Overwhelmed

[guestmama9916]

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[BlessedMommy2006]

It's really not that difficult. Just three things to remember:

1) Never retract the foreskin.

2) Never allow anyone else to do so.

3) Just clean it like you would any other body part.

Infections are rare, unless there has been forced retraction. My son is young (just shy of 5 months) but so far no problems or issues. I just make sure to watch him like a hawk when he goes to the doctor, and I talked to my doc about not retracting.

If anything he is easier to care for than my daughter was--less places for poop to get into!

Likely the only problem that your intact son will run into during life is other people thinking that he has a problem.

Shop around and make sure to find a great doctor who understands that intact penises don't need meddling with and you'll be just fine!

[MyBoysBlue]

I've got two sons 7 and 2.5. Because I have followed the instructions of leaving it alone I've never had a problem with either.

[lawmama1984]

My 14 month old has had zero problems.

Also, I think you will find caring for an intact penis a lot easier than caring for a circ'd one for which you had to apply vaseline, gauze, may have had to deal with adhesions, etc. Like PP said, you just wipe the outside like a finger and never ever retract and you are good to go. HTH!

[LavenderMae]

It's really quite simple. Wipe like you would a finger, don't retract (and don't let anyone else). I think you will be pleasantly surprised at what a non-issue it will be.

[earthmama369]

DS is 3. We've had zero problems with his being intact. His penis became fully retractable on his own a few months ago and he didn't express any pain during the process. I didn't even realize it was retractable until he pulled his foreskin back in the bathtub one day. No infections, no spraying, maybe a little ballooning? About half a second before the pee comes out, you can see his foreskin balloon a little. I don't see why that would be a problem? When he was a baby, that was a great warning when I was in the middle of changing his diaper so I could grab a cloth and cover him up. I'm not sure if spraying is related to the foreskin or just something some boys do. The only little boy I know who sprays all over the toilet area is my nephew, and he's circumcised. His dad's a mess in the bathroom, too, so I suspect it's more lack of modeling good hygiene habits and how to aim. DH is intact and he and ds are both very neat in the bathroom -- no drips, no unexpected surprises on the seat. They even put the lid down when they're done!

[LavenderMae]

I wanted to add that if we had a culture of cutting girls there would need to be a similar sticky for the issues that girls might have. But for the most part the issues that can arise in girls are known and most medical personnel would know how treat said issues with out suggesting circumcision or retracting. In reality it is the same for boys except we live in a culture that has a history of cutting boys so the knowledge we should have about the natural penis has been lost.

[dinahx]

It is very easy! The one problem we have had is a forcible retraction at a Children's hospital. And my biggest problem is finding the time to write the letter saying how outraged I am. Since you know this is a potential danger, you will be ahead of the game. It is a breeze!

[MyBoysBlue]

There is an old now closed thread called Intact and no problems

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...ct+no+problems

You might get some reassurance there.

[beru]

Originally Posted by Hopeful Mama

It seems there are alot of problems/issues that (as the sticky puts it) may or may not happen or things I may or may not see. For those of you that have uncirc'd boys, has it been alot of trouble? How regularly do you encounter the infections, the pain, the spraying, the ballooning, etc, etc? I

I have a 5 year old intact boy and a 2 year old girl. I have had no problems with either of their genitals except for diaper rash.

Problems/issues that may or may not happen with circumcised penis:
Immediate, common complications of circumcision surgery like infection
Rare but serious complications of circ like injury to glans, sepsis, death, etc.
Pain during urination for several days after circumcision
Care of the circumcision wound
Repeated separation of adhesions following circumcision
"Need" for revision surgery
Yeast infections and diaper rash on the glans
Possible long-term complications of circ including meatal stenosis, bent penis, pubic hair on shaft, and desensitivity leading to sexual problems.
Yeast infections and diaper rash on the glans
UTIs (equally rare in ALL boys)
Teaching boys good hygeine

Problems/issues that may or may not happen with girls' genitals:
Yeast infections and diaper rash on the vulva.
Vaginal infections
UTIs
Labial adhesions
Teaching girls good hygiene re: smegma and menstruation
Teaching girls how to use tampons/pads
Teaching girls how to cope with pain and other symptoms of menstruation
Pain from having the hymen broken (which can happen before sex due to strain or injury)


Intact boys do not have more "problems/issues", they just have unfamiliar "problems/issues".

