So, dd1 (4.5) is really a great kid, we rarely have behavior problems, she is usually reasonable and willing to work things out. HOWEVER, lately (maybe age or maybe some new older friends she's been hanging out with) she has been being oppositional in pretty defiant ways. One example is tonight, her and E (1.5) were running through the living room and sliding across the ottoman. That is cool with me, we are pretty lax about things like that. After a time, they were coming in from opposite directions, and I was worried that they were going to crash head first into each other, so I said "Abby, take turns with Ella, make sure she is out of the way before you go. I'm worried you will both bonk heads." A second later, I see them both rearing up to go, from opposite corners, so (knowing that E, at 1.5 would not be able to stop herself) I said to Abby, "Abby, Ella is going to go first. Wait until Ella goes, then take a turn." And she looked at me and went anyway.
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SO then I told her to sit with me on the couch for a bit since she was being unsafe and not listening to me. I told her I didn't want her to slide across the ottoman anymore, because I was worried about their safety. She gets up and kind of shuffles her way to the corner of the room, and I could see she was going to go for it. I again told her not to slide anymore since she showed me she was not able to take turns and do it safely. And she said, "I can do it anyway" ANd I said "No, do not do it, come sit down" And she DID IT. AND gave me a "HA! So there!" look!!! I was furious! I sent her to her room (Not what we normally do at all, but I was very angry) and went in to talk to her a few minutes later.
She was upset of course, but honestly, she knows there is really no consequence...so now what? I am not UP or CL, I believe in natural or logical consequences, and honestly we have not had to do much more than talk with this kid...but now the purposeful defiance and disrespect is creeping in and I can't stand it.
WHat could I have done in this situation? Removing the ottoman is not an option, 1. because its BIG and we don't have another place for it and 2. because we use it and if would affect the whole family to not have it and 3 because, really, at 4.5, she should be able to follow a simple verbal instruction.
:SO then I told her to sit with me on the couch for a bit since she was being unsafe and not listening to me. I told her I didn't want her to slide across the ottoman anymore, because I was worried about their safety. She gets up and kind of shuffles her way to the corner of the room, and I could see she was going to go for it. I again told her not to slide anymore since she showed me she was not able to take turns and do it safely. And she said, "I can do it anyway" ANd I said "No, do not do it, come sit down" And she DID IT. AND gave me a "HA! So there!" look!!! I was furious! I sent her to her room (Not what we normally do at all, but I was very angry) and went in to talk to her a few minutes later.
She was upset of course, but honestly, she knows there is really no consequence...so now what? I am not UP or CL, I believe in natural or logical consequences, and honestly we have not had to do much more than talk with this kid...but now the purposeful defiance and disrespect is creeping in and I can't stand it.
WHat could I have done in this situation? Removing the ottoman is not an option, 1. because its BIG and we don't have another place for it and 2. because we use it and if would affect the whole family to not have it and 3 because, really, at 4.5, she should be able to follow a simple verbal instruction.
