My daughter is 27 mo old and has been in this phase lately of objecting to EVERYTHING. I know that this is somewhat normal, but I would like to see if there are other ideas of how to handle this...
I am a SAHM mom and the only other person who has cared for her is her Dad, so she always has access to us and we are both very pro-attachment parenting. We don't let her cry alone, she is still nursing and I carry her quite a bit (not in a carrier as she won't have it). The trouble is that she objects to everything at full volume, and since I am carrying her so much, that means screaming in my ear, all day. I can handle it, for the most part, my most trying times are when I am tired and hungry, but I really just want to make sure that we aren't setting ourselves up for something really bad by not handling this a certain way. It has been wearing me down, her screaming at every suggestion or offer I make.
I talk with her all the time, and when she screams I ask her to talk to me in a way that I can understand because I want to meet her needs. I ask her questions to try and find what it is that she is wanting/needing, but with every suggestion I get "NO _____!!!", she isn't listening to me, she is just objecting to what I say. I ask her to say "No, thank you" in a calm voice instead of screaming as that is much nicer for me to hear, and sometimes she responds positively to this.
Today, it got to the point where I needed to just walk away, which of course, makes it so much worse as she just screams for me. How can I walk away from my child that is calling for me? 7 seconds later, I returned and asked her if she wanted me to pick her up and she said "Mama pick me up" and I just stood there holding her for about 10 minutes- if I say anything, she just screams, so I figure I'd just not give her anything to scream at me about for a few minutes...
I feel like there is so much more to this, it is hard to break it down into a short summary, but I hope I am making sense. My intuition says that I should just continue to talk with her when it is practical, and the other times, I should just shut my mouth, hold her and keep doing whatever it is that I was doing. My husband is starting to question my approach, so I thought I would ask you Mama's that have more experience and insight that I.
In all honesty, I am afraid that by accommodating her as much as we that we are creating a child who will be spoiled and ungrateful. Anyways, thanks for your time and suggestions!!!
I am a SAHM mom and the only other person who has cared for her is her Dad, so she always has access to us and we are both very pro-attachment parenting. We don't let her cry alone, she is still nursing and I carry her quite a bit (not in a carrier as she won't have it). The trouble is that she objects to everything at full volume, and since I am carrying her so much, that means screaming in my ear, all day. I can handle it, for the most part, my most trying times are when I am tired and hungry, but I really just want to make sure that we aren't setting ourselves up for something really bad by not handling this a certain way. It has been wearing me down, her screaming at every suggestion or offer I make.
I talk with her all the time, and when she screams I ask her to talk to me in a way that I can understand because I want to meet her needs. I ask her questions to try and find what it is that she is wanting/needing, but with every suggestion I get "NO _____!!!", she isn't listening to me, she is just objecting to what I say. I ask her to say "No, thank you" in a calm voice instead of screaming as that is much nicer for me to hear, and sometimes she responds positively to this.
Today, it got to the point where I needed to just walk away, which of course, makes it so much worse as she just screams for me. How can I walk away from my child that is calling for me? 7 seconds later, I returned and asked her if she wanted me to pick her up and she said "Mama pick me up" and I just stood there holding her for about 10 minutes- if I say anything, she just screams, so I figure I'd just not give her anything to scream at me about for a few minutes...
I feel like there is so much more to this, it is hard to break it down into a short summary, but I hope I am making sense. My intuition says that I should just continue to talk with her when it is practical, and the other times, I should just shut my mouth, hold her and keep doing whatever it is that I was doing. My husband is starting to question my approach, so I thought I would ask you Mama's that have more experience and insight that I.
In all honesty, I am afraid that by accommodating her as much as we that we are creating a child who will be spoiled and ungrateful. Anyways, thanks for your time and suggestions!!!