The simplest hygiene advice is the same for all of them, intact or circumcized, boy or girl. Don't be agressive. Leave their genitals alone and don't use harsh soaps. (I don't use soap at all on either of my kids around the areas where it would contact mucous membrane-entrance to the vagina/foreskin.)

[Yulia_R]

Originally Posted by BlessedMommy2006

It's really not that difficult. Just three things to remember:

1) Never retract the foreskin.

2) Never allow anyone else to do so.

:


I have both: a boy and a girl (both are intact) and I must say that it is SO much easier to care for intact boy's privet parts than it is for girl's one. Really, you don't need to do ANYTHING with boy's penis! Just wipe it as a finger if you have a poopy diaper and other than that you do NOT even need to wash it with soap (get him out of a bath tub or shower, dry him up and done deal, intact penis requires no additional soaping/cleaning...peice of cake!)

[Anastasiya]

Originally Posted by Hopeful Mama

We're having a boy this Nov or Dec. I had previously decided last pregnancy that if I had a boy, we would not circ. I know all the reasons why I don't want to do it. But I just read through one of the links in the sticky about caring for an uncirc'd boy and TBH, I feel a bit overwhelmed now. It seems there are alot of problems/issues that (as the sticky puts it) may or may not happen or things I may or may not see. For those of you that have uncirc'd boys, has it been alot of trouble? How regularly do you encounter the infections, the pain, the spraying, the ballooning, etc, etc? I have a circ'd son (before I educated myself) and he hasn't had a single issue. Its not even something I have to worry about or think about when it comes to his care so I'm a bit overwhelmed with the things that might or might not happen to an uncirc'd boy. What has it been like IRL for those of you reading this? TIA

I agree with the previous poster in that it SEEMS so complicated because we no longer have the knowledge of the intact penis and what is NORMAL penile development.

I have three intact boys, by the way, and not one has had an issue. I have friends with a total of 10+ intact boys and again, no problems.

In order to understand why there are the potential "problems", you have to know what causes them. You mentioned infection, for one.

An infection with an intact boy is usually caused by someone retracting the foreskin and introducing that infection, or it is caused by yeast.

WHY INFECTION? Because the foreskin is fused to the head of the penis at birth. So retracting it means that you have to literally rip the skin off the head of the penis - that creates bleeding and open wounds, and therefore can introduce infection.

WHY YEAST? Because the inner foreskin is a mucuous membrane, just like the inside of your girlie bits, and too much sugar and soaps can cause a bacterial imbalance. In that case, the remedy for the boy is the same for the girl (monistat, etc). We've never had any infections or yeast infections. I don't let them take bubble baths nor do I let my daughter in anything other than California Baby, for instance.

WHY PAIN? Because the penis at birth hasn't finished its development. The foreskin, like I said, is still fused to the head of the penis to protect it, and as the child matures, that fusion starts to break away. This can sometimes happen too fast and cause a few raw areas that might hurt upon urination. It's all a part of a boy's growing up.

WHY SPRAYING? As the foreskin loosens, and as the urine stream gets stronger, sometimes it's just harder for a little boy to aim in a nice, clean line. Nothing to be concerned about.

WHY BALLOONING? Because, once again, as the foreskin loosens from the glans, little pockets are created inside where it's loose in one place but still tightly fused in another. So when urinating, the pee gets forced into these little pockets and looks like it's puffing up the end of the foreskin. Not a concern - all the urine comes out.

This is all part of normal and healthy development. Nothing at all to worry about.

People from non circumcising cultures say often that there are just no issues surrounding having a foreskin. Then again, they understand what it is, how it functions, etc.... we're just a bit behind.

[Yulia_R]

Originally Posted by Sancta

I agree with the previous poster in that it SEEMS so complicated because we no longer have the knowledge of the intact penis and what is NORMAL penile development.

I have three intact boys, by the way, and not one has had an issue. I have friends with a total of 10+ intact boys and again, no problems.

In order to understand why there are the potential "problems", you have to know what causes them. You mentioned infection, for one.

An infection with an intact boy is usually caused by someone retracting the foreskin and introducing that infection, or it is caused by yeast.

WHY INFECTION? Because the foreskin is fused to the head of the penis at birth. So retracting it means that you have to literally rip the skin off the head of the penis - that creates bleeding and open wounds, and therefore can introduce infection.

WHY YEAST? Because the inner foreskin is a mucuous membrane, just like the inside of your girlie bits, and too much sugar and soaps can cause a bacterial imbalance. In that case, the remedy for the boy is the same for the girl (monistat, etc). We've never had any infections or yeast infections. I don't let them take bubble baths nor do I let my daughter in anything other than California Baby, for instance.

