question for parents of kids in PS with "issues"

[vtgirl]

not quite sure how to word that title - sorry! what i am wondering after reading the thread about school supplies, is, if your PS'Dchild has an "isssue" eg. autism, ADD, allergies, mine has type 1 diabetes, whatever it may be - do you run into problems with teachers, nurses, admin , whoever?

if so, what kinds of problems? i got the impression from several posts in that other thread of "well, since we already "make waves" with our special needs, we try to fly under the radar so we don't bug them even more."

is this your experience?

i ask because my dd is going into 3rd grade at a new school since hers closed this june and when i brought her there for a "step-up" day, i did NOT get a warm fuzzy vibe from the people who will be helping her manage her diabetes. i took her back for a little day camp they ran for 4 weeks and removed her after 2 days because i did not feel she was being listened to.

i first thought i was just being judgemental since we are coming from a 2 room schoolhouse where she was treated like a family member by all the adults. i couldn't have asked for better care for her. i was expecting the same at this new school (which has 120 kids K-6 vs 22 kids K-4) because it is her right for one thing and also they are getting like $11,000 in tuition from us so shouldn't they feel like bending over backwards to accomodate us so we won't bring our tuition $$ elsewhere.

sorry, i know that sounds bitchy. i am worried that in larger schools this might be more of a trend - can you reassure me and maybe give me some tips on how NOT to alienate her potential caregivers........thanks!

[lightheart]

So far we really haven't run into problems, last year our little guy was in the special needs preschool class so every child in there had extra stuff going on and I really felt like the teachers had BTDT with everything that I threw them if that makes any sense.

This year, tommorrow!, he'll start Kindy and be in the regular classroom (and at a different school, same disctric though) we'll see how things go.

Some advise I would give is to know your rights, know your child's rights. If it's an IEP, if it's a 504 plan... You can call the shots! But try to work with the school and teachers first before you really start pushing the things. Not saying you shouldn't get things in writing, but many times just talking, discussing things will do the trick. If that desn't work then you can force the issues to the law. Remember they are not going to teach you tell you what the law really and truly says for everything, if it's something they want, then yeah they are going to be pointing them out, but beware, they may not tell you ALL the things that they could be doing, so you have to do your own homework.

I guess I do feel like I am the bothersome parent sometime, I do feel like I take some of the teacher's/school's time to 'talk' about what is going on with our son... Don't let him get his hearing aids wet, this is what you should do if they do get wet, don't feed him anything but what I send in his lunch or for his snack, do this, don't do this, blah blah blah... so compared to the "big" things asking about little things, ... that really if you do step back from the whole picture really aren't little... may sound like micromanegemnt.

I don't know... let me get through this week and I'll get back to you!

[karne]

With my children's school I expect a lot, but I also give alot. For me, that means knowing what works or doesn't work for my kids, but also being open to the suggestions or plans that the teachers have nd respecting that home and school can look very different. I give a substantial amount of time volunteering, so I do have a good idea of what the real life of the school day looks like.

With a medical condition like diabetes, I think I'd feel pretty comfortable being the squeaky wheel. Do you have a 504 plan? That might take your concerns to the realm of being written down and a firm plan made. I'm guessing that the management of your child's diabetes has a direct effect on the school experience, so ongoing and open communication seems completely necessary.

You might try posting over in the Special Needs forum as well.

ETA: I re-read your post and wondered if your dd was having medical concerns that weren't being listened to by the school staff? Is there a school nurse you can work with?

[eepster]

None of DS's issues are in the realm of major medical concern, but he has a bunch of minor things. He used special soap b/c the regular stuff triggers his eczema, we are vegetarians, he is very shy and sensitive and needed me to stay at the school till he felt comfortable, he carries around a stuffed bunny when he gets anxious. The school DS goes to has always been completely respectful of every single one of these issues and always listens to us.

His school is a pretty large, Montessori preschool/kindergarten. They also happen to be one of the less expensive ones in the area.

[Lollybrat]

My DS has Autism Spectrum Disorder and will be starting kindergarten in the fall. Our IEP team is wonderful and have been great with the transition from preschool (which was at a different elementary school in our district) to kindy. DS has a very indivudialized program. He will be in the Autism K-2 classroom with partial mainstreaming in the typical kindy class. We are very excited about this coming school year.

I do not feel like we "make waves" with our special needs and I need to tred lightly in other areas. Nor did I feel that way during the 2.5 years he was in public preschool. It is my job to advocate for my child and see that the school fulfills his educational needs. Sometimes it takes a lot of patience to do this diplomatically, but I've always found the school personnel willing to understand and help.

It sounds like your child needs a 504 plan to make sure that her medical needs are taken care of appropriately. I agree with the PP that you might want to post in the SN forum to get more info about this.

[vtgirl]

thank you for sharing your experiences - it is helpful to hear from others who have BTDT.

i will look around in the SN forum to see what i can find there.

i was told by a friend that i should not go in demanding a 504 plan right away, but that i should first try to see if we can manage without one, then if things are not going well we would proceed from there.

is it costly to the school to have one implemented? i really need to google this and get more info - off to do that as soon as i finish typing here!

thanks again!