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Would you let your son wear a dress/skirt? - Page 6

post #101 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by hipumpkins View Post
For those of you who say, "no" how do you explain it to the little kid?
I am asking b/c i just can not fathom myself saying, "No b/c those are only for girls"
I can't think of a scenario where I would have to say that to a girl. .
I wouldn't buy a child-sized 3-piece suit for my 2-3 yo girl. I'd say "that's for boys." I've thought about it a lot, and I just don't have an issue with some clothing being for boys and some being for girls. It just doesn't bother me.

When my dc is old enough to make a informed decision about cross-gender dressing, I will be supportive of that choice. My dd is 8, and I would consider her old enough to make that choice now.
post #102 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicianDad View Post
Should I not let my children go anywhere with their transgendered honourary "aunt" because someone might make a rude comment about dresses being for girls?
But your transgendered aunt id's as female, no? Or am I misunderstanding? Because then, arguably, she wears dresses because dresses are for girls (women).
post #103 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnmama View Post
But your transgendered aunt id's as female, no? Or am I misunderstanding? Because then, arguably, she wears dresses because dresses are for girls (women).
But physically she is male and those who don't know her see her as a man in a dress.
post #104 of 183
Sure, why not?
post #105 of 183
Yes!!! And in fact, I'd put my baby boy in a dress, too. Who cares? Give em some gender neutrality so they can find for themselves who they are.

Several of the boys at my daughter's preschool come to school in their sister's dresses and no one comments...it's pretty normal in my hippie town.
post #106 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicianDad View Post
But physically she is male and those who don't know her see her as a man in a dress.
But why does she choose a dress? Because it is for women, no?
post #107 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnmama View Post
I wouldn't buy a child-sized 3-piece suit for my 2-3 yo girl. I'd say "that's for boys." I've thought about it a lot, and I just don't have an issue with some clothing being for boys and some being for girls. It just doesn't bother me.

When my dc is old enough to make a informed decision about cross-gender dressing, I will be supportive of that choice. My dd is 8, and I would consider her old enough to make that choice now.
I think my 3yo dd would look adorable in a 3-piece suit! True, I probably wouldn't go out of my way to but it for her, but I do buy her some clothing from the boys' section--she loves dinosaur shirts, for instance, and you'd be hard pressed to find anything with dinosaurs in the girls' section. And the boys' styles are often simpler and often have more solid and bright colors (I HATE when the only girls' shirts have slogans like "Born to Shop" or "Diva").

Dh, by the way, wears lots of pink and lavender shirts and looks fantastic in those colors. Even his dad, who has extremely rigid notions of gender, rocks the pink polo shirt sometimes.
post #108 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYCVeg View Post
Even his dad, who has extremely rigid notions of gender, rocks the pink polo shirt sometimes.

I grew up in the 80s. Oddly enough, most of the really macho umm...UAVs...habitually wore pink polo shirts. The guys I knew who wouldn't be caught dead in pink were actually lesschauvinistic and macho, overall.
post #109 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicianDad View Post
If girls can wear pants and still be girls, then boys can wear dresses and still be boys.
This is the heart of the issue for me. If my son wanted to wear a dress, I'd let him. And if someone was gauche enough to say something about the impropriety of what my toddler is wearing, I'd have a few uncouth words of my own to share. What you put on your body does NOT make you who you are. I can put on DH's uniform, but that doesn't make me a Coastie.
post #110 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYCVeg View Post
I think my 3yo dd would look adorable in a 3-piece suit! True, I probably wouldn't go out of my way to but it for her, but I do buy her some clothing from the boys' section--she loves dinosaur shirts, for instance, and you'd be hard pressed to find anything with dinosaurs in the girls' section. And the boys' styles are often simpler and often have more solid and bright colors (I HATE when the only girls' shirts have slogans like "Born to Shop" or "Diva").

Dh, by the way, wears lots of pink and lavender shirts and looks fantastic in those colors. Even his dad, who has extremely rigid notions of gender, rocks the pink polo shirt sometimes.
My ds wears pink, as does my dh. I love pink on my dh. My dd wears stuff from the boy's section sometimes. A t-shirt is a t-shirt, and a sweatshirt is a sweatshirt.

