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I'm Scared. - Page 3

post #41 of 45
I think when we fear rupture in a lot of ways we are able to be so focused because we have named our fear. There are other risks in pregnancy that are, statistically speaking, just as (un)likely to happen as a catastrophic rupture (or more likely) but we focus on rupture because that has been handed to us as what we should fear. Do thoughts of cord prolapse or any of the other dangers of labor and birth keep you up at night? Or do you hear "rupture, rupture, rupture" and let this become your reality?

If doctors told you to fear infection from cesarean or breathing problems in your baby from cesarean...if they made you sign a consent form that said you knew that if you had a cesarean your baby was more likely to spend time in a NICU, what would the focus of your fears be?

All of this is compounded in that you've had the ability to believe in yourself and your body taken away as well. Instead of nurturing you and helping you come back strong and confident, we have a system that uses the dent in your confidence to further fuel your fears. It's okay to be scared, but you can let your fears own you or you can own your fears. It's a fine line between listening to yourself and listening to all those seeds of doubt.
post #42 of 45
Thread Starter 
Thanks ladies!!!! Your support is helping me SOOOO much! It is amazing what typed words can do
post #43 of 45
SLP mama, if you do the netflix 2-week free trial you can watch Business of Being Born "instantly" (online) as part of the trial.

Or, it appears that for $6.99 you can do a 24-hour online rental directly from the movie's website. Seems like a good deal, haven't tried it myself (I've already seen it 4 times!)

https://www.thebusinessofbeingborn.com/store_stream.php

Highly recommend having DH watch it...it made a huge difference for my DH, turned him from mildly tolerant of my wacky birth ideas to actively advocating them.
post #44 of 45
Quote:
Originally Posted by meganmarie View Post
SLP mama, if you do the netflix 2-week free trial you can watch Business of Being Born "instantly" (online) as part of the trial.

Or, it appears that for $6.99 you can do a 24-hour online rental directly from the movie's website. Seems like a good deal, haven't tried it myself (I've already seen it 4 times!)

https://www.thebusinessofbeingborn.com/store_stream.php

Highly recommend having DH watch it...it made a huge difference for my DH, turned him from mildly tolerant of my wacky birth ideas to actively advocating them.
My husband and I watched that last week. Like your husband, he got a lot out of it! He even said he would love for me to have a home birth one day! We will have this one at the hospital (planned VBAC) so I am praying it goes well. A couple of days later, he asked me, if I got an epidural, would I still release the oxytocin to bond with the baby. So I can tell he has been thinking more about it.

SLPMama: I have the same fears as you. The more days that go by, the less worries I have, which says a lot. Just have the confidence in yourself that you can give it your best shot. There is no such thing as failure if you have done your best!

P.S. I had the meconium, too. Pitocin (WHY????), doc broke water, internal monitor b/c of the heart rate drops, etc. I only got to 4 cm. That's what makes me so mad. They didn't even try to get the baby happy before deciding on the section. I had only been in the L&D room for about an hour or so. Of course, baby ended up in the NICU for 10 days with breathing problems and developed an infection. I developed a staph infection 3 months later.
post #45 of 45
Quote:
Originally Posted by lisa_nc View Post
I think when we fear rupture in a lot of ways we are able to be so focused because we have named our fear. There are other risks in pregnancy that are, statistically speaking, just as (un)likely to happen as a catastrophic rupture (or more likely) but we focus on rupture because that has been handed to us as what we should fear. Do thoughts of cord prolapse or any of the other dangers of labor and birth keep you up at night? Or do you hear "rupture, rupture, rupture" and let this become your reality?

If doctors told you to fear infection from cesarean or breathing problems in your baby from cesarean...if they made you sign a consent form that said you knew that if you had a cesarean your baby was more likely to spend time in a NICU, what would the focus of your fears be?

All of this is compounded in that you've had the ability to believe in yourself and your body taken away as well. Instead of nurturing you and helping you come back strong and confident, we have a system that uses the dent in your confidence to further fuel your fears. It's okay to be scared, but you can let your fears own you or you can own your fears. It's a fine line between listening to yourself and listening to all those seeds of doubt.
Hi! I noticed you are 32 weeks, too. What is your due date, and what are you having?
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