I think we are at our end

[Heavenly]

with our cat Toby. We have had him for 10 years and the idea of giving him away is heartbreaking, especially to our children. But he just will not stop pooping and peeing all over the floor. We have tried all the tips, I have done tons of research. He has two litter boxes (and we only live in 800 sq ft so that's a lot) and he will not go in either. He just poops and pees on the floor right beside them. We have tried everything we can think of and it doesn't change. Our entire apartment reeks of cat urine, even though we keep washing the carpets. We are buying a new home next June and we cannot take a cat who pees and poos all over the place. We really love him and the idea of giving him away hurts but we don't know what else to do. My in-laws said they will take him so we will still see him a lot but he won't be our cat anymore, you know? He doesn't do the pooping and peeing thing when he's with them. My MIL and I both agree that it is probably the children stressing him out. They are all really loud, but two of them are prone to major tantrums and stomping and screaming and slamming of doors. I think he is just getting old and cannot handle the stress of it anymore. DH jokingly said we could get rid of the kids and keep the cat but obviously that's not an option. Does anyone have any tips to help the children with this forthcoming loss of their pet?

[phatchristy]

How old are the kids?

[Heavenly]

They are 8, 6 and 3. The 8 year old has bipolar disorder and anxiety disorder (hence the tantrums) and the 3 year old has issues as well. There has been a lot of stress involving the children in the house and I think Toby is just stressed by it all.

[SevenVeils]

Isn't he still going to be living in the same house with you?

[Heavenly]

Yes, but he wouldn't be down in the area we are in or the area we share so essentially, to the children, he would be gone. Also we are moving out in less than a year.

[Catubodua]

has he been treated at a vets? usually when a cat is peeing outside the litterbox the first thing the vet checks for is a UI or crystals - both of which are easily treated.

[Heavenly]

Originally Posted by Catubodua

has he been treated at a vets? usually when a cat is peeing outside the litterbox the first thing the vet checks for is a UI or crystals - both of which are easily treated.

But would that cause pooping outside the box as well? He isn't doing anything in the box. Money is really tight - I need to find out how much a vet visit would cost.

[Irishmommy]

Originally Posted by Heavenly

Yes, but he wouldn't be down in the area we are in or the area we share so essentially, to the children, he would be gone. Also we are moving out in less than a year.

But wouldn't that make it an easier transition for the kids? You're just moving the cat upstairs for now, you could deal with moving next year, nearer the time.

[phatchristy]

Originally Posted by Heavenly

But would that cause pooping outside the box as well? He isn't doing anything in the box. Money is really tight - I need to find out how much a vet visit would cost.

Yes, it can. Because there can be considerable pain/discomfort caused by FUS, and urinating cats can start to associate that pain with the litter box and choose elsewhere.

Generally the first thing you do is to get the urine checked before you assume behavioral.

[phatchristy]

As you said, if he's still going to be living with the inlaws (but in the same house) I'd tell them that he's going to live w/grandma/grandpa. Just get them used to that idea. They can still see him up there, right?