I see dresses and suits differently, though. They are "formal girl" and "formal boy". I don't have a problem with that, or teaching my young child that reality in our culture. If, understanding that reality, my dc chooses to go against it, I would fully support it.
post #111 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by NYCVeg View Post
she loves dinosaur shirts, for instance, and you'd be hard pressed to find anything with dinosaurs in the girls' section.
What is it with that??? DS loves dinos and its easy to find something for him but I've NEVER seen anything for a girl. I can't believe no one in the clothing industry has thought "Gee, I wonder if girls like dinosaurs?"
post #112 of 183
Yes, I would. Neither of my boys have ever asked, though. Ds4.5 does have pink shoes and Hello Kitty sneakers-- and gets asked by almost every child who has seen them "Why are you wearing girl shoes?" :
post #113 of 183
No I wouldn't. But it is far more complicated, I would let, and do have my daughter dress in her brothers hand me downs. I don't and won't, let my daughter dress in pink and white frills, as I don't let my son dress in camaflage print. I think all this is a matter of taste, however if my son wanted to play dress up and happened to be the one in a dress I would let him, just as I let him push pink strollers around as a toddler, with pleasure.
post #114 of 183
I would let my kids wear whatever they are comfortable in, as long as it doesn't have rips or tears in it. (lol I have to throw some of their clothes away eventually or they would wear it till it crumbled off, much like my dh and his clothes. ) My boys have never really asked to wear skirts or dresses, but we watch princess movies together. I guess there hasn't been much of an opportunity to wear those things, since I am not much of a skirt wearer myself.

One of my 6 year old's male classmates wore a long skirt to school a couple of time in kindergarten and no one batted an eye.
post #115 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnmama View Post
But why does she choose a dress? Because it is for women, no?
No because she enjoys wearing a dress...

Just like babymomma wouldn't wear one to save her life. She's also a woman.

Many guys I went to school with work skirts, not kilt type skirts either. They were all males and just liked the freedom.

But when talking about rude comments others might make, what someone identifies with doesn't matter because society has a hard time looking past the equipment.
post #116 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunnmama View Post
My ds wears pink, as does my dh. I love pink on my dh. My dd wears stuff from the boy's section sometimes. A t-shirt is a t-shirt, and a sweatshirt is a sweatshirt.

I see dresses and suits differently, though. They are "formal girl" and "formal boy". I don't have a problem with that, or teaching my young child that reality in our culture. If, understanding that reality, my dc chooses to go against it, I would fully support it.
Not all dresses are formal. Some are fun dresses. I'm pretty sure what DD is wearing wouldn't be allowed at a formal gathering. It is a dress though.

(P.S. DD has worn a 3 piece suit before, and she was still 100% girl)
post #117 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by NicaG View Post
And yes, there's no equivalent for girls. There's no real way for a girl to dress up as a boy in our culture. Maybe getting a boy's haircut? I have a son and a daughter and I don't think there's anything wrong with saying there's a different rule here for boys and girls.
My issue is that it's not really that there are different rules for boys and girls, it's that there are rules for boys and no rules for girls when it comes to clothing. A girl can wear whatever she wants -- no parts of the clothing spectrum are off-limits to her. But a boy just isn't allowed to wear nearly 50% of the clothes that are out there. That just doesn't seem right, or fair.

Someone mentioned 3-piece suits as being a clothing item that's traditionally not worn by girls/women. Quite a few girls (including myself) posed in a suit and bow tie for our senior portraits in high school rather than the off-the-shoulder dress thing. And quite a few girls went to the prom in a suit instead of a dress. No one batted an eye, or questioned our sexuality, or described what we were doing as cross-dressing, or had any comment whatsoever on the matter apart from "You look so cute!".
post #118 of 183
True! This is a good and OT time to mention that I went to my prom with a girl. Good times, good times.
post #119 of 183
I didn't have a prom, but I went to my grad dinner with a boy and a 4 yo. Good times.
post #120 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicianDad View Post
Not all dresses are formal. Some are fun dresses. I'm pretty sure what DD is wearing wouldn't be allowed at a formal gathering. It is a dress though.

(P.S. DD has worn a 3 piece suit before, and she was still 100% girl)
I didn't mean formal as in formal-wear. I guess I meant formal as in making a statement. In our culture, toddler dresses (even casual dresses) say "girl". In our culture, toddler 3 piece suits say "boy". I just don't have an issue with that.
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