WHY PAIN? Because the penis at birth hasn't finished its development. The foreskin, like I said, is still fused to the head of the penis to protect it, and as the child matures, that fusion starts to break away. This can sometimes happen too fast and cause a few raw areas that might hurt upon urination. It's all a part of a boy's growing up.

WHY SPRAYING? As the foreskin loosens, and as the urine stream gets stronger, sometimes it's just harder for a little boy to aim in a nice, clean line. Nothing to be concerned about.

WHY BALLOONING? Because, once again, as the foreskin loosens from the glans, little pockets are created inside where it's loose in one place but still tightly fused in another. So when urinating, the pee gets forced into these little pockets and looks like it's puffing up the end of the foreskin. Not a concern - all the urine comes out.

This is all part of normal and healthy development. Nothing at all to worry about.

People from non circumcising cultures say often that there are just no issues surrounding having a foreskin. Then again, they understand what it is, how it functions, etc.... we're just a bit behind.

Excellent answer! : to all of the above!

[catholic74]

My son is 2 and I have never had any issues at all and there is nothing special at all that I do to care for his intact penis. He gets regular baths with mild soap and that's it. I don't even actaully wash his penis. It just gets washed naturally as he's playing in the tub. It is important to be aware of potential issues, just as with any baby, but it's rare any of them will ever come up. I would be more afraid to allow someone to perform surgery on my newborn with all it's potential problems. Boy, the horror stories I've heard from the circumcision alone scares me! Best to leave nature alone! Besides, remember that your son has a right to all his parts!

[SunShineSally]

My Ds was Circed with out my consent and he has had many many issues. My STBDH is Circed and he has issues also. We are keeping bean here intact. Even if I never planned to keep Ds intact after all the issues with what happened to him after his circ there would be no way I would allow any child of mine to be circed. The main this is that you need to be forceful at times to make sure no one retracts them and then you should be smooth sailing Congratulations on your new little bean and I never saw you over in the DDC we are due around the same time :

[guestmama9916]

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[homeschoolingmama]

I have 2 sons. No problems here.

[Fellow Traveler]

Hopeful Mom I just wanted to add a few thoughts. Some of the things you listed in your original post are normal things that could occur with an intact boy. Ballooning for instance can happen but isn't a problem at all. Some boys might experience some soreness as part of the process of separation. It can in some sense be thought of as a growing pain like teething. However, most boys go through that process and don't even know it.

You see a lot of questions or issues posted because people come here for help that's part of our purpose so it's not a surprise that it seems as you describe. In all likelihood your son will never have any of these issue because they are rare and you know ahead of time what to expect. Like me, and most other intact guys, he'll never have a problem.

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

The odds that your ds will have a problem is very low. The only reason you see so many issues posted here is because this is one of the known places on the net that you can get the right information when you need it.

If you think about it things would be a bit odd if every single post was about how problem free their intact ds has been. Why post if there isnt a problem is what I am trying to say.

The resources in the sticky's are there to help you know what to do "if" a problem comes up because not a lot of Dr. are very knowledgable about the intact penis and if you are 99% sure of what is going on when/if you have to take him in for treatment then you can prevent something happening, like retraction, that shouldnt happen. Knowledge is power the more you know the less likely your ds will have more damage done to him should something arise.

Many woman have yeast infections but no one is really concerned with it you treat it and move on that is the same thing for a boy even a circed boy can get yeast. Infections happen all over the body and having a foreskin means that it "can" become infected. The odds that it will if it is treated correctly ie leaving it alone are very very small.

I realize that your circed ds has had no problems that you can see and he may never have issues but he might very well have issues later on that you will never hear of unless you talk to him about his sex life. Just because you cant see a problem dosnt mean that one isnt there. Not being snarky there just giving you something to think about.

[calngavinsmom]

Hey Momma. Have you seen this article? It documents that in fact, circumcised boys are more prone to problems in the first three years of life than those left intact:
http://www.cirp.org/library/complications/vanhowe/

I have two intact little guys (7 &4) and they have had ZERO problems with their penis'. Ear infections, a granuloma on my youngest' face, stitches, sprains, illness ect., but no problems with their penis'.

Seeing potential problems summarized on a page would be overwhelming, but if you compare the lists and severity of circed vs intact potential problems, going with the intact choice will definitely lower your sons risk of developing problems at all

Good luck and take care!