands the process of separation.

Really it is just a matter of time and the pain will go away. There is nothing you or any doc can do but try to ease the symptoms at this point. Warm bath withe a couple tablespoons of baking soda tends to help. My son also balloons and has discomfort from time to time. Try to look at this as more of a growing pain and part of being a boy than a medical issue. It will go away and possibly reappear during childhood. Your son's age is a prime time for this b/c they tend to self-explore and be a little rough on their penis. You should keep your son in jeans or something that inhibits him from playing with himself for the time being. Sometimes little ones aggravate the symptoms of separation much like when kids pick a scab or poke a bruise. This will only extend the time of the discomfort so remind him not to touch down there for now until it feels better.

Remember that the symptoms of separation are not foreskin problems, they are merely a sign that the foreskin is developing normally.

[annep]

Originally Posted by tutucrazy

I'm impressed that the doctor understands the process of separation.

He's an amazing doc. Both of them in the practice are actually. Surprisingly AP/natural parenting supportive, but also extremely knowledgeable in the medical world.

[annep]

Okay, where's the foreskin friendly peds list? I can't find it.

[PuppyFluffer]

It is located in the sticky thread at the top of the forum. It's called Web resources, parenting questions.....

Here's a link to the specific thread you are asking about: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...5#post13479385